Help............?

Question

Ok to start off please don't be ***holes about this. I REALLY don't need that BS.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

^This is where my problem started. In short he's 20 I’m 16, we flirted had a great time(for whole story see link above, you may have to copy paste it). Now he's all I can think about, I called and left my number at the gym he works at(again see long version). But now all my friends are like you shouldn't have, you can't go out w/him, don't even think about it. So out of 4 friends 4 have disapproved of me even talking to a guy who is 20. but my mom says to go for it as long as we aren't doing "it." I wanna talk to someone about everything, how I feel, what I’m going to say, what we would do if we went out(like where we would go), but I don't have anyone to talk to and I don't know what to do. *I just wanna go get rid of all these feeling but I can't cause I don't have anyone to tell.* What should I do?

So y'all know I am a FIRM believer in abstinence.

Answer 1

It would really help if you had someone to talk to, I know how it feels to be stuck with a lot of feeling you don't understand and have no one to listen to you. I know it can be hard to find someone but what about your mom? And it wasn't wrong of you to leave your number. In the end, you have to make the choice and since you're 16, your parents could have a say and since your mom is ok with it, you should just see where it goes. If anything seems wrong or out of your comfort zone, you should get out of the situation. Hope that helps a little. : )

Answer 2

The link isn't working I am not able to read the entire story.
There is nothing wrong with the age gap of 4 years. I understand why women go after men who are older. After all women do mature quicker then men. And you do have a head on your shoulders because abstinence is what you are firm on.

Both of you are suppose to flirt, meet alot of people, date, push boundaries, etc.....at this time in life its part of getting a perspective on relationships.

My concern is your 16 and he is 20. Its the age it self not the gap. Its the lack of experience.
Later down the road you most likely will see this as your first crush after all you have met someone who captured your attention FULLY for the first time. That is why your feelings are so strong you truly think there is something in it.
Also at the age of 20 men like to play the field. Alot of things are said because they can be said. I say that cause it still happens years down the road....
Sure enjoy spending time with this person but also you must keep in mind you both are young yet. And should not put all you eggs in one basket, others will soon capture you're attention for different reasons like instant attractions. personality, humor and so forth.
Please dont take this wrong as to what Im saying here. I just dont want you to fall in love already and be hurt badly. Enjoy his company....but keep you're eyes and ears open. Your head and gut feelings are usually right.

I do understand how you feel after all I was 16 once too. Looked older, acted older so was able to take advantage of of that.

Answer 3

Darling, 4 years' difference in age is great when you are my age (42) but you are only 16 and this guy is grown! Does this guy believe in abstinence too? I doubt it. Older people have a special ability to hold sway over children, like yourself. He could use this against you. Why don't you find a boy your own age to date? That way, you'll be roughly on the same maturity level which will level the playing field.

In a nutshell....My advice is DON'T GO OUT WITH THIS GUY

From someone else's mother:)

Answer 4

You may be a firm believer in abstinence but a 20 year old guy is not going to be. What you should do is think about what your friends, who know you very well, have said to you. Are you currently dateless? That may be the problem - you are not seeing anyone and lonely.

Answer 5

For one thing-you need to clean up your language as it has no place here.
Surely you can explain withouut foul talk. Stick with abstinence--you are too young to be having sex. He's 20? He's too old for you. Your mother is way off. She should be protecting you instead of encouraging you. You are a girl headed
for serious trouble. Will your mother take care of your baby and if you get a std
is that alright, too??

Answer 6

He's a little too old for you.....I know iknow age is nothing but a number....but what do you two really have in common....plus he could get into trouble especially if if it gets out that you two have had sex... So keep it on the friendship level. Hang out go to the movies, the park, a concert, an art museum. Honestly most guys his age want to play PS2 all day. you'll prolly find out that he's really not all that he's cracked up to be.
Since you belive in abstinence (which is great), if he ever tries to get you to break that promise you've made to yourself kick him to the curb ASAP.

Answer 7

Well...the problem is that he probably will stay away from you if he is worried about your age.

I stated dating an older guy (years ago) and eventually married him and we've been married 49 years.....but things were a little different then. Obviously you can't get physically involved with him.( he could go to jail)....but like you . my husband and I believed in abstinence before marriage.

I wouldn't, however keep hounding the guy if he is trying to stay away....if he's interested, he'll be back.

Answer 8

he's going to jail with mommy behind him kicking his ***... stay away...