school/advise?

Question

My grandchild who is 13 hates school so much its making him ill-When there is a half term he is fine till a couple of days of him going back.He gets stressed in lessons,his legs start to itch,and he feels sick.He been to a specialist about a bad stomach,he thinks its stress related.Its a absolute nightmare for him and his mum .It causes so much tension because his mum dosent want him to lose out on his education or send him to school wondering if he is ill or just panicking-,do you think this is just a phrase and he will come out of it or is it a regular event with some kids.help .what do you do when you are being pressured ,put in a possition where if your child is of school you could be threatened with court.Has anyone been in the same position

Someone has said there isnt enough detail down,so anything to help.My grandson was bullied in the infants and juniors,When he went to high school it continued but we got it sorted.He insists this dosent happen but does see the boy there.He has been through losing to great/grandparents in a short space of time and being sensitive he is worried sick about anything happening to myself or his mum.he doesnt like being in enclosed spaces or if there is a lot of people about,this seems to of been coming on slowly over the last 2 years.Thank you so much to the ones who have answered

Answer 1

I have that problem too, i am 14 years old and i hate school. I have my reasons but cant seem to explain them, but yuo can always try to find out.
Sometimes i dont even know whether I'm panicked or sick, its just a mtter f whther the parent will allow the child to stay home.
My parents are seriously lookig into letting me change schools, they trust that i will make good decisions if i need to and are trusting me that i do need to change schools without them knowing all the reasons behind it. sometimes you just have to trust the kid.

Answer 2

There should be a reason for him to hate school so much. For all children school is a necessary evil but they cope with it without too much stress. If things have come to psychosomatic responses like itching and feeling sick, then there is positively something that makes school intolerable. Some reasons might be: a learning difficulty which makes him feel stupid and useless, low self-esteem because of his looks or his body (not so unusual in teenage years, they all think they are ugly), bullies at school, a teacher that undermines his self-esteem or anything else that makes him feel out of place. Whatever it is, his mom should take him to a psychologist or a school councellor or just talk to him (although he might not be too open with her). You can try to talk to him too. Sometimes whatever children can't tell their parents, they will willingly share with another trusted person. Try to help him as fast as you can. Even for a grown-up it is hard to handle that kind of stress and for a teenager it must be devastating.

Some additional advice: I don't know if you are believers or not, but the best way to fight fear of death is to learn the truth about God. I was terribly afraid of death when I was younger and went through a big depression when i was 18. I accepted Christ when I was 23 and although I am still afraid, I know death is not the end of it all so at least I can live with the thought of it. Maybe going to church or talking to a councellor in church can help him resolve his fears.

Answer 3

I would take him to a therapist to speak with. His fears may go beyond school, he may be developing a phobia or several of them that need to be addressed. A phobia can be very debilitating.
Maybe there are other options available to him. Even different types of schooling. I know that we have a program that is held off campus. With no more that 15 students, it is taught just like mainstream, and a therapist always right there. Instead of trying to force him to "fit in" with mainstream look at other options that may be available to him. A therapist could help with this, but also call your Board of Education.
To lessen his anxiety may help him to enjoy school and perhaps widen his opportunities for the future. Good Luck

Answer 4

I used to do the very same things. I put my mom thru so much when I was in school! Could something have happened to him and he is traumatized about what happened?

When I was little, I was molested. After that, I couldn't do anything that brought attention to me what-so-ever. I stopped playing sports, hated going to school, and didn't have but one friend. Maybe you should talk to him and see what is going on that is so horrible. Hang in there cause it may take a while for him to open up. It took me a while to finally come out and tell my mom.

Good luck.

Answer 5

Sound like he has an Anxiety Disorder and is overly paranoid of social situations (school classrooms/crowds), fear of him getting hurt or dying, fear of others being hurt and dying etc.
I would get him some help by talking to someone who specializes in this. It usually doesn't get any better without a specialist and medication is sometimes prescribed to soften the anxiety. No amount of boosting his self-esteem from you is going to work, he has to be able to want it, for himself. The only way he can learn to overcome this, is to seek proper help.
Home schooling may help the situation for the time being, during his therapy. Eventually, he should be able to handle social situations better and will be able to go back to public school. Good Luck.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

there must be an underlying problem thats causing this anxiety. maybe hes lonely in school, picked on, or just flat out depressed. he may need to see a psychiatrist just to atleast talk to somebody. i'm guessing you're not from the U.S. but there must be some sort of home schooling that might be better for the boy.

Answer 8

You don't say why he hates school. You need to work out why he hates school before you can make any decision, such as home schooling.
But certainly, if he is this upset, I'd consider changing schools or something.

Answer 9

wow that a loit may be if you put him in a parvity school it be bettrer

Answer 10

tell him to tough it out.