My brother in law gave my husband & I temp. guardianship of his kids. He stopped in this weekend and said he was taking the kids back to TN w/him. My niece 13 refused to go & nephew 9 was already packing. I told my niece that she had to go and should start packing. She told her father that she wanted my husband & I to be her guardians & that she didn't want to leave her school/friends and move out of state. He said he disowned her. I found out today that the grandmother is attempting to get a lawyer to bring her to TN where she would financially support all 3 of them. I have Temp Guardianship papers that were filed on 2/27. I need to pay for them to set a date. should I proceed with this and allow my niece to appoint my husband & I and not get financial support which grandma is saying I wont get and if I do she'll attack her lawyers on me. Im confused and just want to do the right thing. It isn't my obligation to raise her but she asked if she could remain with us. HELP!
2007-03-07 05:23:51 · 9 answers · asked by anabanana 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
wow....first of all....she will resent her father for forcing her to do this....you need a lawyer to protect the child's rights here. as well as yours. If it is Temp custody, he can pull that at any time I believe. In most states she is of the age to say where she would like to reside. The father and the grand mother? need to step back, and let the little girl come around on her own....I don't know what situation she was in b4, but it seems that maybe she was feeling a bit unsafe and unstable b4, and she has found that stability and safety in you and your husband. I hate to see children riped apart like this, it is just not fair to them. If you love her, and want the best for her, see what a lawyer says about the situation.
2007-03-07 05:38:12 · answer #1 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
So he JUST gave you TEMPORARY guardianship on 2/27?
Your niece can’t ‘appoint’ you and your husband for anything. She’s 13. She doesn’t get to decide who has custody/guardianship of her. Would a judge even consider her wishes? It depends on the situation, but provided that Dad is a fit parent, probably not. A judge will consider a teenager’s wishes when it’s a custody dispute between the PARENTS, but you’re not this child’s parent.
I’m not sure what’s really going on at this point. Is it Dad that’s wanting custody back or the Grandmother that’s now wanting custody?
If it’s Dad, I can tell you this…a parent’s rights ALWAYS trump a non-parent’s rights---unless that parent is unfit. And frankly, it takes A LOT to prove a parent unfit. But, I don’t know the situation.
If it’s Grandma that’s wanting custody and Dad’s in support of that…well, you can expect it to be a long, hard battle. One that could get expensive, and one that you may very well lose.
Talk to a local attorney about it, and do it ASAP.
2007-03-07 05:52:12 · answer #2 · answered by kp 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First, It's wonderful of you to be kind enough to raise someone else's child.
Grandma doesn't have rights to the child and can't force her to be in TN. If the father has given you guardianship and waved his parental rights, there is nothing that the Grandma can do besides spend lots of money and get no where. If this all goes to court, which it probably should, the niece is of age to have influence on the decision to where she should live and who she should be raised by.
Just remember, the 'Right' thing in this case is ALWAYS what is best for the child.
2007-03-07 05:30:48 · answer #3 · answered by kelloggs322 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is very hard for a teenage to move from one place to another especially at a time when she is discovering herself. I It is also not easy to find friends at a new school right away. She feels comfortable with you. At early teens she also needs a positive female figure in her life. It sounds that she trusts you. She wants you to guide her and help her make the right decisions. I am not sure about the whole paper process, but I suggest try to keep her for several years or until she will become more mature and independent. The father should understand this.
2007-03-07 05:33:12 · answer #4 · answered by KOTEHOK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all they will ask the 13 year old what she wants your not dealing with a baby..they will give her an attorny and the attorny will do what they think is right for the child. if the father has given you temp custody you can use that against him ...i would fight for the kids and if you loose oh well at least the kids will grow up knowing you tried
2007-03-07 05:34:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Proceed with this is you really want to. Ignore what the grandma says, the laws say differently.
2007-03-07 05:28:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
the father has the right to have his daughter with him. pack her things and take her to the car. promise she can visit during the summer and let her go...this is not your child , it is his.
2007-03-07 05:33:34 · answer #7 · answered by Hi its me again 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
agree 100% with sunbun you are letting your personal feelings get involved if the dad is not unfit he will get custody eentually brace yourself for the heartbreak it dont matter what she want if they are taking care of her and not abusing her in anyway where is her momma at????????
2007-03-07 05:30:36 · answer #8 · answered by peachez 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
sorry unless the father is unfit...the child belongs with the dad and just where is the mom???
2007-03-07 05:27:31 · answer #9 · answered by sunbun 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋