i am married and my husband says i need to stay at home more than visting my mother and he also says i need to

Question

he says i need to make hime first than my mother and he says im his property and he can come get me any time and go home and there is nothing i can do tell me what you think

Answer 1

"Property"?? Sorry, but marriage is a joint venture, not a sole ownership.

I think your husband is way too demanding and living in la la land.

Answer 2

There is no question that he is limiting your association with people that love, accept and have influence over you.
Abusive men use this means to isolate and control their victims so your only source of support, understanding and knowlege comes from them. They do this until the point you lose yourself entirely and what you think is right, what you want and how you should be treated takes a back seat to what they want.
Your mother may object to his mistreatment
of you or try an tell you differently about how a loving relationship is dealt with and that poses a risk to him of losing you. Knowing this, he is trying his best to get rid of this good advice and sound relationship for his own benefit.
Fight to keep your mother in your life as long as she is a good influence (doesn't drink, do drugs or get you to do likewise or is abusive herself). If that doesn't work I would seriously consider conselling for the both of you. If he refuses then there is nothing else you can do but walk away BEFORE it's too late and he has you convinced that only he can love you. You deserve to have whatever healthy relationships you want and it sounds to me like he is displaying some key warning signs of what may lie ahead, as these types of relationships once all the "outside" people have been eliminated, usually turn to verbal or physical abuse.
This kind of marriage breaks the rules of having to stay together as it poses dangers to you mentally, emotionally and physically.

Answer 3

I have heard that when you are married your spouse is often suppose to come first as you are life partners so that is considerable but as far as being controlling over a wife that is completely unacceptable although you are legally bound to each other you are not personal property you don't pay taxes on each other so therefore everyone is an individual not property try discussing the issues you have with your husband on his meaning of marriage and express your views as well try not to make it an argument and suggestively explain to him how these actions make you feel as a person.

Answer 4

Just because your married to him doesn't make you his personal property. He sounds like and immature control freak. And now he's trying to keep you from your family. You need to get him to marriage counsling to make him understand your not a piece of property but his wife in an equal relationship. If that doesn't work then you need to figure out what to do because guys like that only get worse and if they feel like they're losing control they tend to get violent to get their way. Trust me, I've been through this myself with my exboyfriend and it did get violent. First he started isolating me from my friends and family. He told me he didn't want no one over the house when he was at work, not even my mother. Then he said I couldn't leave the house when he was at work. If I needed to go to the store I had to wait for him to come home from work so he could go with me. I wasn't allowed to go alone or with my sister, mother or friends. It was like living in a prison. Before it gets to that point try to talk to him about it and let him know how it makes you feel. If he doesn't care about your feelings then you'll know it's all about him and his needs and maybe he needs some help with some personal issues. What ever you do, don't let it get any worse. Good luck.

Answer 5

Once u marry u put ur husband first of all things except God, the same goes for him. Maybe his wording of you being his personel property is not correct. You share a common ground. Maybe u need to talk to your husband and set dates with your mother to spend time with her. But when u marry u become as one. You may not want to hear this (sorry) but it is true. You became his responsibilty once u said I DO. Never stop loving ur mother and spending time with, just spend more time with your husband and home. Then again have to ask your self what are u running from?

Answer 6

Whoa you better tell him whats up girl, you are no ones property. Marriage is not about that. If you don't want to fly into a divorce now is the time to tell him that kind of thinking is very pocessive and very unhealthy. Your mom raised you, not him. So if your mom needs you be there. If your husband can't handle that you have serious issues. You put him first when you want to he cannot demand things out of you. This sounds very wrong do something before it gets worse show him he cannot control you. Wish you the best.

Answer 7

First, there are going to be some that are going to think that you are a little wierd (the property bit) but i know that in a few CHRISTIAN branches, there is this property thing regarding wives.

He does make a valid point about you and your mother. You SHOULD make him come first, as should he you. Unless your mother is sick, you really need to re-think this aspect of your marriage.

As for the property part..........you know the answer to that one already.

Answer 8

First of all you are not property and he does not have the right to tell you what to do and when to do it. I do agree that you should spend time with him and at times put him before your family but he should not make you choose. You need to tell him that you are not his property and if he wants you to spend more time at home then he needs to sit down with you and talk about it like a civilized human being. If that doesnt work then you need to reevaluate your marriage and if its right for you.

Answer 9

i think of it is going to likely be the make sure that has the backside earnings that stayed at abode to advance the youngsters! Which in maximum families it may be the mummy! some couples nonetheless won't be able to arise with the money for to try this nevertheless whether they have been given a "extensive tax credit." i'm fortunate sufficient that my substantial different earns extra advantageous than sufficient so i'm able to stay at abode - i visit be getting Maternity pay from my paintings for 9 months and then I plan to stay at abode for yet another 3 months and then bypass back to paintings area time (in simple terms some hours each and every week) - As i think of this could help as going back to paintings after been a stay at abode mom for 5 years could be puzzling going - so i think of it could be extra effective to proceed working some hours each and every week. My newborn would be at my mothers or my companions mothers on the same time as i'm working so i does no longer could desire to pay for childcare like maximum folk!

Answer 10

I am the Mother of 5 happily married children.
We raised our children to be independent and responsible.
Once they got married, they established their own homes and life styles.
They come to visit us, sometimes together,sometimes alone and not to often.
We are there for each other in emergencies.
God intended for a couple to become as one.
Yes, your husband is now suppose to be your top priority.~~

Sounds to me like you have not cut the apron strings yet, and that is causing you to have a husband that is not happy. In fact, I think he is angry about it, and that's why he said what he did to you.~~~If you don't want to get off on the wrong foot with your marriage, open your heart to your husband and keep communication open. I don't think he is trying to set boundaries, he just wants you to concentrate more on being a wife and making your place together a home.
I hope I have helped you understand his position.
I think your Mother would understand what I'm saying~~~~~Jill
Good luck to you both and may God bless your future together~

Answer 11

You aren't his property any more than he is yours.

I am not going to waste a bunch of your time, your husband is a jerk and a coward and a baby. ump him. Move in with your mom and file for divorce. This guy is bad news from the start and you need to call your marriage a mistake and move on with your life.

When you meet a man worthy of your heart you will want to put him first and your mom will be happy for you.