i am not sure how to break it to her that i have my first boyfriend cuz then i kno she will want to like help me with everything in the relationship! i kno this because she does the same things with my friends too. if i want to go do somethin with 'em then she is like yes yes yes! she is involved in pretty much every aspect of my life. dont get me wrong, i love my mom and everything, but there are just those times. i feel bad about posting this question.
2007-03-05 07:56:52 · 31 answers · asked by : ) !@#$%^&* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
just ask her to let you make your own mistakes and for her to just be supportive and not smothering...
2007-03-05 08:00:50 · answer #1 · answered by Forlorn Hope - returned 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your Mom loves you very much and is very supportive. I totally understand what you are saying, though. Well, if you don't tell her about the boyfriend, she'll find out and be hurt that you didn't tell her, so I think you should tell her about the boyfriend. She won't be able to help herself on the "getting involved" part, so you should take it on a case-by-case basis. In other words, wait and see what happens and if she gets too involved in something you have going on with your boyfriend, like a dance for instance, then just talk to her about it and ask her if you can do "whatever" by yourself so you can learn how. Does that make sense? I don't think this is something you need to address with her "up front". Just tell her about the boyfriend and then address things as they come up. Good luck, and you are a very lucky girl.
2007-03-05 16:19:20 · answer #2 · answered by julesl68 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't feel bad. You are close to being a legal adult and have every right to your own life, ideas, and feelings. Tell your Mom about your first boyfriend and then tell her that you appreciate her love and all her advice but that you want to be able to live your own life, including making your own mistakes. A loving mother would want you to grow capable and independent. Tell that a mother gives her children two things - roots and wings. If the foundation is strong, the children will always return. Your mother should be proud that you are sprouting wings and showing signs of being able to fly from the nest. Ask her to be supportive, not smothering. Don't be afraid to be honest. If you let her continue to smother and control, it will just get worse as time goes on.
2007-03-05 16:03:29 · answer #3 · answered by friendlyadvice 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be grateful you have a mom that is so involved in your life! A lot of girls that are 14 & 15 and pregnant say its b/c they're mom didn't care what tey did. You should tell your mom! If he makes you happy, then tell her. And if he breaks your heart ( MOST guys, especially you're first LOVE will do this) than she'll be there 4 u wen u need her. Listen to her advice, but still make your own decisions.
2007-03-05 16:02:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you normally share everything with your mom and that is great...my daughter and I were very close tho I did not try to "run" everything. Still if you are close and she finds out later about this she will probably be hurt. Your first boyfriend is a VERY important time in your life and one I am sure your mom would want to be a part of...meaning sharing your joy and being there for you if times get rough...(hopefully all will be Joy..but) I think a girl needs her mom most at this time. Just talk to her like you do about everything else.
Good Luck
2007-03-05 16:04:18 · answer #5 · answered by healthynow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her straight up. She will feel happy that you told her. Although she is involved in every aspect in your life, she means well. Telling her is better than keeping it a secret and felling guilty for not telling her. She loves you, she just maybe feels like protecting you. She would do everything she can to help you. You might not want her help, but it is for the best. Plus, it's so much better than telling your dad.
2007-03-05 16:04:14 · answer #6 · answered by trisha d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i wouldnt tell her. u are allowed some privacy in your life. and if u need her help u can ask for it, without her forcing it on u with a big smile on her face. but if keeping it from her makes u feel guilty. then tell i her,"mom i want u to know that i have a boyfriend now and this relationship is private, i dont want u to be involved in it. its not a mean thing to say, moms can be manipulative. remember shes the adult and she already knows what is and isnt fair
2007-03-05 16:03:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
girl, i totally know how u feel. Most moms are like that, they think that they need to be involved in every aspect of their sons/daughters life. but that ain't true. you're old now and wise enough to make ur own decisions, and its ok if u ever make mistake because you can learn and grow on ur own, u dont need you're mom's decision in every single thing. try telling her that mom i appreciate the fact that u wanna be there for me and help me but you have to understand that i need to make my own decisions because i have to follow my heart and do what i need to do, it's ok if you help me sometimes but not always. So say something like that if u want, but dont worry, one day u will be on ur own and that's the time when u can take full control of your life. Right now it's still with parent involvment, i know, and it's cuz they love us but they have to accept the fact that we're getting older, we're not children any more, we can make mistakes!! Best of luck!!
2007-03-05 16:03:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should ask her not to tell you what to do. Just let her know if you need advise that she would be the first person you'll come to, even if it's not entirely true. She's your mom, she wants the best for you and she wants to be your best friend. And most of moms are like that. Your mom would be, well most likely, exited when you tell her that you got a boyfriend and you came straight to her to tell her.
2007-03-05 16:03:46 · answer #9 · answered by Nataliya 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your mom is trying to be your friend too. Be grateful she's interested, or at least you will be when you get older. My mom didn't show much interested when I was growing up, and it was great because I had my own space but now I have a hard time talking to her. Your mom will be there forever, your friends come and go.
2007-03-05 16:01:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really depends how old you are. But if your mature, then you should tell your mom and you want to start making your own decisions, and your own mistakes otherwise your always going to be depending on her to run your life. She needs to let go of you so you can know what you want in life. Try to explain, she'll understand, hopefully, but you won't know until you tell her something. Good Luck. *_*
2007-03-05 16:03:25 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋