years..He has 3 other children from prevouse relationships..We plan on getting married but he doesnt want another baby?what should I do ...
2007-03-06 08:05:19 · 15 answers · asked by mommie2005 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
and let me get this across he was married before and has kids with her...So no he is not neglecting his other kids....He is a great father
2007-03-06 08:29:45 · update #1
You have to decide whether or not you are willing to live with only having one child that is yours and your furture husbands.
You can't force him to want anymore and you can't stay in the relationship hoping that he will change his mind; cause chances of that happening with the amount of kids he's already got are slim to none. From his previous track record it doesn't really sound like he's expecting anything too permenant with you. Which is proabbly also why he doesn't want anymore kids...too many child support payments to too many different women.
If you're happy with only having one kid with him then stay with him, if not then you need to find someone that wants the same things as you do, which you should have done before you had the first kid with him, but its too late for coulda, shoulda woulda's now. LOL
2007-03-06 08:14:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't force the issue, and if you love him enough to have only one child together than you'll have to agree. Don't marry him if you want another child and don't love him enough to give that up. I know its hard but I've been through this with my sister.
He ended up giving her a 2 year waiting period for the baby and then after that 2 years, he said No. They are divorced now. It is a big deal. You'll have to come to an agreement and know that you'll both have to stick by it no matter what because you love each other that much. Good luck
2007-03-06 08:11:54 · answer #2 · answered by sassinya 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both need to agree on the number of children you want. I see his point -- he is already responsible for raising and supporting 4 children. That's more than enough!
But if you truly want another child and he does not, then stop the marriage plans right now. If you cannot compromise and reach an agreement on this issue, don't get married.
2007-03-06 08:08:31 · answer #3 · answered by kja63 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Listen to him. You are placing undo financial stress on him, back off. If he wants another kid he will say so.
Do you feel that he has the time to be a good father now? Why because he works all the time, ya he has to apy for all those kids. Let him enjoy the kids he has
One of the greatest mistakes women make is forcing men to do things that they don't want to do, then they are so surprised when the men cheat on them or leave them.
2007-03-06 08:10:59 · answer #4 · answered by Harmon 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does marriage have to do with this? Is he the same one that knocked you up the first time? If so, he wasn't willing to give the kid his name so he's not marriage/family material. Find a real man and move on.
These irresponsible jerks are just wasting your time and the sooner you learn that the better your life and your child's life will be. Let him find someone else to shack up with that doesn't want a family.
2007-03-06 08:11:32 · answer #5 · answered by Raylene G. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him and he loves you, then you should be able to reconcile. You have to both understand eachother's points of views. Ask yourself if you can deprive yourself of this for your whole life, if it's something that you really want, then your man should understand that and want to give that to you, but if he is going to be unhappy when you wind up pregnant, you do not want a baby out of negligence. Just talk with him, when you hear what you do or don't want to hear, then you need to look in your heart and make your move. Is there a ring on your finger, are you truly happy, does he love all of his kids, could he love one more, or would he be bitter? Be true to yourself.
2007-03-06 08:10:23 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you asked why he doesn't want more children? The financial burden of 4 is great enough - I can see why adding another would scare him.
Oh, & I agree with the others, if he is set on no more & you are set on more then stop the wedding. Don't do it & then get yourself pregnant 'by accident'.
2007-03-06 08:08:52 · answer #7 · answered by ang_phx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really can't make him want another baby. After all, he already has four kids. That's already too many if you ask me! But if you're really sneaky, you can always put a hole in the condom. That's how my sister was conceived!
2007-03-06 08:09:50 · answer #8 · answered by ☆Kristi☆ Lucy Jane's Mommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 is a hard age...I would say give it a few years so the child is more capable of taking care of itself before bringing on another baby...
But I must say this, dont let this problem take over your life...try to work it out...
2007-03-06 08:10:17 · answer #9 · answered by Casey shouldabeen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont push the issue be grateful w/ the baby you have and
just love your man and baby give him all your time and love
at this age he NEEDS a lot from you mom
one more that will be FIVE for him dont you think that is a bit much for 1 man
2007-03-06 08:12:52 · answer #10 · answered by ez-goin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋