please listen to my story and answer..................................?

Question

I am 27yr old married with 1 kid.living in another country away from my family and inlaws.only me,my husband and kid.
I sincerely love my husband and want to be with him for the rest of my life.r kid is so cute that life looks full and complete with her.my husband also loves me and has no affairs outside no bad habits like smoking or drinkin nor goes out alone with friends.
we visit our native place once in a year for 30 days and again back home.
I am a post graduate,so decided mutually that i will go out to work and help him financially though he earns a lot.also to build my own career and to send my kid to the no.1 nursery in the country,naturally was very costly and needed both of us to work.
luckly i got the job and doin well and even my kid is goin to that nursery.
NOW MY PROBLEM ARISES:
my daughter's delivery expenses were paid by my parents as acustom from my country to do so.but he never said a word and took the money,i felt really bad but kept quite.now she is 2 yr

goin tosame nursery and i am payin the fee there.he bring clothes and food and toys every thing for her,there is no doubt he doesnot love her,but when it comes to the money to be paid for some party or stationery items when the nursery people ask,he refuses to pay even that small amount and tells me to pay.i feel so bad because all my salary goes for the monthly fee and the extra i donot have.i kindly request him that please pay from ur pocket i will return when i get my salary next month refuses.it hurts very badly.
Now that his parents have come to stay with us for 2 months things r more bad.that is another issue.now i am so hurt i cannot tell.why does he behave so rude.anything i want to buy for her,he says why it is so expensive.no and no,but later he buys.but this attitude hutrs me lot.

Answer 1

What is the problem? It sounds like you have a pretty good life to me.

Answer 2

Interesting story but I don't get what your problem is. Is it because he didn't thank your parents? Is your husband not able to sit down and talk with you when something is troubling you? This needs to be cleared up at least between you or it will fester and cause problems in you marriage. You said he didn't say anything and took the money. Is he also from your country and is following the tradition or just rude? Or maybe he didn't know the tradition and was embarrased. I do not think that most of the people answering read it right...you did NOT say he took it and didn't pay the bill (or reimburse your account after you paid it). I don't know why you did not say anything at the time or thank your parents yourself. Why are you bringing it up now after two years?

I am disappointed to hear that you work when you don't have to instead of spending time with you daughter. The first three years are so important and being with you is so much better emotionally and educationally than sending her to the world's best daycare. Spend less money and stay home with your daughter until she is in school and then only work part time.

Answer 3

I don't really understand the question, who took the money and who never said anything, but if you both knew, and just haven't said Thank you, then just do it now and apologize for taking so long. Your parents will probably understand and just be glad that you acknowledged your mistake and appreciated their gift. I agree that your husband should sign the letter. Hopefully that was the question.

On another note, quit your job and stay home with your daughter! She will grow up so fast and you will someday regret missing the time with her! Money can't ever replace time or love. You will be okay with his income and your career can come when she is grown up - not just in school, she needs you til she's out of the house! The best nursery/babysitter/school is still not as good as you! Good luck!

Answer 4

Let me get this right: your husband took money that your parents sent to pay the hospital bills and didn't say anything? First, are you sure? How do you know? Is the hospital bill unpaid? Did your parents tell you? Are you sure they're telling the truth? If all this is true, there may be other problems of which you are unaware. Look for character defects in your husband: are there other ways that he may be dishonest? I think ultimately you will have to ask him about this and see if his answer makes sense.

Answer 5

You feel guilty because you could have afford to pay for the medical expenses on your own? Or now you can afford to pay them back but haven't? Or wait you had full medical coverage and did not need the money but your husband took it anyways?Well you said it was a custom for your parents to pay so it is fine. If you had not taken the money they may have been offended. I am and American- land of the greedy and I say you should not feel any shame over this- now if you did have medical then your husband should feel guilty and pay your parents back w/o actually paying them back you know like maybe paying for them to come visit you

Answer 6

Once you say it is a custom in your country( india), it means it was not planeed or forced on your family.
Second, you can always payback to your family, if not in cash then in kind or some gifts.
Please donot let these tings affect you as they are not faults, they are customs/social practices.
You should have objected or refused when this all happened, now be happy and live a peaceful life.

Answer 7

hmm too late to get angry. have to do that at the time of the occurence. if what he did caused you hardship...he should be ashamed of himself. what was his reason for doing it...then telling you? reason it out for what is was...maybe it was time to pay it and he feared you wouldnt have agreed...maybe his parents were feeling a hardship or needed to help another family member. if you have faith in your husband to do the right thing...then you should trust his judgement on his action. however, you should tell him that its an offense against the marriage and you wouldnt think to do such a thing without a mutual discussion. these things can cause future marital discord and bad feelings towards one another. talk it out and then put it behind you. peace

Answer 8

Send your parents a letter and express to them how you feel regarding their kindness. Tell them how much you love and appreciate them, and that for you not to mention any word of thanks was a mistake. Your husband should also sign the letter and add a paragraph with an apology and a delayed expression of thanks. Prolonging the days with not responding will make things worse in the long run. Make amends & tell your parents how you truly feel.

Answer 9

wait do you propose this is all white? or merely like specific places? in my opinion, i think of white hair is actual outstanding! I kinda envy you... my mom won't permit me bleach mine. and plus, nature gave you that shade hair, and that makes you unique. So embody the awesomeness and teach those people in ur type which you do no longer care care what they are asserting!!! YA! Sorry, to lots sugar in my cereal...

Answer 10

It's been two years. What would be the point of upseting your parents now? It is true that sometimes what you don't know won't hurt you.