When a man opens a door for me, or insists I exit the elevator first, I can't help but be offended. I'm a healthy young person, who happens to have a vagina, why does this mean I can't open a door? Am I the only one who finds chilvalry sexist?
2007-03-06 17:42:53 · 14 answers · asked by Maggie 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I must say, I'm shocked by the answers. Soxy-You don't have a problem with sexism? I find that very strange.
2007-03-08 09:13:23 · update #1
I'm thinking you shouldn't read into things so deeply and I do find that sweet. Sometimes guys are just being sweet. geeze I open the door for people all the time just because I am a kind person that likes to seem sweet and helpful and kind and all. Of course we all know we can open the doors. there's the guy at my work that puts my jacket on the hook because I can't reach it well but there's nothing sexiest about it.
seriously one thing like that, like a guy just wants to be nice you shouldn't punish them for that. You should be more uptight about them disrespecting or degrading you. Honestly you make it seem like they can't do anything right.
Now if a guy was all like taking that to the extreme, like not letting you think for yourself and planning all things out and babying you, of course that's not right. but what you're saying just seems offensive to me.
My ex boyfriend George gave me his jacket last winter because I told him I was cold and it felt so good because I felt like a girl. I hadn't felt like the before, like girly, the romance and all and I've always wanted that.
I do find it very offensive that you used the word vagina in the way that you did. We're all people dispite our body parts and we are women but you can't just think the way that you do. ok if personally you don't like it fine we can't change how you think. I think that you are being insecure in this matter though. You automatically believe that when a guy is doing that that he thinks you're not able to perform a simple task and of course that's not what he's thinking and I can't believe you'd be so blind to see it that way.
Just take a deep breath and relax. They are good guys out there and there are guys that want women to feel good. Those actions can be with either sex for the same reason but it's not a sexist action. only when taken to the extreme it is a problem. We are women and can enjoy chilvalry but of course we know when it goes too far. A man can be that way and still feel and treat you as he is your equal. I love the romance and the sweetness of it all so please don't put it out there as it's a negitive thing. We are women, we have a mind of our own but we can enjoy the simple things in life.
2007-03-14 18:21:04 · answer #1 · answered by dabluschmosprincess 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't find it offensive at all. In this current day, a man is more than aware that I can open the door myself and that my vagina has nothing to do with it. Maybe a little old fashioned but considering so many feminists would break his neck for daring to be so polite, it takes a man with balls to offer!!! I have no problem with a man opening a door or offering to let me go first etc if that is how they were raised and what they believe is the right thing to do. It does not make me a weaker being or inferior to them to accept their offer. It is just courtesy and respect. Of course it is sexist but what is the big deal about a polite man opening a door for you? Enjoy it!!
2007-03-06 23:26:41 · answer #2 · answered by soxy 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
These days I think it is sexist. The poor guys are trying to be polite. The origin of the custom of chivalry was to show respect and/or deference to women and acknowledge the fact that we could be/have been mothers. When these practices started we wore very long skirts and holding up your dress while opening a door was difficult. I know more info than you needed.
2007-03-06 22:31:32 · answer #3 · answered by Star of Florida 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Chivalry is offencive... politeness is offencive? Pick your battles. Chivalry is dying... so is politeness.
Be offended by women being abused through violence. A man does not think any less of you because he opens a door for you or lets you off an elevator first. Stand at the back of the elevator... Does it ever occur to u to open a door for a man?
2007-03-14 17:07:01 · answer #4 · answered by front door 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think of its a intense-high quality gesture. i admire whilst adult males open doors for me, i assume it makes me experience like gents nonetheless exist in this international. Or once you're going up or down an elevator and a guy facilitates you to pass first. I in simple terms think of that it particularly is a intense-high quality element to do and don't think of that it makes women seem vulnerable or or no longer equivalent in any respect. I in simple terms re-study my answer and one in each of my sentences must be taken the incorrect way, lol, oh nicely! Edit: i replaced into on the medical institution the different day and there replaced right into a line up on the canteen. those 2 docs (who have been of course on a injury) pushed in front of me and have been particularly rude and obnoxious. I gave them a great dying stare and one stood in the back of me however the different did no longer care approximately being rude in any respect and stored status there. So i assume once you have adult males like this interior the international, a intense-high quality guy beginning a door isn't the worst element interior the international which could take place.
2016-11-23 12:35:55 · answer #5 · answered by ussery 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
eat a fukkin dick *****, ud rather us spit on u and slam the door in ur fukkin face...ppl open the door/ hold the door open for other ppl b/c its an act of kindness, not b/c they are attracted to the person in any way shape or form, whether they are or not is completely circumstantial, coincidential and a whole other topic....now chilvary is awesome b/c it gives women respect and public notice of their being and equality, its ***** like u that are too retarded to understand and have an askewed view on chilvary that make us men confused and ununderstanding of women which leads to their unequality....if u really want recognition, stop bitching, and be the 1st to the door and hold it open for some1 esle, or just stay in the elevator and say no thats ok u can go 1st....a real independent woman wuld not complain about chilvary, but hold it dear b/c she realizes that it gives her an opportunity to be an equal member of society....if u wish to further this discussion email me bakk...if my email doesnot show its vincichinski@yahoo.com....later
2007-03-14 18:24:44 · answer #6 · answered by Vin C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is simply a matter of politeness, if a man were to do these actions in a mocking way then i would be able to justify your reasons for hating these acts of kindness. why not open doors for them also? it does not always require it to be the other way around. it has nothing to do with someone thinking you are incapable of opening a door.
however, i do think that one should not waste too much time being upset with a thoughtful gesture and simply smile and say thank you.
2007-03-14 18:03:40 · answer #7 · answered by emily_the_butthead 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was totally raised that way. I do it every chance I get. Some times, I rush a little to get to the door first. That is just honor and respect.
2007-03-14 16:54:42 · answer #8 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask my wife. I do not understand why you should feel that way. Some men (including me) are so used to pleasing their women so that it becomes a part of them automatically doing so even to others. That is an act of humility.
2007-03-14 18:48:06 · answer #9 · answered by Nim P 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
im from the the old school i love and respect women i always open doors
2007-03-14 13:27:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋