ok my first daughter(she is now 7) i could put in her bouncy seat/swing and get things done during the day.. we just had our second baby (she is 3 weeks old) and i'm getting really worn out and frustrated- because she constantly wants to be held. It seems like I can't get ANYTHING done- because she always wants to be held. She hates the portable swing-- she hates the bouncy seat-- she hates the papasan...
she's eating well.. getting burped.. plenty warm..
i cant even step outside for 5 minutes tohave a smoke.. or take a shower.. or make a decent lunch-- i need some advice.. because by the time oldest gets home from school & dhhome from work- im completely at the end of my rope..
will it get better? am i doing something wrong? could i be doing something better?
2007-03-07 00:09:22 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Read The Baby Whisperer by Tami Hogg, it saved my sanity!
2007-03-07 00:31:14 · answer #1 · answered by JenJen 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At three weeks old, she should be napping off and on throughout the day. That's your 5 minutes. :) Add all the naps up and you probably have more than five minutes. I think the problem is, you want to do what YOU want WHEN you want, and with a newborn, that's just not possible. You have to resign yourself to the fact that even though you'd dearly love to take a shower first thing in the a.m. when you wake up (especially after being awakened by the baby a few times the night before), most mornings, it's just not going to happen. You're going to have to forfeit some of your "me" time (while baby's napping) to do things like shower, eat, etc. I have a feeling that you won't have any real alone time for the next 18 years or so...
Seriously, keep your chin up. I'm sure you're doing everything fine. I know it must be hard having older children and now a newborn, but it WILL get better.
2007-03-07 13:55:39 · answer #2 · answered by brevejunkie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What time does daddy get home? There should be a few mins when daddy takes baby and mommy can shower and go to the bathroom on her own. She is only 3 weeks and she will grow fast so hang on. Try letting your 7 year old talk to her in the bouncy seat while you cook dinner. My baby Bjourn was my best friend and now I carry my 2 year old in an Ergo baby back pack, she is still near me but my hands are free. As for sneaking a smoke, what a great time to quit. Good luck and remember tomorrow is a new day.
2007-03-07 08:59:34 · answer #3 · answered by Tawni B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son was kinda the same way when he was first born, he HATED his swing (it was a waste of money, I never used it) and he wanted to be held alot, the only thing that seemed to work was I bought one of those floor mats with toys that hang overhead (the soft one for newborns) and I put a mirror at the top so he could look at it. He thought it was his "friend" and he would just stare at it and make the cutest noises.
It was about the only thing that worked until he was about 2 or 3 months old and he decided he wanted to be independent.
2007-03-07 09:14:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, she's still very young and hasn't been given a chance yet not to experience having you around. Get her used you leaving for 5 minutes at a time a couple of times a day to start. Just let her cry away. Crying won't hurt her. Gradually increase the length and frequency you are away and she will get used to it and come to have a better state of independence. You don't mention a husband, but if you have one, he should be stepping up and stepping in to help in this regard also. It's not just your job.
Good luck hon!
2007-03-07 08:29:09 · answer #5 · answered by LindaLou 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look just lay her in bed and do what you need to do. If she cries she will live! Sometimes and with some kids its all you can do. It will get better as she gets older (which you probably know already). Try just putting her in a stable not rocking type seat and in front of the tv the pretty colors keep some kids occupied for 5 minutea. You are not doing anything wrong every kid is different just keep trying new ideas and you will come up with something that works.
2007-03-07 08:33:28 · answer #6 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It will get better.I know what you are going through.My DD are all past that but my grandson is 6 months and I cant leave the room without him crying.I so look forward to 3:30 when school is out and Mommy comes home.LOL I do know it gets better because when mine were little It seemed like IO had triplets.There is 2 and 1/2 years between my oldest and youngest.With my middle ddin between.
2007-03-07 08:16:56 · answer #7 · answered by toomuchpain 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you've been blessed with a high needs child. It will get better. Try to cut yourself some slack.
If she will nap alone, do those things when she is sleeping. If she's not, I would have her checked to make sure there is no underlying medical issue like reflux. I slung my son while I fixed lunch and dinner, that worked well.
You are not doing anything wrong. It's okay. It'll get better.
2007-03-07 10:08:13 · answer #8 · answered by April 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's still very young and may need that cocoon feeling that's gone when they leave the womb. Try wrapping her in a receiving blanket, just enough so her arms and legs don't flail about, before you put her down.
If the problem persists, of course you should discuss it with her doctor on her next check-up.
Hope it soon gets better.
2007-03-07 08:23:19 · answer #9 · answered by Patricia S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It won’t hurt the baby to cry in her crib for 7 minutes. You just need to make the decision that you’re going to go out for your smoke despite the baby. When it’s time, put baby in her crib and go have your smoke.
(I recommend closing the door behind you so that you don’t have to listen to the baby cry while you take your “time out”).
Crying for 10 minutes in her crib won’t hurt the baby but missing out on a little break here and there is totally taking it’s toll on you.
2007-03-07 13:52:41 · answer #10 · answered by babypocket2005 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋