Parent's always treating sons as second hand?

Question

My father hate all his male sons, and always has a soft corner for his two daughters. I feel bad he does not respect or regard any of the daughter-in-laws. While hhe over protective of daughters and son-in-laws. There is a very big rift in my family due to this. My mother's health has declined. My sister's health has declined, all of us have started to distance from each other. My parents are not realising the gravity of their discrimination. God bless my parents and the future of my family. Pls suggest a way out.

Answer 1

Since you are the son, your father expects you to take care of yourself. He is over protective about his daughter as all other parents are. That shouldn't be an issue. The rift is not due to your father's behaviour but due to your own incapability of understanding what your father expects from you.

I don't have any sisters, but do have a younger brother. My parents have a soft corner towards him. They were always a bit rough when it comes to me. But look at the impact thatr had on my life. No matter what the situations are, I can handle them efficiently. It's due to that attitude of my parents, I could develop myself into a successful professional. I was able to concentrate more on my career just because I knew I don't have to worry about my brother. Else, as an standard family goes, the elder brother, guiding the younger, he has no time for himself.

Since your dad is concentrating more on your sister,s that allows you some space to think about yourself and develop your career. If you keep worrying about the things that you are missing out, you won't be able to utilize your time wisely and end up stranded.

Don't tell me that your sisters health declined just because your dad is over protective. I fact I cannot find any relation between his inclination towards his daughters and the rift in your family. maybe you are jealous of your sisters.

Analyze the conditions in your home properly. Analyze yourself properly. make valuable contributions towards your family. Leave the rest to God.

All the best...

:-)

Answer 2

You know ....I don't know much ...but I will say this...in my Mexican family it was daughters were always put 2nd hand...it took a long time before I realized I hated what my parents were doing and not my brother for their actions. You can only attempt to make the bond between you and your siblings by trying. Although remember that this is something you are doing out of your love and that you don't owe them an apology for what your parents have done. Remember Empathy not sympathy! Give it your best shot to make ammends with them, but if they won't make an effort, it's best to let sleeping dogs lie.

Answer 3

i suggest that you speak to your sisters and express to them how you are feeling first before approaching your father. Also look at why your father does not like you -have you done something to upset him or offended him in some way. If that is the case speak to your Mom about the best way to remedy the act that led to the fallout.
I hope all goes well for you.

Answer 4

i wud suggect single small family is better than joint. all u married couples have ur own life in a different house lil far from ur parents and come adn take care of them whenever needed or frequently. thye will relaise the difference of kids being with thme and going away. after u leave them they will realise the emptiness of the house and ur importance. this will also give u peace of mind for sometime.

Answer 5

good question there is nothing you can do,many familys has this problems specialy middle class,there are reasons for this.dont wait for any solution in that house all this will go on.make your own home away from all this,if you have children all this will have bad effects on your children.but one thing is sure if he is having some chance to talk to you in perso ask if to go to some psyciatric he as he will not listen to your points or will not trust you,or as some psyciatric to visit your house as if he is your friend,he him self will speak his mind to him and you will get the inner picture of his brain.

Answer 6

Is it your father only or both your parents who are treating you and your brothers like that? Have you tried to analyse the reasons for this kind of behaviour on their part? Are you sure that they have absolutely no reason to complain against their sons?

Answer 7

Dont mind. You are absolutely wrong in your approach. You owe everything to your parents n when u get married u for get what they hve done for u n because of pressures{unseen}your thinking hve changed. In ur case u are sandwitched. Better take control n only on merits change ur behaviour towords them. Daughter in laws hve a set role to play n dont ever allow them take them for granted n u will see a change in your house.Give them what they deserve on merits n merits n merits only. Pl send me yr reply pl ,I am yr welwishers

Answer 8

Be confident and ask them why they are so biased. Tell them that if you mother or your sister in law die, then it is completely their fault. They are acting like idiots and if there is some misunderstandings, then tell them to work it out. This is too much! I hope your family is ok.

Answer 9

I genuinely have 3 babies. My oldest is now 18. I genuinely have been "responsible" of no longer liking her at circumstances. From the time she grew to become into 11 till those days she intermittently made our domicile a residing hell. could no longer understand why she in basic terms could no longer get it. We gave her an analogous kit for existence that we've given our 2 youthful ones. genuine formerly she grew to become 18, she grew to become into clinically determined with Bipolar sickness (manic form). This has actual defined lots, and made it much less annoying to understand her habit. Like your place, we had an excellent-keel, yet every time she grew to become into domicile, it grew to become into like somebody grew to become up the adrenalin point on our domicile. It grew to become into definitely draining. relatively, i think of our kin continues to be improving. I genuinely have a son who's 10 years previous, and has under no circumstances carried out something which you have defined approximately your son. So i'm not sure the place this familiar consensus of "generic youngster" stuff that your answerer's have suggested is coming from. you already know that it particularly isn't generic. And it looks you have carried out extraordinarily lots each and every thing approximately it that there is to do. Do you have any kin with which to deliver him for small quantities of time so as which you would be able to get a destroy and recharge your self? or perhaps occurring an Asperger's or upload website, to the touch bases with those mothers, who may be able to factor you in the superb suited direction, or a minimum of permit you vent without judgment? I in user-friendly terms advise this because of the fact it seems such as you have self assurance those issues already. Please understand that your thoughts are your thoughts.... you are able to not help them. Feeling melancholy from a desperate concern is generic. and that i for one provide you kudos for attempting to vent and detect a answer. regrettably, Yahoo!solutions is (in many circumstances) approximately as efficient as a toothache, a minimum of in the parenting and marriage and divorce sections. Please preserve your self, and the superb of success to you and yours.

Answer 10

ITS VERY HARD TO KNOW THIS AND I REALLY FEEL SORRY FOR YOU ,YOUR BROTHER ETC.GO TALK TO HIM THIS IS THE ONLY SOLUTION . DON'T BE HARSH TO HIM EVEN AFTER HE YELLS AT YOU AFTER ALL HE IS YOUR FATHER AND HAS BROUGHT YOU UP.I SUGGGEST YOU SHOULD TAKE YOUR BROTHERS ALONG WITH YOU AND SEEK FOR AN OPPURTUNITY WHEN YOUR FATHER IS IN A GOOD MOOD (e.g.his birthday etc)AND TALK TO HIM ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS ,WHO KNOWS MAYBE HE WOULD SAY WHAT THE PROBLEM IS .ITS BETTER IF YOU TALK TO YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THE ISSUE AND IF SHE KNOWS ABOUT THE ISSUE CONVINCE HER ALSO TO TALK TO YOUR FATHER.IF YOU HAVE YOUR PATERNAL GRAND PARENTS TELL THEM ABOUT THE ISSUE AND CONVINCE THEM TOO TO TALK TO YOUR FATHER .IF YOUR SISTERS ARE INTELLIGENT AND LOVE U ALL A LOT THEN ONLY TALK TO YOUR SISTERS ABOUT IT SO THAT THEY UNDERSTAND THE ISSUE AND TALK TO YOUR FATHER {BEWARE YOUR SISTERS MAY ALSO THINKT HAT YOU ALL ARE JEALOUS OF THE IMPORTANCE THEY ARE GETTING } ITS BETTER IF THE WHOLE FAMILY IS IN A GOOD MOOD AND ARE SITTING TOGETHER FOR COFFEE ,BREAKFAST OR DINNER TOGETHER.