She has accused me of being anorexic/bulimic, just because I'm slim. She 'tells me off' in front of others when I make mistakes and all I do is try and be the best I can. I'm even trying to look out for a better job for her in newspapers - as she want to progress. I'm sick of trying to be nice with her. Am I being too nice?
2007-03-06 23:15:50 · 14 answers · asked by Say It Like You Mean It 4 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
yes you are being too nice, accusing you of being anorexic/bulimic is bullying. You should speak to your HR dept about it. She should never tell you off in front of others, its just bad management.
Don't stop being a nice person, but you need to look out for youself.
2007-03-07 07:56:06 · answer #1 · answered by david2131uk 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely. Tell her where to go in no uncertain terms. If people think they can get away with this type of behaviour, then they will continue. Don't be rude, but be firm and tell her (not in front of others) that you do not appreciate the way you are being treated and feel it is unfair. If this does not resolve the problem, you're better off looking in that paper for a better job for yourself. Don't take crap from bosses, you don't deserve it and they should know better than to treat people like that!!
2007-03-06 23:24:42 · answer #2 · answered by Princess Paradox 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Did she ask you to look for the better job? If not, when you present it to her, she'll likely throw it back at you and say all you want to do is get rid of her.
Do you have a harrassment policy at work? If so, this may qualify.
As for you being too nice, I can't really say. I personally wouldn't be actively looking for a job for my boss, though might pass on the word if I saw something in passing.
Depending on your relationship, and whether you can meet with her privately, you might wish to mention her behaviour to her. After she puts you down in front of others, you could say, "I was embarrassed about talking about my mistake in front of everyone today. I appreciate getting your feedback, and want to do a good job, so if I do something like that again, could we talk privately?"
2007-03-06 23:32:20 · answer #3 · answered by CanadianBlondie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your boss is being deliberately rude and awkward towards you confront her and tell her how you feel and ask if she would like you to leave THEN you can get her for constructive dismissal and sue the pants off her, but don't tell her that until you get to the bottom of her problem. Her management skills are definitely missing if she is admonishing you in front of other staff....you might mention that to her as well.....you don't have anything to lose if you are already looking out for another job. Don't be rude back to her as you will be sinking to her level.
2007-03-06 23:28:05 · answer #4 · answered by JonBovi 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can do one of two things. You can sit there and take her abuse, until you believe her when she belittles you and you wake up one day not knowing who you are. That's what bullies do to their victims.
Or you can talk to her superiors, and tell them about her conduct. If she wishes to progress, then that is up to her, not you. You ARE in an abusive relationship with your boss, and you should extricate yourself from it ASAP. If you have documented evidence, anyone wishing to provide witness statements on what they saw/heard, and any other evidence that gives proof to your allegations, you are in a position to bring legal action against her and the company you and her are employed by. When someone is verbally abusive, in nine cases out of ten, the abuse turns physical. If she has sworn at you, or belittled you using swear words, such as calling you a f*ckwit for example, then she has crossed the line into criminal assault, by abusing you from her position of power. As an employee, you are entitled to a peaceful and non-abusive workplace, that's the Law. Do yourself a huge favour, and lose the job. But not before you talk to her superiors. If they don't take you seriously, leave the company and bring a class action lawsuit against them. Do it before you're just another statistic.
2007-03-06 23:36:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
|Your are being far too nice.
It seems that you are being bullied. If I were you I would contact Human Resources and get this sorted. If you don't then in the long run you will damage your confidence.
Why are you looking for jobs for HER to progress ? You should be looking for a nicer place to work for yourself !!!
2007-03-07 00:04:24 · answer #6 · answered by kaps_mr2 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
find a new job, WALK OUT THE DOOR
work is bad enough without putting up with that! i was in the same position last year, one comment too many and i just gave in my notice (politely) and on my last day --she apologised and told me all her personal problems! (horrible people are usually only horrible because they are sad about something)
good luck
2007-03-07 00:57:38 · answer #7 · answered by ravey 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Now that you are in the "working world" you need to learn how to stand up for yourself. No one can treat you poorly unless you let them!
Speak to your boss in private (never embarrass her in public). In a calm tone, explain to her what she is doing and how it makes you feel. Let her know that her actions are unacceptable and that you expect them to stop immediately.
Document your discussion in a private journal. Keep track of dates, times, and who said what. If the matter continues, you will have records for your HR department head, or for the Department of Labor.
2007-03-06 23:22:25 · answer #8 · answered by kja63 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It seems like you have a common interest in you finding her a better job.
2007-03-06 23:25:57 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has absolutely no right to make personal comments about you. That is harassment. Put in a letter of grievance about her to her boss. Make sure you have proof though.
2007-03-06 23:23:35 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋