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My father is the most dogmatic and obstinate man in the world. Perhaps he is to blame for my subdued childhood. I was never one to fight back and never sought retribution, even when indignant remarks were aimed at me. The only thing I have in common with my father is my oblique nose, a congenital trait I might add."
2007-03-06 22:08:41 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Education & Reference ➔ Homework Help
this is how it makes sense:_
My father is the most dogmatic and obstinate man in the world. Perhaps I blame him for my subdued childhood OR Perhaps he is to be blamed for my subdued childhood. I was never the one to fight back neither did I seek retribution, even when the indignant remarks were aimed at me. The only thing that I have in common with my father is my oblique nose, which is a congenital trait I might add.
2007-03-06 22:57:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have an issue with the second sentence in general and "subdued childhood" in particular. It's vague and doesn't build empathy, sympathy or attachment to the character.
Can you expand that thought a little?
What specifically did he do to subdue you?
How did it affect you?
How did you react?
My humble suggestion is that you show yourself being subdued rather than leaving it to the imagination of the reader.
2007-03-06 22:30:19 · answer #2 · answered by seattleogre 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would substitute revenge for retribution, as retribution seems all encompassing, but revenge seems more personal. Have a good day.
2007-03-06 22:17:01 · answer #3 · answered by wheeliebin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it does. Was that your only question?
2007-03-06 22:12:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋