My sister is 17 and is engaged to a 21 year old, he smokes and drinks occasionaly but is really sweet and they are in love. I know parents only want the best for their children but why are they against her marrying who she loves? and am I wrong to be happy for her when it's against my parent wishes?
2007-03-05 03:17:05 · 9 answers · asked by sassy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She isn't planning on going to colledge she wants to be a truck driver and he is going to truck school right now so they can be a partership truck driver...so her future is what she wants...they (parents) have never approved of female truckers and think it's a form of rebellion
2007-03-05 03:32:36 · update #1
You can think for yourself, you are allowed to have your own likes, dislikes, and opinions. You can be happy for your sister, and she probably appreciates this.
As far as asking us "Why do my parents not want my sister to get married"? Not to be crude, but, ........ask them! How the hell could we know?
I however as a parent would be against it as I would want my daughter to be older and encourage her to pursue her dreams and either college or a career as love and marriage there is plenty of time for.
If she marries this young and then gets strapped down with children and has little to no education and the marriage fails or the guy ends up being a real loser, I would be crushed to see one of my babies destined to misery, mediocrity, and possibly a life of Trailer Trash hell. This may be what your parents are thinking. I can only assume.
You and your sister may be excited with the notion of marriage by exclusively thinking about the "Wedding" and wedding day, and all the picking out of many different dynamics of having a sensational ceremony with flowers, invitations, dresses, cakes, etc. , but, too many people forget about the days, weeks, months, and years after the wedding day. They are not prepared, and marriage takes work and it isn't "the in thing to do".
You may have already been chosen as Maid of Honor, or a Bridesmaid and your sister may have already entertained the idea and shared with you and wants you involved in helping her plan the wedding, but, if you stood back and really looked at it objectively as a loving sister,.....you might see you are caught up with the idea of this one day event, and aren't looking at your sister's total life picture.
Try doing that for a few days, and you might change your tune also. I would hope that my other daughters would help paint a reality picture for the one that is thinking of marriage and is only 17. I don't want to drop dead thinking any of my kids didn't get to enjoy their youthful years and build a foundation for marriage.
Picture your sister the next time you are in a store and see a gal whom looks all of 20 years old with 3 kids and no man with her and her eyes look like they are 40. It's all too common, and too many jovial hearted young gals and wannabe young husbands have big ideas but, no plan except one for failure and misery.
2007-03-05 03:38:50 · answer #1 · answered by The Sylvan Wizard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because your parents know that what you think you want at 17 isn't always what you want when you get older.
Being a truck driver and being with this guy may be her goal now, but as she gets older she may change her mind and then she will be stuck.
I wanted to not go to college and just work and move in with my boyfriend. My parents made me go to college. I am so glad I did. I am still with the guy, but I finally figured out for sure what I want to do as a career and will be able to support myself if we got divorced. Parents worry about that too.
2007-03-05 03:51:42 · answer #2 · answered by Tearful25 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you said your parents only want the best for your sister. Ummm...Maybe they are afraid that they will lose their daughter. And I don't think that they like the fact that their 17 year old daughter is getting married to a man over 18.
2007-03-05 04:11:01 · answer #3 · answered by jamaicanbeauty136 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are probably against it because they know love isn't enough to make a good marriage. Your sister is too young, and hasn't finished her education. Plus, this guy is 21. He is a legal adult, your sister isn't. Your sister should listen to your parents. This is a bad idea.
2007-03-05 03:22:46 · answer #4 · answered by Tiss 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Probably because they think she is too young. These days the appropriate age is around 22 or so after they graduate college and can support a family financially.
2007-03-05 03:21:32 · answer #5 · answered by sexypanty07 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is she still planning on going to college? They may just be upset that she isn't furthering her schooling.
Be happy for your sister.
2007-03-05 03:23:40 · answer #6 · answered by Jo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be happy for your sister. If your parents arent happy for her then thats their fault, and your sister needs family to support her. Even if your parents get mad at you and think your going against them, dont let that change how happy you are for your sister.
2007-03-05 03:20:18 · answer #7 · answered by Encouragement 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
They are probably thinking she's too young to get married just yet. 17 IS a little young.
2007-03-05 03:25:42 · answer #8 · answered by kj 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Because she is SEVENTEEN and that is too young / immature to make a decision that is supposed to last for a LIFETIME. Chances are they are not "in love", but "in LUST".
So here's the test: If they are TRULY in love, see if he'll wait for her for at least two years.
2007-03-05 03:21:55 · answer #9 · answered by Romans 8:28 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋