do u let people know when they hurt u??

Question

or bottle it all up and one day go on a crazy spree of destruction??

Answer 1

sometimes I do because i hate confrontation

Answer 2

As good as this sounds, going on a crazy spree of destruction can have its recourses. By all means, be strong about what you believe in, and let this person(s) know what is on your mind. Here's the secret which some people tend to fumble on: It's all in the approach! How does your voice sound? What does your body language say to them when you approach them? Have you given him/her their cooling off time if needed? These and many others are aspects to think about when deciding to tell someone they hurt you. Sometimes it's quite simple like stating "Hey, that comment wasn't cool, that kinda hurt" or sometimes it's a lot harder when subjects like replationships, or cases where lots of emotion are involved. Usually being the later of the two, it's always advised to speak your mind, for the benefit of both yourself, and the other person. A word of caution when dealing with someone who may be hurt just as much as yourself; THINK about how they will react to what you say, and how you say it. Bottom line though....Say that they hurt you, and more importantly, say how it makes you feel. It's quite an art being able to do this without triggering their emotions as well. Some people do it well, as others may need guidance. My suggestion is to speak with others around you, role models, who are level headed in this sort of field. A lot of times symbolism can have a negative effect on how they take your statement of "you hurt me". Especially for the guys.. If you are going to use symbolism or "props" such as flowers please do it towards the end, after the point was made. this will create less confusion and possibly prevent another war. As for the ladies, men do prefer to hear things straight up without insults or severe criticism. These approaches work well with both intimate relationships as well as friendships, or professional relations. If you find this at all helpful, and have more to ask, please contact me, and I will be glad to respond. Good luck. -Matt

Answer 3

Unfortunately I don't let people know - even though I know its worse for me as I bottle it up, get frustrated and end up getting very upset with them and just pick at everything they do for a week or so- its a vicious circle!!

Answer 4

I let them know - if you dont communicate something it doesnt exist. I'm not overly sensitive so its not often that people hurt me but when they do I get it out in the open.

Answer 5

i dont know personally. if i really noe the person, i would let them noe on the spot. if not, i would bottle it up and take it out on someone that i care about, like family. and then regret it afterwards.

Answer 6

sometimes i do both. if i feel its silly i keep it in than it gets bigger and bigger and i explode on th ewrong person or in the wrong way. but usually i tell my feelings and than seem cold and hurt the other person. so i try saying sopmething about whats bothering me as it happens to avoid furthur conflict

Answer 7

No, I bottle it all up. i don't like letting people know they hurt me, coz it then gives them control.... they know that they have the "power" to hurt me.
It's all about giving up control...

Answer 8

I let them know - or else they will continue and then you will have to blow up and tell them when you hit a breaking point.

Answer 9

I do let them know when they hurt my feelings

Answer 10

I'll let them all know at once some day.

Answer 11

I let them know...mainly because if I don't....then they are going to think it is ok to keep doing it..& then I will be in constant pain...or go numb....I can't have either...