One of my best friends has not been receiving the grades her parents expect her to receive. They expect grades over 85, and she usually receives 75 - 85. She is amazingly talented, can draw and sketch like I have NEVER seen before, she is fairly smart and can play piano like a true musician. She is Chinese and her parents believe strongly in education (she moved from China to Canada when she was 4 years old)
Her parents have told her they do not want a daughter who is not smart or lazy, and if she refuses to 'smarten up' they don't want her and will send her back to China. It is currently second term right now and they have informed her that if her grades are bad this term, she will be sent back to China before the next term. They won't allow her to return to Canada if her grades are not satisfying (she knows she does not have ALL 85 and up)
I will miss her so much, and I don't want her to return to China to live alone with grandparents she barely knows. I'm just a friend, so I don't
2007-03-05 10:49:42 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
have much of a say in this, but I feel awful. I don't know what to say anymore. I don't know what to tell her. Her parents have mapped her life out for her - they want her to be a doctor, receive good grades in everything and NEVER fail. My friend goes home, cleans her entire house, plays the piano for two hours daily, makes her own food and does her own laundry, day by day. There is rarely anyone home for her to talk to.
If anybody knows what I can say or do to help my friend, I'd really appreciate it. <3
XOXO,
Laurie
2007-03-05 10:51:16 · update #1
-It will not be an option for her to stay with me, as her parents do not allow her to spend the night anywhere, so she has never slept over anywhere. If it is against her parent's wishes (which it is) my parents won't allow it.
2007-03-05 11:12:03 · update #2
That's terrible...sounds like her grades are pretty good and if she didnt have all that work do to instead on studyin maybe she could get the grades they expect. She's on Honor Roll from the sounds of it so what more do they want? Ask your parents if she can stay there till her grades come up, explain what is going on...they might just come through.
2007-03-05 10:57:33 · answer #1 · answered by ♥Mommy to 3 year old Jacob and baby on the way♥ 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Unfortunately, that's the strictly-enforced cultural teachings brought upon young Asian immigrants nowadays, whether in Canada or the USA...
Like in San Marino, CA, the mostly-Asian population does NOT believe in after-school sports, ONLY violin/viola lessons, etiquette lessons, and Saturday "cramming" sessions...hence their football program is about to go away...
The State Dept. of Education is going after these stupid parents for NOT letting their kids have a life outside of high school...
Call the local school superintendent(or as a last-ditch matter, the nearest RCMP detachment) at once, explain your situation to them and let it go from there...
Good luck...
2007-03-05 21:49:33 · answer #2 · answered by pauline m 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well her parents expectations of her might be different from what you are used to based on cultural differences but what they are doing is well w/in thier legal rights as parents. They probably feel western society is dragging her down and she will do better and be better in China. If you want her to stay help her study and obtain a B +!
2007-03-05 22:16:17 · answer #3 · answered by jillmarie2000 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
that sounds so sad... i may be a guy but that is rather sad.
2007-03-05 20:27:14 · answer #4 · answered by speedy >>> 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋