HELP 20 week old baby won't sleep what do I do?!?

Question

My breast-fed baby won't sleep for longer than 2 hours. He is a healthy weight (over 17lbs) and the health visitor suggested starting weaning him as he's showing all the signs of needing more than milk. I give him about 100mls breastmilk mixed with baby rice in the evening, but it hasn't helped. He usually won't finish all of it. Should I feed him some during the day too? Also, when he wakes up, I try to comfort him, and he falls asleep in my arms, then when I put him down he wakes up again, and then won't settle until I've fed him. That's sometimes 1/2 hour after he last did it! He has never been a good sleeper and the best it has ever been is 2 weeks over Christmas when he slept at midnight and woke at 4 then 8. That was manageable but this is seriously making me down, I feel so useless and tired. Please help!!! Do I need to be more fascist!?

Answer 1

Hi, sounds like your having a rough time! I know exactly how you feel!!!!!!!!
My baby girl is 9 months (also have 6yr old) and we had the same problems up until I started baby whisperer book when she was 4 months and ever since she sleeps 7pm - 8am!!!!!! (shes snoring now!)
Does your baby have a dummy???? Ours did and she kept waking up when it fell out so we took it away (cruel i know! But it was the best thing we ever did!!!) Get the baby whisperer book it has fantastic tips and ways to get your baby to sleep independantly without being unkind and leaving him to cry as some books suggest!

BW has a routine wher you continiously pick up your baby from the cot when he cries and put back down when settled and the pick up again when crying, no rocking or jiggling just slight back patting or hushing, no eye contact also. This make take up to 1hr for him to go to sleep the first time but it does work and it isnt like controlled crying where you have to leave him and listen to him crying because you are right there with him the whole time!!!

After doing this everytime he wakes in his cot he will get the message after 2 days or so (at his age - takes longer older they get!) and from this he will learn to go to sleep by himself without your help!!!

I promise it is hard but it works! My baby is so good at getting her self to sleep since we "taught her" I just put her in her cot at night wide awake and she goes straight to sleep by herself!!!!

www.babywhisperer.com is the website to go with the book, it has forums where you can get the complete routine with help too!!!!!

Your baby has just got used to using being fed to get him to sleep and you can teach him another way it will just take perserverence but I promise, absolutley promise it works!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also no matter how much solid food you introduce it wont make a difference if his problem is that he cant get himself to sleep by himself, feed him food when you think he IS ready no because you think it will help him sleep!!!! If hes never been a good sleeper then it doesnt sound to me like his problem is not enough food. I tried giving solids to my daughter to get her to sleep better and honestly it didnt work! As soon as we took dummy away and did baby whisperer "pick up put down" it worked and we have never looked back!!!!

Good Luck

HTH
Danielle

Answer 2

You are so so lucky!! My daughter at this age wouldn't sleep for more than 20 minutes unless in the car or at night. There is nothing wrong but you may want to look into the Baby Whisperer routines just to give yourself the feeling that your following a recommended routine. She suggests feeds every 3 hours at this age followed by some activity and putting down for naps when baby seems sleepy. Also having a 12 hour night and 12 hour day. Following a routine will help your baby sleep through the night and then you can get most of that sleep happening when you want to sleep! Just remember that every baby is different.

Answer 3

20 Week Old Baby Sleep

Answer 4

Okay, I'm not a specialist or anything, but I have a 7 week old girl who sleeps appx. 5 to 6 hours at night, but (I know you may not like what I have to say) you may have to let him cry a bit to settle himself down (a bit of a fascist.) He's using the nipple as a sleep prop to help him relax to sleep and the warmth of your body. He just needs to get used to being on his own, it's difficult I know. When I was training my little one to be on her own-I would get a watch and sit where I could see her and just time it and see how long she cries, of course, if she became too fretful for more than 5 minutes, I would pick her up to comfort her and put her down again (I was also mindful of my own emotions, reassuring myself that she was okay, etc.) The baby is a healthy weight, so the food issue may not be concern here-again not a specialist here, just trying my best like you as a first time parent. Good luck!

Answer 5

At 20 weeks and over 17lb i think your baby is really hungry , he needs more solids during the day now .. I know the new rule for weaning is 6 months but that has to be impossible ! Try him with some baby fromage frias , pureed fruit and whatever else can be blended for him .. Just little drops . I am positive you will notice a difference ..

Good Luck x

Answer 6

a baby is ready for weaning from 16 weeks and i'd guess yours could do with it!! i had my son sleeping thru from 6 weeks and there is no reason why other babies can't do it.
you need to start controlled crying along side the weaning. it'll take 3 days and will break your heart, but babies (as you are now experiencing) learn very quickly what makes mum come running..
mail me if you want more info as it's a longish mail but i swear it wil work for you, but def get baby on solids now.

Answer 7

What were the 'signs' that he was ready for solids? Cereal is junk and really bad for breastfed infants.

Other than that, my advice is: get used to it. reevaluate your expectations and settle in for the long haul.

My son is 14 months and just started sleeping more than 2 hours about a month ago (it is still hit or miss though.. sometimes he will go 3 hours, every once in a while 5 hours)

We co-sleep... i don't know how i would have stayed sane without it.

Have you tried bringing him to your bed when he wakes up?

Answer 8

i must first of all say well done for breastfeeding for this long i think i lasted 9 weeks still better than nothing but i know from experience(i got 5 kids now smallest 10 weeks old) that babies do tend to settle better when they are weaned. my sister in law has a baby food book and she sent me file of recipes for up to 6 months and pretty soon i will be putting me youngest on these foods. there are all sorts of recipes in the book and many can be frozen too for use later on in the week so put him on solids if he will take them and best of luck yeah!!!! if u want recipes let me know contains pureed stuff

Answer 9

You are NOT useless.
Just TIRED!

You need to make a plan and stick to it.

It sounds like your baby is VERY hungry. I weaned mine at 16 weeks, and they needed it then.

Get a good book on weaning, and start going for it properly. Annabelle Karmel does a good one. http://www.annabelkarmel.com/

If you really get to your wits end, start introducing formula, they do a hungry baby version. You have breastfed your baby for nearly 5 months, you have done a really great job!

It's better for your baby to bottle fed than for you to have a breakdown.

Answer 10

If you want to put your baby to sleep in 20 seconds you must get the "Instant Baby Sleep" MP3 sound track. Here is their official web-site: http://www.instantbabysleep.net

The sound track gently produces energy over the full human hearing spectrum with an embedded pulse that gently eases the brain to the Alpha state well known for drowsiness and sleep induction.

Answer 11

ok, ive never had children, but my mum always had me and my sisters in a routine when we were babies. she used to feed us and put us straight to sleep. then if we cried she'd leave us for 5 -10 mins hopefully he should soothe himself to sleep, but if he doesnt go to his cot and rub his tummy of something but DONT turn the light on as this will not help him get to sleep. keep him in a regular routine all day and he'll soon get into a good sleeping pattern, also if he wakes up and cries and you have to go in talk quitely, dont pick him up just talk to him soothingly, and he'll eventually fall asleep,making noise will distrupt him so be as quite as you can when soothing him.i dont know how long babies have to sleep for during the day etc, but make sure you wake him up or whatever at a regular time all the time (does that make sense) if you feed him during the night, try doing it in the dark so he will fall straight bsck to sleep again (hopefully)
i hope this helps, i know ive not got kids but my lil sister was a baby not that long ago, and i can remember my mum keeping her in a pattern and feeding her in the dark, so she wouldnt fully wake up, although apparently she was a good baby!
good luck xx