If a married couple has a child should one parent stay home and raise that child?

Question

I HAD REALLY HOPED TO HEAR FROM THOSE GUYS WHO ARE BASHING WOMEN - IT IS EASY TO CRITIC BUT DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU WANT? Why not tell us what you reall want for yourselves and your kids - or is abusiveness more satisfying boys?

THOMAS PANG. SORRY I SHOULD HAVE EXPLAINED THAT BETTER. I think that the gentlmen who have answered thus far have been very decent and I thank you for your answers - I was making a reference to a specific group - who likes to say very very terrible things. Sorry. I had really hope to see them say something worthwhile - but they did not have the courage to be sensible.

Answer 1

I just wonder how you feel that the guys had answered your question is bashing women??

Answer 2

This is, of course, a personal decision that each couple should make on their own, but speaking as a SAHM, I honestly believe it is better for the kids if you can swing it. I've been able to be an active part of their education (room mom, field trips, School Councils, etc), plus I was able to volunteer in their classes and get to know how things are done at their schools!

I'm the first one that gets to hear about the good days and the bad days, I know their friends and they know that I'm there if they need me.

Being a stay at home mom requires commitment and you can't be looking for approval outside of your own heart. Your job won't be respected, even though raising your kids is the most important job in the world. It's hard work to do right, but you'll never find anything more satisfying.

So long as you can do it financially, I say stay home and raise your kids!

Answer 3

Traditionally, yes. However, because so many children are at day care these days, they have developed social skills by the time they attend kindergarden. This leaves the stay at home child at a disadvantage because they have never been in a classroom environment. My daughter was able to write her name by age 3, and attended daycare.

Of course, I'd much rather be home with her, but financial issues require that both parents worked. Having no income would have placed a lot of strain on our household situation which in turn creates an unhealthy home environment.

Yes, we were able to afford having our child, with our income, but with both of us working, and striving to create a work life balance, she seems to have benefitted from the experience more than suffered for it. I don't work full time, but I am a professional. When I'm with my daughter, we do all sorts of fun things and learning things together.

Despite my boundless love for her, I do enjoy my adult time, and she enjoys having friends her own age.

All in all, I think it is a personal choice where the parent must gauge the child and see what benefits the child. If my daughter did not do well at day care, we would have figured out somehow to accommodate her needs by one parent not working.

Answer 4

I believe in the first few years of the child, mom should always be available to guide and raise the child.

But today, it depends if one parent can provide for the family.If one can give financial support by himself/herself there will be no prob. It's just practical if both parents will work,especially that it is so expensive having a child right now. (You know what I mean)

Just have someone reliable and trustworthy to whom you can leave your child. Aside from your parents (which i'm not sure if you can trust or not to mind your child, hehe) its not really impossible to find one. I know because I've been there.

Answer 5

I think it is better for the child to have a parent
as a main carer for the first year at least.
as someone who raised a lot of other people's
children at one point in my life, and studied early
years education, I do believe that is the best thing
for the child, given that the parents are stable and
know what they are doing (cause I've some that don't...)

Answer 6

Yes, at least until the child is old enough to go to elementary school. No child care employee can replace a parent.There are couples where both ppl just have to work full-time and I won't put those ppl down. But you asked for an opinion so I decided to answer.

Answer 7

My little guy (4 yrs old) goes next door to a "Legal" daycare provider, my neighbor. I work 5 minutes away, so I'm in town. Chris likes Day care, he get's to play with lots of other kids, instead of sitting at home bored, they paint, have story hour, and play, at 5 PM I pick him up and I'm home. It cost's me $250.00 a week, everyone else is a mother on welfare, and the state (you and me) picks up the tab, some have 3 kids there, they are nice kid's but, I am one of the few (another parent is an attorney) who pay's for this out of my pocket, every other piece of ^$#@ is here from the third world getting it for free, that's why BOTH of us have to work, to afford a house on Long Island.

Answer 8

Frankly, I think that most of the problems in our society today are due to the dissolution of family values. Moms should not work, and fathers should. People would have to learn to live within their means, but the result would be children that would become responsible adults. There would be less alcohol and drug use, crime and fewer mixed up young people if they were reared in a more traditional setting. Most kids nowadays raise themselves with little or no adult guidance or supervision. Fewer marriages would end in divorce. That's just my opinion.

Answer 9

Yes otherwise your child grows attached to a stranger who is not a guaranteed fixture in their lives. Those children also begin to act out at their parents due to the neglect they feel.

Answer 10

I don't think there is a "Yes" or "No" answer; it is the parenting skill that counts. There are many who turn out great with both parents working, and there are also many who grow up into social scum with a stay home parent.