is 18 too young to have a baby?

Question

im 18 in a serious relationship and both me and my partner want a baby hes 22 do you think we are too young, we have our own house and both have decent jobs, cheers x

im not asking for other peoples approval!
and im not going to go on peoples answers im just interested in others opinions!

Answer 1

If you have to ask, you shouldn't have one.

Age isn't the biggest factor in wether someone is ready for a baby - some are ready at 18, others never are. It is such a personal desicison, and not one you should take lightly. There is no rush, make sure you think this through carefully.

You have to make sure that you and your partner have similar ideas about childcare, discpline and family structure. Is the relationship, realisitically, likely to last? Are you healthy enough? Can you afford time off? Is your house suitable? Do you have a sufficient support system in place?

Answer 2

Think about it this way, are you willing to give up doing all or some of the things you want to do in your 20s? Do you want to go college? Another country? Just have fun? Because having a baby, while it does bring joy into your life, brings a lot of difficulty too. Most couples (especially ones who are not married) find the first six to twelve months after a baby is born to be extremely difficult. You fight more and communicate less. You are very young and you may still be emotionally raw for that kind of commitment.

There is also the fact that an 18 year old isn't necessarily physically capable of being pregnant. Are you getting enough potassium? Folic Acid? Calcium? Are you in general good health? What is your family history? Generally the best years for a woman to be pregnant and have a baby PHYSICALLY are between 22 and 28. It's just scientific. You body is still growing and pregnancy, while is can be a real joy, is one of the hardest if not THE hardest and worst things your body will ever have to endure.

Then there is the financial situation. If you do decide to have a child, make sure that you go and get a financial needs analysis done. It will help ensure that you can pay bills, afford college (should your child want to go) and be able to retire. I know it seems weird to think about retirement at 18, but you're already thinking about having children. It would be a tragedy to live a life you don't want because you didn't plan properly. Below is a link to a company that can assess your financial needs free of charge.

I say think about it more seriously. If you want a baby maybe you should consider marriage first. I know you say you're in a serious relationship but those are very easy to break up if things get too difficult.

Whatever you do MAKE SURE that the decision is YOURS and yours alone. There is no point in letting someone else make the decision for you because YOU are the one who has to live with the cosequences of your actions.

Good luck and whatever you do may you be healthy and happy throughout it.

Answer 3

You'll know when you're ready. If you wait until you do everything you want to do you'll end up being 40 (possibly still not having done everything you dreamed of) a baby will be harder to conceive, you'll have less energy and recover far less well.
Finance is important but don't worry about money too much as people always manage and babies are actually not that expensive if you don't get carried away. They are hugely demanding however and you must be prepared to change your 'life' (I don't think 'give up your life' is appropriate) and be aware that babies cause many changes in a relationship, not all good! : (

If you want a baby, go for it, nobody ever says they wish they didn't have their child and by the time you're 24 your child will be in school and you'll still have plenty of time to study, travel, get a high-flying career (although you say you have a good job now so no need to leave these days, the world is increasingly pro-family)

Best of luck, whatever you decide.
Sarah x

Answer 4

You are too young to think about having a baby. You are still a teenager and try and enjoy your life while you can. Its good that you are a mature 18 year old with a stable relationship and secure life. Most people don't have that at your age. So consider yourself lucky and try to do all the things that you want to do like maybe get more qualifications, travel the world etc These are things that you won't be able to do once you have a baby. Becoming parents changes your life forever. Its a huge responsiblity and will drain your time and efforts 24/7. So, my advice is to wait till you are atleast 24.

Answer 5

I'm 38 years old and when i think back to the days a long time ago when my grandmother was married at the age of 12 and started having children at the age of 13..i shake my head and wonder how they did it back then. Today we live in a society that is judgemental..You are the one to make the decision on wither to bring a child into this world or not..You are 18 years old and if you ask me you should live your life a bit..Get married..travel..see the world a bit..enjoy your life while you are young..I've seen many of my friends have children at your age and by far they don't regret having the children but they all say the same thing ..if they could do it over again they would have waitted..why the rush..with the economy the way it is.you should work and put money in the bank and save save save..Most people who live a what is considered a normal life these days..go to college or university and then get married and purchase a home and these days people are starting their family at around the age of 27-32..Before you have a child you should be married .have a home and two vehicles one of them paid-off and atleast 10 thousand dollars in the bank..that way you can have your baby and be secure and have no worries..good luck and live your life to the fullest.

Answer 6

I think personally if you feel readythen go for it, people mature at different ages, My partner and I are trying I am 18 and he is 19. I had a miscarriage in July and afterwrds we felt this is what we wanted, we have no plans to get married because I do not believe in marriage but I love him and feel I want to a raise a child with him. we are in very similar situations but the way I look at it I never went to college I did an apprenticeship and my partner got a job at 16, we are both a lot mature than many of my mates that went on to college and uni as we have had to grow up quickly. so I reckon if you feel ready and you have talked about eveything then why not, and no one can say whether it is the right or wrong time except you and your partner. good luck what ever you choose.

Answer 7

Can he afford to look after you when you aren't working and provide for the house, the child and you? Any no's there - don't consider it.

Thing is people who are 18 have kids all the time, but it could make thigns difficult between you as you both may end up being fed up of not enjoying your twenties and the nights out and the possible promiscuity.

My opinion, you should wait a year or two - whats the harm in that? Then you can run off a production line of footballers.

Answer 8

My now husband and I got pregnant when I was 18 and I had my baby at 19. I was also married at 19 (before the baby). We were engaged before I got pregnant. We now have a two year old and a two months old and we are wonderful. We think we have the perfect life. So it is all up to you, if you believe that you are ready emotionally to have a baby and you believe that you and your man will be together and can give your baby a happy healthy home then yes you can have a baby. If you don't think these things then NO do not do it yet!!

Answer 9

You are just beginning to make decisions on your own, right or wrong, they are yours. Your feelings are going to change over the coming years and as they do, you will realize you don't know everything that you thought you did. Just don't push it, you have time to plan and enjoy your freedom. I moved out when I turned 18, got married at 19, had a baby at 24, and got divorced at 35. Of course, I truly believed he was the only man I would ever love, it always happens that way. Just kick back and you will grow inside yourself and you will see your ideas change because now you are able to do only what you once thought about and then you will start to really change. We all need this time to really get to know ourselves and if we can't make ourselves happy first, how can we ever make someone else happy?

Answer 10

WOW, i thought i was alone im 18 and my husband is 22 lol but we are trying also for a year and 1/2 its not too young i feel like im 25 not 18 so know where you are coming from well we are in the same boat right now.but i know your not too young cuz if you are then me and my hubby are too b/c we are all the same age good luck on conceving the baby !!!!