I'm in a committed relationship, but have recently found a very good friend from my past. We were only friends in the past, but since I've been chatting it up with him (and other friends we've both recently found) I feel like I can't stop thinking about him, and what might have been.
I love my man, and wouldn't cheat, but the feelings are extremely uncomfortable. I need to know if other people have also felt this way, and how they got over it. I have decided to stop chatting with him until I have this under control.
I'm looking for experience as well as advice. Thanks to all for your answers!
2007-03-05 05:55:53 · 11 answers · asked by Nikki 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You're smart in not talking with him until you have your feelings under control. First you need to ask yourself why you are attracted to this person. Is his personality that different from your boyfriend? Does he give you needed attention? What attracted you to your boyfriend? You need to sit and think about your relationship with your b/f and ask yourself if it's really worth the risk to get even emotionally involved with this other person. Fantasies are one thing and are acceptable as long as you don't cross that line. If and when you decide you want to end your relationship with your b/f only then will it be okay for you to attempt anything with your friend. You owe that to both your b/f and yourself.
2007-03-05 06:14:42 · answer #1 · answered by 2Beagles 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This happens to a lot of people, me included. You say you recently have reacquainted with your friend, which leads me to think that you keep thinking about him, etc because he's "new". Just like how when your friend gets a new car, you might feel a really strong urge to look at new cars too. You should get over any "special" feelings in a not too long period of time. I'd recommend talking to the person in question again, because due to your closeness and attachment you can solidify that into a lasting and rock solid friendship, and nothing beats having a friend who would do anything for you!
2007-03-05 06:04:01 · answer #2 · answered by RTO! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been there and I have to believe that this is normal. Keep in mind that since you are not with that guy, you could be putting him on a bit of a pedestal. If you were actually with him, you might find that he irritates you and there's a good reason why you were only just friends. That being said, keep your relationship with him light. Never do or say anything that you wouldn't want your boyfriend to know about or that you wouldn't want him to do with one of his female friends.
These kinds of things will always come and go. If you don't let it destroy your relationship, you'll probably find that it has strengthened it.
2007-03-05 06:03:30 · answer #3 · answered by BelleDandy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay away from anyone who may make you feel this way. Its not fair to your b/f. Dont let this grow and get between you and your b/f - If you ever decide to leave your b/f, let it be because of something (bad) he did to you, or something (bad) about his personality that he just wont change, but not something like this.
2007-03-05 06:47:21 · answer #4 · answered by Java Chip 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can be friends with the friend of yours from the past and still be in a relationship with your husband.
2007-03-05 06:02:38 · answer #5 · answered by Heidi T 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have made the first and best choose to stop chatting with him and foucs on your man now , Good Luck!!!
2007-03-05 06:01:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe it's normal, it's new and kind of exciting. Your doing the right thing by cutting it off until you can control your feelings.
2007-03-05 05:59:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could Love Him by way of Your exhibit exhibit yet In individual it must be Completley distinctive, human beings may be Decieving by way of A exhibit they could scouse borrow pictures with the intention to attraction to "Bettah looking human beings" Dont fool Urself With This Boy/guy/guy. I Dont have faith you could Love somebody by way of A exhibit! & i think of you already understand That.
2016-10-02 10:29:27 · answer #8 · answered by higgs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's most definitely normal to feel that way
I know it's difficult in your situation because you're in a committed relationship
maybe you should spend less time with the other man and spend more quality time with your man and realize how important he is to you
2007-03-05 05:59:56 · answer #9 · answered by Ocean Love 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if you love your man.... love him.... be friend with your other man... but control your feelings... its the best thing you will do.
2007-03-05 06:06:47 · answer #10 · answered by anastasia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋