My husband left for Canada, leaving me and the kids with no money. We're in Tennessee. Can I get any child support from him? There is some state agency that will try and get child support from Dads who leave, but can an order be enforced across the Canadian border? I need money really urgently, he hasn't given us anything for a year and I'm living on credit cards. I'm so scared - running up huge debt...what can I do? I think a divorce would be really expensive, too much now as I have no money left at all... I have no family to help, they all love my husband as if he were their son, and I feel like no one cares.
2007-03-05 13:49:43 · 18 answers · asked by katy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm not yet getting any child support - my husband went away and left us when my daughter got ill. He took a job in Canada. So for the person who asked why he left - it's not that child support was too high! Nor was access denied! I'm still married to him. But he left, and I don't know why, not sure if he has someone else or if he was scared by the illness of our child. Or if he was just fed up with having a family and didn't want responsiblity. He's a professor - maybe it was just his work comes first.
But I am broke and trying to feed the children on no income at all. I'm not out to deny access or get a lot of money - just enough for food and basic necessities, and I would really like to divorce and start again. But for now, I just need some child support - I am getting heavily in debt, and it's very scary. Thanks for the answers!
2007-03-07 15:20:36 · update #1
Icewoman - thank you - and what rights would he get that I would regret?
2007-03-12 13:27:05 · update #2
Yes child support can be enforced.Go petition the juvenile court for support
2007-03-05 13:54:41 · answer #1 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say you are getting heavily in debt but that has got to stop. You can't live on credit cards. Maybe you think no one cares but you have to have at least one person who can take you in, realize your situation (I doubt anyone would love your husband as if he were their son if he has abandoned you), and give you a chance to start working to pay off the debt you have already.
Child support is not going to pull you out of debt, either. It is child support, a relatively small amount compared to debt and interest - your problems are financial so concentrate on that.
A divorce would be expensive but you could still talk to a lawyer about whatever recourse you have since he abandoned you - I don't know what there is but it is above all a legal question.
Again, your problems are financial. If he's not coming back, they are just going to get worse. Seek help from family first and get whatever job you can - because I imagine you don't have insurance or any other benefits from his job.
2007-03-13 14:29:58 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While I do think you should work, you should think about improving your earning potential. Talk to schools about financial aid and get training for a career.
That said, I would go to a lawyer because you have been abandoned and he has responsibilities to you and the kids. You may be able to get a judge to order your husband pay the lawyers bill. The fact that he has left and sends no money puts you in a strong position. While the judges order may not be able to be enforced right away he will have to stay out of the US is found to be in contempt of a judgment, or go to jail. See a good lawyer, don't let fear stand in the way of providing for your kids. Many lawyers will give the first consultation for free so keep interviewing lawyers until you find on who will take your case knowing that your husband is the one who should pay the bill. Ask is the first meeting is free before making tha appointment. Be strong and don't be a victim.
2007-03-13 06:36:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anna W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ABSOLUTELY. Canada, United States, England and many other countries have child support treaties, but no more than between Canada and the US.
The enforcement techniques are just as cruel from province to state. The question is, did the dad leave because child support was so high it was crazy, or was access denied? Not that this is an excuse to take-off, but it may be a reason or contributing factor.
2007-03-05 22:59:47 · answer #4 · answered by Ottawa Father 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hopefully, you've already taken the advice from "kelannde" and contacted Legal Aid. Do something fast: 1) call legal aid, 2) get help from food stamps, salvation army, etc. As for the credit cards. Yikes, only use when absolutely necessary; and once you've settled your immediate needs and are more settled, you can work on getting out of debt. A good site for learning to stretch money and manage debt is: http://www.stretcher.com.
You will get through this, and when you have you'll realize how strong you are. I wish you the best.
2007-03-13 06:30:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Canada is a part of the states and you can have that support order enforced, the sooner the better. I wouldn't care what his reasons was, i just know he is a bum and you should also get him for alimony. Talk to a lawyer and tell them your problem and also ask them can he be sued for your lawyer fees as well as child support and alimony.Also, get another credit card in his name and use that and have that in your agreement also. since he did not care for you or the kids in a year then he should be liable to pay that bill also.
2007-03-10 11:37:58 · answer #6 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the operator and ask for the "statewide child support enforcement" number. All States in the US are Federally mandated to have a centralized child support system. That system works with other States as well as other countries that we have agreements with. I don't know if Canada is among those countries, but it would baffle me to learn that they are not.
The child support enforcement folks in Tennessee will be able to give you better advice than I can.
2007-03-05 14:07:48 · answer #7 · answered by Martin Pedersen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is behind in child support, you can go to this site www.supportkids.com or if you never had him on child support, you should be able to go to your local Social Services office and sign him up for child support. If you have his information like his social security number and things like that then that would help them find him. When they get all the info they need from you, it might take them up to 2 months to start sending you money. But they will let you know if they can help you or not once you go speak to a worker there.
Good Luck!
2007-03-05 13:56:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since you are not divorced, the issue is called "abandonment" rather than child support. Call an attorney to get some advice. You say you are running up debt-- are the credit cards in both names? If so, you are actually running up his debt, too.
http://www.tennlegalaid.com/Home/PublicWeb
http://www.las.org/
http://www.tba.org/LawBytes/T1_1002.html
these sites have link to Tennessee legal aide offices. Call one Monday to get this resolved.
2007-03-11 13:39:31 · answer #9 · answered by kelannde 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
chances are, if he's in Canada, you won't be able to get him to pay. Canadian courts have no joint agreements with US courts. this is a case where you would apply for welfare. file for divorce as well. get a court order for alimony and support. once he enters the US, he will have a warrant out for his arrest. welfare will go after him for all the money they paid you. then they will go after him for all the money he owes you for back child support with interest. i know this isn't immediate, but that's the only thing what will happen.
2007-03-05 14:02:43 · answer #10 · answered by Bella 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i think you can talk to a lawyer see if they can advise you how to get child support since hes in Canada and a legal aid could help if you want a divorce its low or no cost for people that doesn't have any income its odd your family is for him instead of you and i agree with Anna w she made lot of sense
2007-03-13 13:06:10 · answer #11 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋