I need good, solid, valid reasons why it's a bad idea for my 19 yr old step-daughter to move in with her 24 yr old boyfriend. She's away at college and met this yahoo of a guy whom her mother and I really don't care for. I realize she's 19 and can make her own decisions, and I'll just have to live it, but please help me come up with some really good, decision swaying reasons why she should not do this. Also reasons why the 5 yr gap in their ages is not a good thing either. I'm really trying to help her from making really stupid life mistakes, and I really need some ammo to drive the point home. I have my reasons, but they don't seem to hold any weight.
Any and all answers considered. Can you please please help me?
2007-03-05 00:01:06 · 7 answers · asked by Jim C 5 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Hey hey Ralphy boy - as many times as it takes to piss you off. Keep smiling !!
2007-03-05 00:09:07 · update #1
I have 4 grown children, ages 21-28, and I feel for you.
They were all determined to do what they wanted to do during the past few years.At one time, my 15 y/o daughter was in a relationship with an older man. It cut me so deeply, but I had to keep the doors to our communication open in order to be there for her when she realized what she was doing. And she did!
I honestly don't know what you can say or do to convince your daughter that she's about to make a mistake, but I agree with the poster who wrote about birth control education. Tell her what you know and help her to understand how this phase of her life can affect the entire rest of her life, then let go.
Be there for her, have her home for dinner when she can come, keep phone lines open, etc. In a word, do all you can to continue having a loving relationship with your daughter. Try not to vent your feelings about this guy to her--find a friend or your spouse to do that with--just continue being Dad.
Good luck.
2007-03-05 07:32:02 · answer #1 · answered by Croa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can do a criminal background check or you can go to the court house in the city he lives and see if he has a rap sheet, the 19 year old is old enough to learn from her mistakes and if this is a bad idea she will soon find out if it don't work out by you interfering will just want her to leave more so just stay back and see what happens and how it will all play out i found the more i tried to stop my daughter from making a bad mistake the more she was determined to make it and she now knows after 7 years i was right..
2007-03-05 08:06:50 · answer #2 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't. Unless she is living under your roof, there really isn't anything you can do. All you can tell her is this "Hunny, I don't think you are mature enough to move in a man 5 years older than you. But since you are an adult, that is your choice" And stop paying for her college. (if you are at all) Give her the book proper care and feeding of husband and tell her to use a condom.
2007-03-05 09:40:44 · answer #3 · answered by Pandora 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its true early to get in to any kind of relation ship nw.If some one truly loves u one must test it and only during the hardest of the hardest
one can say wether he really loves u or not.and 19 is too young 4 any thing...u are not even a graduate thn hw can u decide somthng 4 life.....hw stupid
2007-03-05 08:10:17 · answer #4 · answered by Deep eyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Morals.......does she have any? I hope she doesn't end up knocked up for your sake, the child and hers. 10 to 1 you and your wife end up supporting and raising the poor child.
Do you have any "power"? Are you paying for college? Paying for her books, rent, car, insurance, food, ect? Give her an ultimatum. No more help from us if you move in in with him, cuz if you do he gets the responsibility. Good luck
2007-03-05 15:32:45 · answer #5 · answered by Lakin J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
getting nocked up and coming home to you to raise it for the next 30 years
2007-03-05 08:09:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
how many times are you going to post the same stupid question you loser?
your daughter is a whore
2007-03-05 08:04:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋