Is it necessary & important that an individual MUST conform to society?

Question

I don't conform to society. I just be myself, & I don't bother or hurt anyone. People say that when I don't conform, others have a right to treat me like an alien from Mars. Then when I do try to conform to society, they say I'm trying to fit in the crowd for attention. I'm a 23-yr. old college grad. Why do I need to yearn for attention? I'm used to being a loner & I like it that way because no one can hurt my feelings. People are SO contradictory about things! I swear.

Answer 1

No, it is not only not necessary, it is not good to be over-conforming.
The nonconformists in the past 250 years of US history are the ones who made changes, made waves, made inventions and made the way for us to have better lives. Conformists just go along to get along. Poop, shower, shave, work, dinner, etc., all over again the next day. No need to question anything as long as they have physical comfort.
Just be true to yourself and expect the best; it will come to you.
Conformists are the ones who wake up at 45 y/old and wonder where the Hell their life went.
Good luck.

Answer 2

But you are conforming to society. You're using a computer, you're likely not naked or living in a tree or a dome or among wolves. There's 'cultural expectations' which have ranges among them. In the US at this time, there are relatively relaxed cultural expectations for clothing, although it might not seem like it - compare it to other cultures and time periods.

Part of conforming is in order to get the benefits of society. Humans are social animals (even the anti-social ones - I'm speaking from a long-term standpoint, not an individual one.) We queue up at the bank in the US because we know it is the best way to get the results we want. One does not fit into the crowd for attention, only approval that what behaviors we are doing just then are appropriate and we do it in order to get the results we want. There is acceptable non-conformity and non-acceptable non-conformity. Cultures do not accept some forms of non-conformity for various reasons and some are pointless, while others are not. Look into the concept of the 'social contract' - we make sacrifices ourselves for the sake of the community, which provides us with resources we will occasionally need (taxes for education, for instance, even if we do not have children, because education tends to decrease crime.) This works on a non-financial and more social level as well. (Gifts, for instance, aren't necessarily tangible - we are polite as a form of gift-giving, because politeness works in our favor socially.)

That you are asking this here implies to me that you are looking for some sort of acceptance in your 'non-conformity.' You said you went to college, but you must have bypassed the social sciences - this sort of thing is covered in psychology and anthropology, for instance.

Answer 3

We have to conform in some ways to exist in society. People should except you for who you are not for how much similar and familiar you are to them. All individualist face this problem. But, I find being an individual gets plenty of attention and interested friends.

Be yourself and live free people will respect you for it. Only the mindless drones will look at you like your from another world. I just look right back very quickly and most of the time they feel ashamed for staring like 5yr olds. Sometimes a wink or a wave can either get them to talk to you or ignore you. Each are beneficial results.

In well educated(not colleges in general) but, cities people are open to diversity and don't give you the deer in the head lights look. But, it'll happen and if you know how to handle it, it can be worth it.

Answer 4

You dont have to conform if you are wealthy or talented in some way that allows you independence. If you are poor, you are pretty much out of luck, because most societies no longer have places for people like that.

Answer 5

It is part of a bully tactic to get you part of the herd mentality, and if you don't they punish you in so many ways|

It is all for the sake of power and control for those on the top|


But if you try to fit in, that does not work either|

That is because consciously and unconsciously they know that you are a person of integrity - as it is impossible to hide what you really are, as you are continually communicating what you are all the time - and reject you because of that, because anyone who is part of a herd has given up his integrity to get the benefits of fitting in|





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Answer 6

there has to be a certain amount of conformity, otherwise society would be utterly chaotic and insane.

From a practical standpoint, you have to conform if you want to work for a decent company or conduct a successful business.

Answer 7

Sounds like a lot of 'blah blah' to me. I suggest doing what you want to do, as long as you're not infringing on anyone else's rights, or endangering yourself or others. It's true, people are contradictory about all kinds of things...and some can't handle change, some can't handle what's different...and some people are quick to judge others. You just have to think about what's important to you, and ignore a lot of what people have to say. There's a good chance they're saying something out of line because they're having a bad day or their cat died, or they're just bitter about something...You see what I'm saying.

Answer 8

im not sure i understand what you mean by not conform, if you mean that you do as you please, when you please and dont allow yourself to be influenced by societal or familial pressure, then good on you, if you mean non-conform as in blatantly disregard, rules, regulations and laws in order to be your own person then i say there is a problem, as inadequate as our legal system is, certain expectations of behaviour protect society and therefore really should be followed

Answer 9

You don't have to conform, but you better be independently wealthy first. If not, you will just be a bum.

Answer 10

No it isn't. GOD is in control of everything and has a plan for all of us. Trust in Him for everything, including your social life, and everything will go as it should.