My boyfriend's sister is 17 years old. She's been smoking pot for years now and she even has done 3 hits of E with alcohol. Her father doesn't do anything to help and things are just getting worse. My question is, how do i get the police involved? I have evidence of her smoking weed on more than one ocacassion (pictures) and things have gotten so bad that when she is high she has all her friends over trashing the house and stealing my boyfriends stuff.
This is been going on for 2 years now and there's nothing i can do myself, the father isn't doing anything at all, infact he's practically helping by not following through with her punishment. She's out of control and this is just an extra burden on my life. Any advice would be great. Thank you in advance.
2007-03-04 18:03:52 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
her father let her drop out of highschool and now all she does is well....whatever the hell she wants w/o any consequences. My boyfriend wants to do something about it, he can't stand her. He works 40 hours a week and doesnt have one moment to relax because of all the drama she brings forth. I don't want to be a snitch, but i want it all to end, it's an ongoing headache.
2007-03-04 18:19:19 · update #1
First thing I would suggest is for your bf to move out....If he is working 40 hours a week, he should be able to support himself.
(if he is old enough)
I had a room mate that turned out bad and I contacted the land lord put a lock on my door.(maybe an option to protect his items from being stolen)
I don't know if I would take on the responsibility, of being the one to turn her in, I wouldn't give up either.(forever blaming you...the family that is...it could mean long term destruction of your relationship with them)
I would try to get her brother or father to see her path of destruction....calling the police even if you have pictures...well they have to see and catch it. If they catch her are they going to help her or just lock her up.
So wishing you could convince her to get the help she needed before that happening.
Don't give up....call your local services or big brother(also for girls) try to find out other avenues and then pass the information on to the boyfriend and father.....
Best wishes
2007-03-04 18:35:53 · answer #1 · answered by travelingirl005 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you got the police involved, you could absolutely ruin her life. There is no need for the police to be involved for her drug use. It's not the state's business. You have no right to do this and the consequences could be far worse than you imagine. Remember, the police aren't there to help her - they're there to lock her up.
Her behavior towards the family members is what needs consequences. You may not realize this, but the vast majority of pot smokers are mellow nice people who wouldn't trash anyone's house. That sounds more like alcohol abuse.
Don't allow her over, make her pay for things she trashes, report her for stealing. Don't get the state involved in her substance abuse.
2007-03-04 18:15:16 · answer #2 · answered by cassandra 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Don't be a snitch!!!
If she's 17 years old, she's basically an adult, and she can make her own decisions. If she chooses to use pot, drink and take E, that's her business, not yours!!!
Worry about your own life, rather than butting into hers!!!
Beyond that, if she gets arrested because of your snitching, your boyfriend and his father are going to blame YOU! Now, I don't know if they're hot tempered guys, but they will be extremely angry at you - particulary if they have to spend a lot of money on bail or if your boyfriend's dad gets into legal trouble for having drugs in his house!!!
So, quit being a meddling snitch, and mind your own business!!!
2007-03-04 19:06:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The key person in all of this is the father. It's his responsibility to confront her regarding her drug use. The second person who should be more involved his your boyfriend. Maybe they should have a confrontational, tough love session with a counselor? The father seems to be an enabler & is probably fearful of losing his daughter's approval or love if he were to confront her. Unfortunately there is little you can do. If I were you if this is such a grind on you personally, maybe you should reconsider your relationship with your boyfriend? I would recommend that you consider breaking up with him & also getting away from his family, unless the boyfriend makes a commitment to move away or steer clear until the sister cleans up her act. It's up to the family to handle this issue, not your's. Best of luck anyway.
2007-03-04 18:52:14 · answer #4 · answered by gone 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
SInce this is your boyfriend's sister, I think you should stay out of it. Your best bet would be to suggest to your boyfriend that he talk to his dad about it because he is concerned. If that doesn't work, call a 24 hour hotline (a lot of drug/alcohol counselors have them listed in the phonebook) and ask for advice. Police will not go off of pictures. They have to catch someone in the act (at least in Kansas they do).
2007-03-04 18:17:50 · answer #5 · answered by Nubian Princess 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds to me like your playing a hero and hero's not named superman get hurt in most cases. I remember that a neighbor of mine made it his business to call the cops on me and my friends for smoking pot in high school and we got in trouble. He then got his car all messed up because we popped his tires and broke out his windows, because my business was none of his. No one likes a hero, so be aware of what you are doing cause you may be playing with fire here.
2007-03-05 23:31:01 · answer #6 · answered by sincity usa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't call the cops, that's plain snitching out not to mention all the legal fees and stuff her dad will just end up having to pay....put a lock on his door if he don't want his stuff stolen
2007-03-04 18:07:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
she may need rehab, but certainly not legal problems which would only make things worse, both for her, and for your relationship with your boyfriend. it is her dad's responsibilty to seek help for her, not yours, but since you are so concerned you could talk to her school guidance counselor, not to get her into trouble, but to get her help. just make sure you think your actions and the repurcussions through before you make any final decisions. you should definantly talk things over with your boyfriend too, because involving yourself in his family affairs may tear you two apart, instead of bringing you closer together.
2007-03-04 18:10:29 · answer #8 · answered by confused 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
well if you are not doing it, or your brother, you dont have to be cautious. simply go to the police station or dial the police number that is local and not emergency (aka 911) and tell them your situation and have them nicely take a quiet approach so she doesn't get blamed and jailed forever. it also helps to get them to start her on a drug rehab program.
2007-03-04 18:08:33 · answer #9 · answered by Chris C 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
turn her in to the police and they will arrest her for drugs
2007-03-04 18:39:12 · answer #10 · answered by kat_luvr2003 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋