You have just ended a long serious relationship or a divorce, how do you get over it?

Question

i have been in an almost 6 years relationship when we got engaged every thing just didn't go as planned, and sadly ended i am having trouble getting over her it's been a year whenever i remember stuff or things i get depressed,
how do you get over this with out doing some thing stupid?

Answer 1

make an arrangement to go out with all ur single male friends , have a drink flirt with girls and just think to your self, or u might already or just then realise it 'LOOK WHAT IVE BEEN MISSING OUT ON!' trust me just try to think to yourself life is life it didnt work out hello 2007! you might still be upset but your friends will know to cheer you up have competitions who kisses the most girls , play hard to get it is fun, i did this with a number of ex boyfriends so im only hinting you, dance round your house naked ! then when you sit down you think to yourself...( what am i doin!) then you'll most likley to laugh, when those things about ur ex gets in your head just smile and think to yourself o well didnt work out !, life is worth more than getting to down.... hope this works ! it did with me xx

Answer 2

This may sound a bit stupid but over the course of the relationship there were things I'm sure you wanted to do that you didn't. Whether it was take a vacation or date this other person that caught your interest (if that happened). This is the time to engage in all those activities we do to better ourselves or for the pure fun of it that we don't do while we are coupled. Get season tickets to a team you like or the arts center. Take a last minute vacation with friends, workout, read books you have been wanting to pick up. And you have to remember that alone and lonely are different states of mind. You can be alone and have a very full life.

Answer 3

I think I can relate to how you feel. When I was 18 I met my ex-wife. We were together for 3 years, then married for another 3...total of 6 yrs together. Throw in 2 kids and a marriage that was started for all the wrong reasons, and things get complicated quickly. When it ended, things were very hard for both of us. Even though it was ultimately my decision to end it, it was still very mentally trying for me as much as her. After several months, I hit the dating scene again. Eventually I found a girl who seemed perfect--she was everything my ex wasn't, and more. Everything was great for awhile, but slowly died down. I gave my all to the relationship but just wasn't getting the same in return. And, honestly, when it ended I was crushed. Here I was thinking I actually found the one I should have met years before, but the feeling wasn't mutual. I was left with resentment towards all women. At the advice of one of my best-friends, I took a different perspective on life. I just started doing what I wanted to do, no holds barred, to hell with what anyone else thought of me. By following her advice, I found myself in a new way. Now I'm seeing a new girl, and things couldn't be better. The best part of it all, is that she encourages me to be myself, and because of this, I can be totally upfront with her regardless of how I'm feeling. So, I guess my advice here would be to have no fear in taking time to figure out what is best for you. After all, it is YOUR life. If she really cares about you, she will respect your wishes and give you the time you need. If she doesn't, or she can't wait, then it probably wasn't meant to be. By all means, don't just get married to make HER happy, do it because it would be what makes YOU happy. I've learned that living for yourself is the only way to live happy. The one that will provide you with a successful relationship is the one who will be happy that you are happy, and who is comfortable with your independence.

Answer 4

you are suffering from having your heart broken, and to get over it takes time. In the mean time, there is no escaping the road of heartbreak you will have to cross before you do get over it. That road is pain, memories, regrets, etc etc. Once you cross that road, you will see light at the end of this journey. You can help yourself through this painful process by reaching out to others for support, love, friendship, comfort. Just believe and trust that time is on your side, you will forget and you will be happy one day. Best of luck to you!

Answer 5

The most effective thing you can do is go see a hypnotist that helps people get rid of emotional baggage. Takes less than an hour. It is not "sunshine of the spotless mind" but rather, moves the emotional significance of the memory to a more neutral place.

Answer 6

I am going through a similiar situation, and my only advice is you have to put yourself (and your kids if any) first. Get out there, find a new hobby, join a new church, join a new club, keep yourself busy. The advantage that you have is that you have fond memories of your relationship, not all of us have those, so take the good, and try to forget the bad.

Answer 7

Time heals.......Its different for everyone. We all mend a broken heart in different ways. Try something new. make new friends. The important thing is to put yourself at the top of the list and do things that make you happy.

When my 10 year relasionship ended I went to the gym everyday. It keeps you healthy and focused.

Answer 8

Well don't kill yourself over a stupid women. Thats for sure. Join a gym. Go do something out in public with other people. Just have fun. Who knows. While your out there you may find someone else.

Answer 9

i have been in a relationship for 11 long years and he cheat on me i am going through a lot i am still not over him it is very hard .

Answer 10

Keep busy in both your work and hobbies as well as resuming a healthy dating regimen, if possible, with those you share interests with and enjoy being around.