I know its none of my business what she does, but my co-worker often smokes and she is pregnant. The other day she asked to borrow money to buy a pack. I wish i could talk her out of smoking i just feel so bad for the baby and i feel guilty not doing anything. I know its not my place but i wondered if there was a tactful way to get her to stop?
2007-03-06 16:54:38 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Nope, I would stay out of it. Her life to do as she wants. But, I would not loan her money to buy them though.
2007-03-06 16:57:13 · answer #1 · answered by punkin_eater26 6 · 2⤊ 3⤋
I see a whole lot of non smoker opinions here and just wanted to say that it isn't always as easy as just not smoking. Some people can quit easily when they get pregnant. I couldn't. The doctor's opinion was not to try. The stress of quiting can be worse for the baby than the smoking. The woman should be trying at least to cut down as much as possible if she can't quit. I was able to cut down to 5 a day from my previous 25 a day. She knows what she is doing most likely and you will just cause stress for her and yourself if you choose to approach and lecture her on the subject. (it's not your place) The child does not inhale the smoke and at this point it is not considered abuse. I always suggest that if someone is "planning" to get pregnant, they should quit all together "before" getting pregnant. But if they didn't plan for it and got pregnant while still addicted to smoking they may not necessarily be able to quit as easily as people think. And I know myself that I put a huge amount of stress on myself because I felt guilty that I couldn't "just quit" like so many people told me I should. Don't upset her, it won't help her or the baby.
And fyi the child does not go through withrawls or become addicted. I believe that is with cocaine and heroin. My children, both of them came out perfect and happy with no ill effects as well they were both not under weight or have any issues whatsoever.
I am bothered by some of the statements I have seen here.
I do not condone smoking while pregnant. She should quit but some people can't do so easily and without stress on the fetus.
And no it is not up to you to fund her habit anyway.
2007-03-07 02:58:30 · answer #2 · answered by rosey55465 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people desperately want to quit for their baby's health but are unable to. I know because i am one of people. I have tried numerous methods and now smoke no more than 5 cigarettes a day. I feel so uncomfortable smoking in public or buying cigarettes. People are so harsh towards pregnant smokers. Just be there for your friend, I'm sure she knows the dangers of smoking while pregnant, and i'm sure she feels guilty each time she lights up, don't make her feel worse. Smoking is an addiction and non-smokers cannot relate to the intensity of cravings like a smoker can.
BTW The baby is not "breathing in smoke" WOW do a little research, fetuses don't breath oxygen prior to birth. *Even a dumb smoker like me knows that* LOL
2007-03-10 05:56:23 · answer #3 · answered by Amber 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, there probably isn't. As she is pregnant and smoking, there will be two people that will have to come off the habit - two people with nicotine withdrawal symptoms... It is a shame, but on the bright side for her - she will probably end up with a small baby - a big plus if she has it naturally!!!!!! On the down side there are all the complications (that we are aware of), of smoking during pregnancy and the forevermore aftermath of diseases etc... that the baby/child/adult may develop as a result of being born to a mother who smoked. Also, if the mother was around someone who smoked during pregnancy the baby will be just as exposed to the danger.
She has the right to smoke - She is a big girl now... It is wonderful that you care - on behalf of her baby. But thats probably as far as it will get...
2007-03-06 17:05:40 · answer #4 · answered by Pooroldpossum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably knows the risks. Telling her them again will just piss her off. There is no way to get her to stop. Just don't give her money for the smokes. Some doctors say that it is bad for you to quit after the 1st trimester because the baby will go through the with-drawls with the mother and this could cause a premature birth.
2007-03-06 17:52:13 · answer #5 · answered by lilly j 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to go to www.babycenter.com. They have all kinds of information on there. In this day and age there is no way that she cannot know that smoking is bad for her baby, but she may not be aware that not all problems are apparent at birth. ADD and ADHD are just one of the causes of smoking during pregnancy. My mom smoked with all 4 of us kids, and although she cut back, she still smoked and all of us have ADD. Maybe print out some info and anonymously set them at her desk or work area.
2007-03-06 17:03:08 · answer #6 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Smoking is extremely addictive.
At the same time, smoking whilst pregnant is terribly unhealthy for the baby (as I understand it, the baby will be born with the addiction, and will behave badly as it goes through with drawl).
As for a tactful way to suggest that she stop - the best you can really do is point out that its a bad habit when pregnant, as its bad for the child.
You're in a really awkward situation. But its her choice, and I'm sure her ob/gyn has pointed out the dangers. From there its really her choice to risk her child's health.
You're in a situation that frankly sucks.
Best of luck,
-dh
2007-03-06 17:01:46 · answer #7 · answered by delicateharmony 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Kindly let her know the harm it can cause her baby. She may already know it and not care and yet she may not know it and needs to be told. She will surely understand you are just being nice and think of the welfare of her baby. If she doesn't care and doesn't listen to you, then try not to let it bother you. She will soon come to terms what she is doing wrong in her own time. Just hopefully its not too late. Be kind and gentle about it. Don't be forceful or you will definitely make her angry to the point that she doesn't care at all. But you do need at least to try and say something. Let her know there are other options to relieve stress if that is her issue, especially for the sake of her unborn.
2007-03-06 17:01:48 · answer #8 · answered by Koozie 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell her of the health risks she is doing to the baby. Don't lend her money to buy cancer sticks. Look up the effects of smoking in pregnant women on the internet, print them off, and slip them into her purse when she isn't looking. Maybe seeing what she is doing to the baby will make her quit.
2007-03-07 05:24:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is her business, but as a caring person, you are thinking of the next generation - fair enough. Not only is she jeopardizing the baby's future, she setting up problems for herself - which means a high probability she won't be around, or be sick, when her child grows up.
Perhaps next time she asks a favour, first suggest she has a read of this great information here: http://www.quitguide.com/smoking-during-pregnancy.html
2007-03-06 17:42:36 · answer #10 · answered by megancrtr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is terrible! Has she seen those ads at all! I reccomend a conforontation. Don't worry, you are doing this for a good cause. If you feel uncomfortable due to ur co worker status, you can always tell a more authoritative person like ur boss to tell her. I think she is probally aware of the danger but not aware of the seriousness of the issue. Im from canada...and its totally illegal to smoke indoors. If you dotn have that law, advise your manager to inforce it to keep hiygene in your company and reduce her habits. Have fun!
2007-03-06 17:01:25 · answer #11 · answered by H4X0Rshocks 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋