Can anyone tell me why there is a trend of disrespectful kids and parents not doing their job?

Question

This question is coming fresh off some anger I have... I am a substitute teacher who used to love her job. Lately the kids have seemed more and more mouthy, with absolutely no respect for authority. Parents are not teaching their kids how to accept "no" for an answer, and kids don't even understand the most basic acceptable behavior. It's ridiculous. I couldn't believe some of the comebacks and comments I got this morning, after asking the students to do the simplest, most obvious things! It's not the teacher's job to raise kids, parents... YOU NEED TO DO IT. I can't wait until I have my own class next year. Some of this behavior will be absolutely unacceptable to me... and I will call the parents on it. Can't do that as a sub.

That's true... if the parents cared, their kids would already be respectful. I'll at least let them know that what may fly at home will not in my classroom. Hopefully!

What I'm saying is there are several years before kids begin school. I'm not talking about teenagers. Even the "good" ones have respect issues in adolescence. It IS the parents' job until they reach school age. At that point, that IS what teachers are doing... but with no support or care at home, why would the student listen to the teacher?

Answer 1

A sense of entitlement. That is what the children of today have that we as children never did. Parents are raising their children by giving them material possessions instead of love, and not expecting anything from them. Parents need to get involved in their children's lives, expect manners from them, and teach them to be the good human beings they deserve to be. This is definitely NOT a teacher problem, this is the parents.

Answer 2

I feel your pain, I'm a junior high teacher and deal with disrespectful kids on a daily basis...and it does kind of take away from the joy of teaching. I taught second grade last year and didn't really have these problems.

I think alot of it has to do with the student's home situation. Maybe they live with a single parent that has 2 jobs, or maybe there are two parents that are both working and are too tired to care when they get home from work...so they just let their kids do whatever and act however they want. I know when I was in junior high, I would've NEVER talked back to a teacher...but now it's a lot more common, and things have changed a lot since I was a student (my mom stayed at home and was always there when I got home from school...very uncommon by today's standards).

I'm sure it also has to do with what the kids watch on TV. With their parents working too much, and not providing guidance, a child can easily pick up bad behaviors and attitudes from watching TV.

I agree with you though...parents should do their job, and raise their child the right way. More often than not, I feel like a "mommy" to these kids...because it doesn't seem like anyone at home is giving them support regarding to how well they perform in school (or showing any interest for that matter).

Answer 3

I work as a substitute instructional aide; I was going to work as a substitute teacher, took the CBEST and all but then changed my mind. I just have memories of when I was in school through junior high school and when we would have a substitute. The kids just have a tendency to push it as far as they can get away with and I just did not want to be in those situations.

It should be much better when you have your own class; you will just have a few that are behavior problems on an ongoing basis. I think this world has become too impersonal to an extent because there are more people on our planet now and so many people have very poor ethics nowadays too. All you can do is the best you can, the behavior of some kids is so much a reflection of what they have learned from their family and friends and tv. Things really have deteriorated. The other day I worked with a boy in 5th grade and he had some anger issues with the world that really surprised me. I was still so innocent when I was in 5th grade. Remember when you have your own room you will have your own rules and the kids are going to need to follow them. Good luck. I mull it over often about going back to school to earn a teaching credential, it would take me one or two more years. Question is, can I handle the crap that comes with teaching. We'll see what I decide to do.

Answer 4

I just read an article about this in Parents magazine. That is my favorite!! My little girl is only 2 so I have time to make sure she learns acceptable behavior. The article was mostly talking about public behavior. I guess that would include the classroom. Well, the reason that was given in the article (which wasn't condoning or saying that it's a reasonable excuse) is that parents are so worried about hurting their childrens feelings these days. They don't want to damage their self-esteem or self-image so they don't want to tell them no...or at least not enforce it. I think that is sad and that children need to learn to be respectful of other people and not act like wild banchees in public. I do have some work to do with my daughter but, after reading this article I will work on it and not just let her grow up spoiled. Kids these days need a little more discipline.

Answer 5

Unfortunately, there are many parents who do not respect the schools and teachers. When this is the parents' attitude, there is no way for the child to feel differently. Also, parents expect teachers to do many "parenting" things for their children. They feel that, if a child is disrespectful to the teacher, it was probably justified or the teacher should be able to teach the child to act differently. I think it all comes down to a lack of respect and responsibility. It is sad for the parents who ARE doing their jobs because their children are missing out on things because of the time spent with children whose parents are NOT doing their jobs.

Answer 6

I believe it has to do with all of the new laws. Back in the day, children were raised by the community. Neighbors were able to discipline each others children as well as have them over for dinner uninvited. The laws are changing the way parents parent. Some parents are afraid to stand up and discipline. When I was a child what was said was the way it meant. I paid no bills, and had no right to an explanation it was simple because I said so. If I disobeyed I knew my consequences clearly. Things just arent the same with the laws and open media, two working parents etc

Answer 7

It isn't just in The US. I think it's everywhere. Kids are spoiled and irresponsible. They are rude to their parents and to each other; why should they act differently to teachers? They have no respect for authority because authority doesn't mean anything to them. It's simply a force for them to fight to get their own way.

They don't take "no" for an answer because no one says "no" to them and means it; everyone gives in - it's just easier. They get everything they want because their parents, for whatever misguided reason, think they deserve it. To them, the kids are angels. No parenting gets done because parents don't know how to parent. Kids don't know limits because no one gives them limits.

If you think having your own class next year will make a difference, think again. And you won't get much help from parents, either. They think it's YOUR job to raise THEIR kids. When their kids fail, you'll probably be blamed even though "Johnny" never bothered to open the bloody book or take notes all year. When they drop out, the parents will want to know what to do to get them back in school, begging you to please help them.

Where I live, kids are not supposed to fail, and teachers are required to do everything in their power, short of forcing the kids, to make sure the kids pass. The kids cannot repeat a grade/subject, so regardless of the outcome they will move up to the next level. There is no reason or incentive for them to be responsible or accountable - they will move up anyway.

Stay with subbing - the kids aren't yours for the year, no preps, no correcting, fewer frustrations, fewer headaches. Take long term replacements.Teach what you can when you can. Amen!

Answer 8

I agree with you.. it's not the teacher's job to be a parent...
my personal opinion is that everyone tries to be too politically correct and too concerned about everyone's rights nowadays ...
if kids know that the worst thing that can happen to them is to be suspended for a couple of days without any consequences at home... why should they care?
I think schools should have 'more meaningful punishments' than just to suspend a student, the kids don't learn much from that...

Answer 9

I am getting starting my Master's in Education next fall and I am concerned about the type of student I will be teaching. I am hoping to do some substituting next year and will have to see first hand how the kids are.
I wasn't a gem in school, but I knew when it was enough.
I have three boys and if they EVER are disrespectful to a teacher it will be the last time!

Answer 10

Parents are busy trying to live the "American Dream". Children do not spend time with their parents unless it is riding in the car from one extra-curricular activity to another. Even when at home parents are in one part of the house and children are in another. Many parents do not know how to parent, or they are afraid to parent, or they don't have the energy to parent after a long day at work. They take the path of least resistance which is to let the children do what they want to do. Other parents do not want their children to be angry with them, they want to be friends with them.

Society plays a role in that almost every program on television that targets young people shows adults as idiots. It glorifies the quick-witted, smart-mouth child who shows respect to no one. Parents are shown as ineffectual wimps or abusive monsters, both whom are outsmarted by their children by the end of the program. Teachers are shown as deranged egomaniacs who may or may not be sexual preditors.

Finally, the education process has been so concerned about building self-esteem and making children feel important, that they have failed to teach them boundaries and common courtesy and respect for others. It is the result of the "me" generation. Student's interrupt, call each other names, make unsolicited comments, chatter unchecked, try to entertain their classmates, destroy materials and property, steal, cheat, lie without hesitation and feel they have every right to do so.