I have been bullied, 15 years later i still feel the afteraffects.
2007-03-05 08:18:46 · 18 answers · asked by possessed Regan 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I still do, yes. Don't really want to talk about it on here; just to let you know you're not alone.
2007-03-05 08:27:23 · answer #1 · answered by - 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Feeling the afteraffects means that you're still trying to make sense of it. The only way to make sense of it is to understand both sides.
The bully and the bullied both get something out of the experience. I'm not saying that someone victimized deserved it! However, the bullied person has a perspective into that process that they can use as a source of strength.
Turn that pain into growth and you will feel more whole. Imagine yourself as the bully, then the bullied, then on the outside as both. Then instead of feeling fear of the bully and pity for the innocent victim you once were, you can feel compassion for both. This will help you heal.
2007-03-11 19:26:42 · answer #2 · answered by erathossd 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have to say I think it's not the bullying, it's the mindset, or personality which attracted the bullying in the first place. I think it's a kind of magnet for people who want to push others around. So, for the aftereffects, I think again, it's not the act itself which is staying with you, it's your default setting.
The people who are able to move on, just decide to move on. they'll just walk away and not give it another thought - within seconds.
2007-03-13 06:10:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends on whether you are a girl or a guy ... I got bullied in grade 6 and since then i became interested in martiaal art.. and i met a bully in grade 11 and he just happened to want to bully me,,, man that was his worst mistake of the day ... i feel bad now for what i did to him, i made him apoligize to the little grade 10 he bullied, and he got mad and i forced him to do it, and he did it. in that sense, at this very moment i can feel the aftereffect of being bullied 5 years ago
2007-03-11 11:51:30 · answer #4 · answered by bio c 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It can last - especially when we hold onto the emotion, or keep reliving that particular patern. I was bullied and held onto it for a long time - the energy I gave to it just was not worth it - it was in the past and there was nothing I could do to change that - I could just change me - so I forgave them (in my head) and when I get the same feelings now I challenge them and try and work out what it was that set me off.
2007-03-10 18:01:22 · answer #5 · answered by angelica 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is possible to feel it long after the damage. I did and it took a long time to fight for myself. It makes you have low self esteem allowing people to run over you. You start to become a people pleaser and never do what you want to do! The good thing is that you know what and where the problem is and begains so you should be able to work through it fast. I reccomend a little therapy to talk it through.... Let it go and release it! Its not your problem anymore, but some stupid little kids. Good Luck!
2007-03-12 11:27:23 · answer #6 · answered by tressroy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I was horribly bullied in school. I can take at lot of criticism I seldom speak up for myself. That old saying that go's like this:"Sticks'n'Stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me!" Is about as far from the truth as it can be. Words can destroy a person self-esteem. But with hard work you can overcome.
2007-03-12 10:45:02 · answer #7 · answered by Pamela V 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i was bullied for a while in middle school. it was cruel and malicious, but ive moved on. i think it has effected me in a way, but not negatively. it made me a stronger person, and more confident. besides, the girls that bullied me amounted to nothing. i had a fabulous support system then, and it didnt hurt me too much.
2007-03-05 16:27:53 · answer #8 · answered by cookie_monster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear Christan mother told me to praise God for everything, which is hard to do after losing all my family. Friends. home and health .but faith is best. not worry or fear or the holding on of things that or long gone in the past ,give those thoughts & emotions to the Spirit of God is what I do and it takes them ,close your eyes and see it all being taken away by the holy spirit of God and it help you,if I have faith and love behind it.just let go, I know this is hard to do, I still cry about my mother dieing,and family dieing and all, but we must at least try to let go.I wish you the very best
2007-03-05 16:31:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes I still feel it and it has been far longer than 15 years.
2007-03-12 23:40:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not anymore. Once you come to accept who you are, then it does not matter what other people think of you. My family use to bully me saying i am too dark and that i need bleaching cream. I believe it and lived in years of misery. But when as soon as i learned to accept myself, suddenly my family complement me so much and say im pretty.
2007-03-05 16:34:46 · answer #11 · answered by surpassingangel 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋