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I have decided to become a gestational surrogate this summer. I was just curious what risks were involved, as far as the intended parents and my relationship are concerned. I am a mother myself, so I know all about pregnancy, but I guess I'm just wondering what the intended parents are going through, and what they think about their surrogate, etc. ? It would really help if I could get an answer from someone who has been on either end.

2007-03-06 16:03:21 · 3 answers · asked by Jessica A 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting Pregnancy

3 answers

I have actually seen surrogacy in action, mainly due to my work in IVF.

I have no idea where you are in the world or what the law is like where you are regarding this, but before undertaking any surrogate agreement I would recommend specialist counselling for all concerned, so you are aware of the expectations of the couple and they are aware of your requirements, and even iif no money is changing hands - get a legal contract put in place.

You need to provide for contingencies such as: birth registration, will they need to adopt the child, visitation, will the child be biologically yours (from donor insemination) or not biologically yours (IVF transfer using donor embryo), what happens if the child has a problem or is disabled (would you agree to a termination?), who is liable if anything happens to you - either you die or are rendered disabled or infertile by the pregnancy, who pays your prenatal costs, what happens if either party changes their mind after the pregnancy has started, if they will support you financially if you can't work while pregnant, will you breastfeed the child, will the baby leave the hospital with them... it goes on and on.

Proper counselling will go into not only the legal/administrative stuff involved but also the emotional side of things as well, how they feel, how you feel, how their family feels, how your family feels, bonding issues etc.

It's a seriously complicated issue, way too deep to go into in a yahoo Q&A.

It's best to be managed by professionals, to get the best result for all parties - especially the baby. A counsellor and/or lawyer expereinced in surrogacy can give you a better picture.

Please don't enter into anything without getting i all down in writing.

Best of luck.

2007-03-06 16:12:17 · answer #1 · answered by SydneyMum101 6 · 1 1

I would think that they are greatly appreciative of you all the same trying to only think of you as a oven cooking the bread:) Don't take offense to that but I would imagine it is a hard experience on them not being able to feel it move around in her belly and all those other wonderful things of being pregnant, but all the same it is a wonderful thing.

2007-03-06 16:08:29 · answer #2 · answered by Shawna 4 · 0 0

Visit this website: http://www.surrogacy.com

http://www.houstondivorceattorneyfamilylawyer.com/gestational-agreement.html
http://www.creatingfamilies.com/researchivf.HTML

2007-03-06 20:43:01 · answer #3 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 0 0

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