2007-03-05 05:28:34 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No one here can help you or your parents resolve this issue. They have to choose to do it themselves. What you can do is let them know how the arguing is affecting you and remind them that you are learning from them. Tell them that it wouldn't hurt to get into marriage or family counseling so you can all learn ways to resolve issues between each other rather than arguing and bickering.
2007-03-05 05:37:16 · answer #1 · answered by Laura Renee 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am going to answer this from a parents point of view. My husband and I have been married for 29 years - since we were in 11th grade. We consider each other soul partners and love each other beyond description. Some days it still feels more like infatuation we are so in to each other. We frequently "argue' about who loves who more. "I love you more". No, I love you more." Anyway, I wanted to make that point first. Now, we have three grown daughters (28, 26, and 21) and two little boys ages 7 and 4. Sometimes they make comments that "all we ever do is fight". What they are talking about we do not even consider fighting. We have always been this way going back and forth and back again about whatever the issue is. To us, it is NOT arguing! I agree with a couple others here who said it's a way of communication.
2007-03-05 05:54:50 · answer #2 · answered by mamabear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be happy that you won't have to live with them for the rest of your life. Some people just enjoy having drama in their life or they have never learned how to communicate without arguing. I am sure they do know that the arguing gets you upset and if that is so, telling them would not help. So just learn to see it as their problem and don't let them get you upset. Even though people do disagree in a marriage at times, there is no reason to be arguing like that all the time. Just make sure that when you get married in the future you don't copy their bad habits. I'm glad that at least you realize that there must be more to a happy marriage.
2007-03-05 06:36:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can tell you it is normal for parents to argue. If your parents NEVER argued, it would be a bit unusual. Some parents hide their fighting very well and only do it late at night when everyone is in bed. As long as their fights are not physical then there really isn't anything you do. I've known a lot of couples and every single one of them fight at least a little.
However, if it bothers you, you need to TELL them. Maybe they will feel bad and tone things down. Perhaps they will settle their arguments later when you aren't around. I think that would be a good idea. If they know it bothers you, they might try to work on fixing it.
2007-03-05 06:10:45 · answer #4 · answered by yomama23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is just how some people communicate. My parents do it and they have been together over 40 years. It drives me mad but it works for them.
Try talking to your parents and asking them if they even realise they do this, they may not. Do you think it bothers them that they are arguing over silly things? If it does then encourage them to seek professional help, you won't be able to help them because you are too close. If it doesn't bother them then you'll just have to try and bear with it - only a few more years till you can get away!
2007-03-05 05:40:03 · answer #5 · answered by Leapling 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've seen couples like that over the years that have what I would call "Healthy Friction" and they would argue about petty things all the time, yet, they were the ones that stayed married for 30-50 years.
I wouldn't worry about it. It probably adds spice to their marriage and is a important part of their dynamics.
2007-03-05 05:46:36 · answer #6 · answered by The Sylvan Wizard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a problem the sames as yours. So me and the wife sat down and had a chat about it and came up with a Safe word "STOP" so when one of us said it we would walk away form the arguement. we also agreed never to go to bed still arguing. The making up was great
2007-03-05 05:38:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Johnny
Firstly you need to let your parents no that you are aware of their arguing.
And secondly you need to sit down with them and tell them how this makes you feel and that it hurts you to hear them argue.
And thirdly maybe when they argue in front of you, you should say I cant listen to this anymore your like two children, that should make then stop and think.
Good luck
2007-03-05 05:38:23 · answer #8 · answered by pixie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please let your parents know how this behavior is affecting you. Find a good time to approach them, either individually or when they are together. Let them know you have something very important that you need to tell them. They may not even be aware of this behavior. Unless you tell them it is bothering you as it is, they won't know that either. If it continues, perhaps you could go to talk with a guidance counselor at your school. I doubt that will be necessary. Loving people care about how their loved ones feel. Good luck.
2007-03-05 05:35:59 · answer #9 · answered by May King 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's ok if they argue, it doesn't mean that they don't love each other and you said it yourself.
Arguing sometimes makes the relationship stronger cuz it's a kind of communication.
2007-03-05 05:35:09 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋