how do i tell my wife i am actually a closet homosexual?

Answer 1

I’m really sorry to hear about your problem. I don’t think there is an easy way to tell her, it’s just one of those things you’ll have to brave out. No matter how you dress it up, it’s still going to come out the say way. I’m a gay guy and years ago I worried about how to tell my family. I chickened out and didn’t tell them anything. The first they knew was when I said me and my “friend” were moving in together. You’re in a different position because you’re married and there’s another person involved.

You need to prepare yourself for her reaction and have answers ready for the questions she’s going to ask. If I was your wife and you told me, I’d ask you:
1. how long have you known this.
2. did you feel that way when we got married.
3. have you slept with another man and have you done this while you’ve been married.

I’m sure she’d ask other things, but that’s the main ones that would come to my mind. You also have to prepare yourself for all the other fallout. She’s going to be on the phone to her own family giving them the news. Your family are going to find out and that’s another thing you’ll have you face. She could ask you to move out or she could walk out on you.

When you’ve built up the courage, I would just sit her down and tell her. It’s not going to be a nice thing to do, but at the end of the day it will be worth it. Dealing with this crap at the moment is the hard part, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Do you have any gay friends, ones you can chat with when things get bad? I’m sure your wife will get a lot of support, but you also need support for yourself. If you ever need anyone to chat with, you can always click on my e-mail link in my profile. I hope everything works out for you, best of luck.

Answer 2

First and foremost you have to be prepared for the emotional fallout, which likely will be considerable. If you are serious you should tell her that you have been thinking about your thoughts and feelings for along time and have come to the realization that you are a homosexual. That is nothing that she, or your parents or anyone else did, it is simply a fact of nature. Up to now you've been able to supress these fellings, or acted out in secret, and to be fair to her and yourself you must face this reality. Assure her you are not telling her this to hurt her, but to help her understand why the intimacy in your relationship has changed. Tell her you still love her (if you do), but you are interested in men in a sexual way as well as want to have a true intimate realtionship with another man. Good Luck.

Answer 3

Hey, Im sorry your in such a dilema. Im only a teen (So of course ive never been married) but i guess ill tell you what i think. Well, first of all, i think you need to be honest to her. She is your wife after all and im sure that youve loved her at one point. But think how much youll hurt her if youre not honest. Then youll be living a lie. I think she deserves to know and shell probabley understand. Its not youre fault you didnt choose this so its not like youre being untrue to her. Just go with your heart. hope i helped. Goodluck and best of wishes. love, Me.

Answer 4

a foul previous experience could desire to be difficult even if it rather is not any excuse for attacking your son. Her ex-husband replace right into a dishonest asshole however the reality he cheated with yet another guy somewhat makes no difference. your doorstep son did no longer ask to be gay, he merely is an he's embracing who he somewhat is that's great. If I have been on your place i may be giving my spouse a extreme lecture on why she desires to give up being one among those b*tch, he's her son, her flesh and blood, he had no longer something to do with what took place to her final marriage and making it look that way (that's somewhat what she's doing) with the help of associating them because of the fact he's gay is ill and incorrect. that's a superb theory to get him to pass out for a on a similar time as and enable her cool down yet to be honest if I have been him of by no potential talk to her back, it rather is merely an inexcusable reaction, completely I justified and entirely unfair. What you're able to do approximately it i do no longer somewhat recognize, I have no theory what style of criminal rights you have because of the fact the step father yet there could desire to be some surprisingly in case you and your spouse very own the domicile collectively and share the charges etc.. merely start up with the help of calming her down and attempting to get her to work out that she is carefully interior the incorrect, she could desire to be helping her son in his determination, no longer laying the breakdown of he first marriage at his feet Xx

Answer 5

Are there children involved in your marriage? Are you worried she'd be hateful and prejudice? If you answered yes to either of these, I say you don't tell her you're gay, but you do tell her you want a divorce and then you break to her after the court preceedings have been completed. If you believe she'll be gracious about the process then just be honest. You need to be honest to be happy.

Answer 6

Well, how do you think she will take it? You'd need to decide for yourself if it'd be better to tell her now, or divorce her then tell her, or even not tell her at all. Living a lie is an awful way to live, though.

Answer 7

Good question, been thinking the same thing. I would tell her and get along with your life. Of course I am too afraid to do what I recommend.

Answer 8

Wow. Carefully.

Answer 9

Make sure you break it to her when she doesn't have a lot on her plate (ie work, maybe kids, or family issues)

Answer 10

the truth shall set you free. its not fair to her not to tell her, if she loves you then she will eventually forgive your lies. and yes not telling her was the same as lying to her.