Can anyone help?

Question

When I was younger, I was raped by someone close to me. I was too afraid to tell anyone because my family all loved him. I couldn't hurt my dad or my grandmother...as they were closest to him. It happened for several years...from the time I was 9 until 14. It would happen every summer whenever he'd come to visit (he lived in another state).
Well, a few weeks ago, my sister was visiting. We were talking, and she told me she knew about what happened to me. I was shocked. I'd never told anyone, and I certainly didn't want my little sister knowing about it. I asked her how she knew, and she said he had bragged to her about it and told her that if she told anyone he would hurt her. Thankfully, we haven't seen him in years, but ever since she told me that, I've been having nightmares. I keep dreaming about people hurting me and my family. It's driving me nuts. I don't know how to make it stop or what to do about it.

Answer 1

First of all, you have carried this secret with you for a long time. It's time to talk with someone about it. I don't believe by telling your grandmother or your father that they would be hurt, they would probably be more angry at this person. Your sister kept this secret out of fear, now out of guilt she has confessed to you. Even though you have not seen him, he has done his damage. Please talk to a counselor, you may have been blocking a lot of memories and your nightmares may get worse. This will affect your life now and in the future if you do not find the right way to deal with this.
Whatever happens, you must know that you AND your sister were victims.

Answer 2

I'm so sorry that this happened to you. It is wrong and the man should be punished.

Talk to your sister, she may have been a victim as well but is scared to tell.

Are you still living at home? Tell your parents if you can. He's a scum bag and doesn't deserve your protection even if he's your dad's friend. Your dad would want to know that you've been hurt.

Get professional help either through individual or group therapy. In most communities there are great groups that can help you to talk about the problem, feel less alone, and hear what has been helpful for others.

Answer 3

I think you should try and find him so he can be prosecuted. If he did that to you, God only knows how many other people he's done that too. I know that will probably be hard for you but I really think it's the best thing you can do, even if it does mean that your family will find out. They would probably want you to tell them. Anyway, whatever you decide to do, I hope you can somehow eventually put this behind you so that it doesn't affect your life anymore.

Answer 4

it would be best to talk to a councilor about this first they will hep you put this into perspective then decide what to do then,they usually have free help at women abuse centers or they can help get you started ,its like you have been carrying baggage with you for years and talking with your sis made you open it up for a peek but its still on you back kiddo so get it off your back and talk it out you will feel so much better good luck ohh and call the host for info on counseling if you don't have any luck finding anyone

Answer 5

this is a very serious thing. you are living with fear and no one is helping you. i think it is better to seek some help from professionals or confront it to your family. i know how hard this thing is. i wasn't raped but there was this person who is close constantly asked me sexual things and it was very hard to tell to my family but i did it. it helps a bit. trust me i have a hard time to forgive him . so the best way to do is just tell to people you trust or as i said just go to professionals. if you are a student i think you could get help from psychologists without paying. i wish you the best

Answer 6

Get a lawyer, then hunt the pig down and hurt him. You'll need the lawyer afterwards.