friend or lover?

Question

i got back in touch with one of my old friends from when we were kids, we use to date, an last year we got back in touch an 4 weeks ago he asked me to get back with him i said yes, an we spilt up the other week, the fing is i really felt horrible after tellin him an later on he we were talkin an he wanted us to give it a go an try an make it work, so i said yes to him, an now i keep thinkin to myslf have i done the rite thing as theres somethin tht keeps tellin me i havent, he is a nice guy we do get on well, but am i better of as just havin him as a best friend or am i just worred over nothen? i cant seem to win coz what ever i say it seems to be wrong inside, also my mum is not to fusy on him over lil things what hae been said..am confussed coz i dont wanna hurt him an i dont wanna loose him, please help me thank you

Answer 1

What you should do first is ask yourself if you really want to be with this guy? Secondly, I think that you may be a little unsure about yourself, like a bit insecure. I don't mean that in a funny way its just that some guys n gals have insecurities you know? If something keeps niggling away at you then take that as a positive sign that something isn't just quite right. A woman's intuition (known as gut feelings) is usually the best way of knowing because you will know deep inside you if this guy for you is right. The best advice I can give you is this:Be just friends to start with (even though you already know him but that was when you were kids), then, if anything does develop after that initial phase, take a good long look at the broader spectrum, if it feels right, then you will know. I know from personal experince that if something does not feel right, it usually isn't. I bet you that other people who read this will say the same thing. You don't say how old you are, maybe he is a bit older or you older than him? If your mum isn't too fussy on him, then, again it isn't your mum that is trying to get with him is it? She is your mother and if she doesn't like him or thinks there is something not right about him, maybe she is right, but as said, it's entirely up to YOU what YOU want to do. I hope I have been of some help to you.

Answer 2

He surely like you a lot. Forget that you both dated when you were kids. Why did the "fling" failed? It is because you are moving to fast or you don't really knew as you thought you did. If you really like him you can start over but sit down and talk of about to him. Since you both are best friend that doesn't mean you can cross over to lover status immediately.You still have to back to the first date basis. Remember not to rush.

Answer 3

Sounds like you are answering your own question - so I will say before you lose him get him to be your friend and he will be with you for life if he is a good one. Lovers often find no way of going back and keeping a relationship on a friendship level.

Answer 4

Sounds like you are really confused,what does your heart say?or is this just self doubts?How does he make you feel,happy when you are together?I think you and him need to sit down together and calmly discuss what you both want,never mind what other people say or think,this relationship is between the two of you.Obviously there is a communication problem between you or lack of it because if you don`t sort it out then either one of you or both of you are going to get hurt............good luck.

Answer 5

i knw the confusion you have as to should you or should you not but hey ho u would knw the answer to that. seems liek u miss him already and cant live without him or maybe u just want to get back to gether but hey, he is an oild friend. he may not be the same person now as he used to be so get to knw him again really really well and decide tehre after but for now i fink it should be froiends. its up to u tho.

Answer 6

What a garbled tale! Do what YOU want for goodness sake!

Answer 7

keep it as a friendship only then see how it goes