adult circumcision?

Question

My 7 year old son wasn't circumsized at birth due to a complication. I'm concerned about how he will feel when he recognizes a difference in appearance. I would like the opinions of uncircumsized men, women who have dated or married uncircumsized men and men who have undergone adult circumcision.

Answer 1

Most guys in the world (newborns aren't cut in all other rich nations) are uncircumcised. Here in America the rates have fallen a lot, and as a teenager, I can tell you that being uncircumcised really isn't an issue nowadays compared to back a few decades. In some states the circumcision rate is now at about 15%!
http://www.cirp.org/library/statistics/USA/staterates2004/

There's members on these boards who try to scare you into thinking that being circumcised prevents HIV (fact: the United States is the richest country with the highest circumcision rate, and we have the highest HIV rate; only Africa is worse) and that he'll have to have it done when he's older. Don't let them scare you; they argue to feel better about what they have.
https://www.cia.gov/cia/publications/factbook/rankorder/2155rank.html

The only difference is that at this age, you should tell him to slide his foreskin back when he showers and to wash and rinse it. Tell him that it even feels good when you rub it and it only takes a few seconds; I know from experience. This will prevent any problems in the future. =)

Here's some links about how the foreskin works and such:
http://www.cirp.org/pages/anat/
http://www.twbookmark.com/books/70/0446678805/chapter_excerpt15690.html

Oh, and if a doctor ever tells you that "he has" to be cut, read this before hand.
http://www.mothering.com/articles/new_baby/circumcision/protect-uncircson.html

And of course, if he ever asks about it, tell him the truth; that you didn't cut him because he had a complication, and if you want him to feel better, tell him he wasn't tied down while part of his penis was cut away; what could be more comforting than that?
http://www.cnn.com/HEALTH/9712/23/circumcision.anesthetic/

I'm sure your boy won't have any problems or complaints. In addition, you prevented plenty of circumcision complications or negative side effects:
http://forums.govteen.com/showpost.php?p=3069995&postcount=2

He'll be fine; don't worry. If you lived in any other developed country this would be the last thing in your mind!

Answer 2

The fact is today less than 65% of newborns are circumcised in the US. That's down from a record 90% in 1968. So he certainly isn't going to stand out in the locker room these days - some will be, some won't.

The American Medical Association and the American Pediatric Association have both issued statements that routine circumcision is NO LONGER recommended. It used to be recommended back in the 80s, but they have more evidence now that it really has no medical benefit.

An intact adult male has more sensitivity, because they have the thousands of nerve endings on the foreskin - it really isn't skin, but rather mucous membrane, which is highly sensitive. These nerves give a man a lot of sexual pleasure as an adult.

There is no increased risk of STDs in adults; and if the men keep the foreskin clean, there are no other complications or smell.

The only increased risk is for uncircumcised men having unprotected sex with an HIV infected man or woman. This is a bad idea in any case; condoms should always be used. In any case, it's likely that HIV will be curable before your son is old enough for this to be a risk.

The rest of the world does NOT circumcise; only Jews and Muslims do so routinely, and for religious reasons.

At seven, circumcision would be quite painful.

PLEASE don't mutilate your child!

Answer 3

He will probably feel a little different, but that might not be a bad thing. Most guys are very happy they still have their foreskins, a few don't like it. Some guys wish they still had their foreskin, so it's hard to predict what a guy might think about it. If he doesn't like it, he can always get circumcised later if he wants, but I doubt it.

Personally, I've never had any issues being uncircumcised. No one has ever teased me about it, and I've never had any health or hygiene issues with it. Don't believe everything about the studies that support circumcision. Yes, it may be true (even probably). But also, every organ and every tissue can develop problems, does that mean they should be removed pre-emptively? No.

Two things trump almost all medical problems that can arise: good hygiene, and condoms. Neither are a bother. See links for more info that, if concerned about his health, will put your mind more at ease.

Answer 4

At age 7, it's too late to do it now. He will be able to discern what is missing. If you do it now, for the rest of his life he will wonder why you have instrumented such pain upon his most private part... and as for noticing that he is different from his peers... he won't be that different that it will be a burden.

If he so desperately wants it to be removed, make him wait till he is at least 18 and by then his mother's opinion shouldn't matter.

I think you should leave it alone unless there is a medical excuse. Would you had your clitorus circumcised?

Answer 5

I think it would be best for your son to make the decision when he is older if you talk to him now he wont understand and will just agree with you to make you happy, at the end of the day it is not your choice or your partners choice and it is defiantly not my choice it is your sons choice, it is his body. I wish I had a choice in my body being circumcised I hate my parents for it, it will be something I could never forgive my parents for. PLEASE think of your son it is his body if you circumcise him he has to live with it for the rest of his life. Weight until he is older if he wants it done do it.
But have a look at this site. At what is removed when you are circumcised.
http://www.norm.org/lost.html you can also watch videos of it being done on Google video please note it is VERY painful to watch I have never watched it all the way though the boys screaming made me stop it. It was like someone being torched very sad. I would never recommend doing it to anyone it is there choice its there body.
I hope you let your son make the decision.

Answer 6

I had two other uncircumcised partners but they were not long term, they were from other cultures or countries. I did notice they were fantastic lovers but I attributed this to "being on vacation" or "being Latin lovers or hot Italians" or whatever stereotype you hear about that sort of man. I found them (and their penises) to be very attractive.

Then I met my husband who is uncircumcised and honestly it took me a few weeks to nice the difference. I just knew it looked great and felt great, I didn't notice that weird stripe around it that others men have (which I thought was normal but I now realize is a scar) and the skin itself was so soft, velvety and moist. Also, he was multiorgasmic, which was new to me.

So, in the beginning of course I never saw him flaccid, he was always erect the minute he took his pants off and in that state the penis looks the same. But when I was playing with it I noticed it had more skin bunched at the bottom and this skin could pull up and down. I was fascinated with this difference and obviously not bothered at all, in fact I preferred it.

There has never been any trouble with him finding women. Even at 46 and being a good 50 lbs overweight he still has women flirting him constantly, even right in front of me. He tells me there has never been a woman that has rejected him or turned him down and I believe him. He even had a Jewish girlfriend for a year who just loved his foreskin was fascinated with it but informed him that if they ever married he would need to be circumcised - so that was the end of that. We sat down and tried to count his partners once and gave up, but I'll tell you he's had dozens and dozens. Yet, no utis, no stds, no yeast infections. No special care of his penis either, just a shower with soap and water.

Women are more concerned with if the man is kind, funny, successful, attractive with a nice body (nice butt, big penis), good in bed, good chemistry. If you have all that, what does a sleeve of skin that slides up and down on the penis matter?

I have been living with this man ten years now and I'll tell you what - his feet and his armpits can get way more offensive than his genitals. My stepson is 16 now and he has NO trouble getting women (like father like son) and my son (who is 3) looks to be following in their footsteps, women of all ages can't keep their hands off him. And of course grandpa, uncles, cousins - they've all got their foreskins too and they are all fine, never heard of anyone having any kind of infection. I read these posts about these men or women babbling on about "smegma" and horrible smells and I wonder what the heck they are talking about. Do they have some other kind of foreskin than the one I'm used to??? It doesn't make sense? Your son has the upper hand if anyone gives him a hard time. He has more penis, his parents didn't give him cosmetic surgery, no one felt the need to cut pieces off his genitals, he has a choice to do it himself.

Answer 7

I've been with an uncircumcised man before. It made absolutely no difference of any significance. He didn't mention it until we're at a point in our relationship when we wanted to be physically intimate. It didn't matter one bit. I loved him with all his parts and I wanted to be with him. I don't believe it would have changed my mind any if he had said right in the beginning "I'm not circumcised." It's not exactly a topic of conversation and probably would have been weird to just have him volunteer that information. When we came to that bridge, though, I read up on it (hehe. internet does have some uses) and understood that US is in the minority in the world that automatically circumcising the baby boys. So it didn't seem so odd then. To be honest, I then got all curious how it would work. Not curious in a bad way, but just curious because it was different and something I haven't encountered before. My preconceived idea of what a penis ought to look like needed some adjustments. It's no different than men having to make reality adjustments to their preconceived ideas of what women ought to look like. It was something new that I get to figure out. It was an opportunity for me to learn about my bf. Since my preconceived ideas of sex needed adjustments, instead of just assuming that I knew how to do things that men liked, I automatically reverted back to the learning mode and became very attentive to talking to him about how to please him, what he liked, and what irritated him. It turns out that he wasn't really different from other men. He kept it clean. It felt no different with vaginal sex. Pardon me for being graphic about oral sex, but he smelled and tasted no differently. I had no problems giving him a bj. It just required a some difference in the way I orally stimulated him. He had orgasms both ways like circumcised men.

So my one experience is that this is a nonissue. I'd do it all over again. There's just many bigger things to worry about than whether my man is circumcised.

Answer 8

If there's no medical reason to have it done, then I don't know why you would subject him to it. As an uncircumsized adult male, I can look back and say that I've never had any reason to wish my parents had made the decision to have me circumsized.

Answer 9

It won't ever be a problem for him. Only about half of the boys born now are being circumcised in the US (hardly any except for religious purposes anywhere else), so he's as likely to look out of place cut as uncut.

I am married to an uncut man, and his foreskin is very important to sexual pleasure for both of us. Someday your son and his wife will be very, very happy you left him the way God/nature made him. See http://www.healthcentral.com/drdean/408/60750.html for a survey showing that 90% of women prefer UNcircumcised men!

It would be extremely cruel to cut him now, as he would remember the pain and resent your having put him through it.

More than 85% of the men in the world have their natural foreskins. They somehow manage to keep clean and avoid all the supposed problems that the pro-circumcision lobby keeps yapping about.

Your son's body is perfect the way it is. Let him keep all his man parts!

Answer 10

There is a group of people out there that say that circumcision does no good but I disagree.

My 85 year old father-in-law recently had to have a circumcision because of a build up of "stuff" under the foreskin. Had he been circumsized, he would have been able to avoid this surgery.

Get him circumcised.