I am 26 years old, have a degree, happy childhood, a few good friends and a lovely boyfriend...but I am very shy!! Whenever someone talks to me (stranger or friend), I start blushing and cannot really talk. I don't know if I have a low self-esteem, I do look good on the outside and I am a friendly person, but I cant just talk to people. Please help, what is wrong with me?
2007-03-05 07:16:39 · 6 answers · asked by NiceGirl 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Start off small. You interact with people all day long already, without even realizing it. Take these areas you're used to and practice becoming more confident in speech. When ordering a coffee at Starbusks, spend a few extra seconds truly saying hello to the cashier and asking how they are doing. Practice eye contact with everyone. Comopliment a stranger in line on the shirt. This will slowly help you in becoming accustomed to speaking to strangers, and then you can transfer it to other areas of your life.
2007-03-05 07:24:03 · answer #1 · answered by Samanamantha 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you sound alot like me! it is annoying and frustrating isn't it?!!
When i was little i clung to mum or dads leg at parties and it wasn't until i went to uni I started to become more comfortable talking to new people and could actually go out somewhere by myself (like shopping) without feeling so shy and embarrassed!
I am still shockingly shy and i think this is more of an add-on to your question than an actual helpful answer because I am interested in finding out what is so wrong with me also!!
I am quiet at work and can easily babble for hrs to people i feel comfortable around but when it comes to groups or people i don't know, i am really quiet and just listen and not know what to say.
To me, i know my issue is low confidence. I am not unattractive and people say i am nice looking and don't have anything to worry about and I'm generally happy with the way i look and am but low self-esteem can play a big part in how comfortable we act around others. I did answer a similar question a few weeks back and unfortunately I have just accepted than I am and will always be shy and experience helps you combat shyness (ie when i started working at 17 i felt more confident and now i'm living in a new town and i'm single so more independent compared to 5 years ago). If you feel uncomfortable, try going out and joining a new clubor meeting new people and while it will be hard at first, you'll come out of your shell and realise people aren't judging you. I have come to the realisation that most people aren't and even though I blush i can kinda talk myself out of feeling shy and embarrassed.
Sorry for long answer and all the best!!
2007-03-05 15:29:23 · answer #2 · answered by ppl_tell_me_im_insane 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm shy too. I think it helps if I just remind myself that the other people are just people too. They aren't any better than me. Nor will they crucify me if I am not the most entertaining person in existance. It helps to interact with people as much as possible. I like to play games online, so I can interact with people without risking too much. It's like practice. The more you interact with people, the easier it will become. Best of luck. And remember to =0)
2007-03-05 15:34:23 · answer #3 · answered by Stormy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nothing's wrong with you. You do not have low self-esteem. Please stop labeling yourself.
You just feel self-conscious. Everybody does sometimes.
Have you ever heard the expression, "what you resists, persists"? When you feel self-conscious, you fight against the feeling (you don't want to feel it) and therefore it persists. Your feelings (emotions) are just energy moving through your body. When you push against them, they get stuck in your body. What you feel is just years of stuck emotions. Learn to release your emotions and you won't feel so self conscious.
Two good ways to learn to release your emotions are by leanring 1) "The Sedona Method" by Hale Dwoskin. Dwoskin teaches you how to go into your emotions and release them. You can learn by book or cassettes/cd's.
Or learn to use 2) EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) or Emotional Tapping. EFT is very easy to learn (learn in about 15-30 minutes) and easy to apply. You can use it anytime, anywhere for any emotional issue. Please download the FREE EFT Manual from the EFT website (www.emofree.com).
2007-03-05 15:29:34 · answer #4 · answered by dragonsong 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
See your doctor. You may have social anxiety disorder. There's medication that can help.
2007-03-05 15:25:12 · answer #5 · answered by diannegoodwin@sbcglobal.net 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You got a boyfriend, so don't worry about it.
2007-03-05 15:24:32 · answer #6 · answered by Mighty C 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋