How can u tell someone?

Question

How do you tell your own husband that youu want a divorce? We've been married for 4 years and I've lost love for in a year and a half ago. And I havent cheated but im inlove with someone else. Someone who treats me with more respect than what I am getting now.
FTI: My husband get violent when he gets mad. What should I do and how should I tell him....????
PLease anything will help... Just no sacastic comments

This other guy that im inlove with is a very close friend of mine and he wants to be with me and I want to be with him. Ive known him for years but I didnt want to get involved with him because I thought I loved my husband ...you know what they say...friends are closer than anything else...But now I love him and Ive loved him for almost a year...What should I do please help

Answer 1

1. Tell your husband you want to separate. Nothing permanent, in case you want to come back.

2. Move out on YOUR OWN. Not with your "friend." This way, you can sort out your feelings.

3. Give yourself some time to make sure you are making the right decision (at least several months).

4. If you want your husband back, then, go back. If you want to be with your friend, be with him. If you want to be single, then you already are!

5. PROBLEM SOLVED!

Answer 2

B4 u jump the gun. Stop !!! Sit down and think. Review back the years you spend with your hubby. I'm sure he got something nice for you to married him. 4 yrs is not a short time. You are facing your problem like a teenager. U mention u didn't cheat your hubby, but you are doing so emotionally, as a wife,your thoughts should be on him, and not on your soon to be bf.
You are not been fair to your partner, cause you are comparing him to your current bf which was your best fren. It's totally different. Once you start to compare both of them, you are not been fair to your hubby, as he's still in the dark as to what you are thinking.
Be frank with him. Say out your heart problem and what is making you disliking him and why the complain of non respect. Communication always work in the relationship. IF after talking to him, he still act the same then you can make your final decision. B4 talking to him on your current relationship or if you know you going to divorce him,make sure you have someone sleeping over your house. Never break the news to him if you both are alone in the house. Prevention is better, as nowadays, the newspaper is showing all types of violent, ugly killing that anger can shown.

Answer 3

You are about to make the biggest mistake in your life and you don't even no it.I cannot think of one marriage where one partner had an affair and wasn't sorry for it afterwords.I no you don't believe it and you think what your feeling is love from the other man but it isn't all it is ,is a friend treating you the way you would like your husband to treat you.You are cheating on your husband and by doing what your doing your husband doesn't stand a chance.You better be sure you want to leave your marriage because when your husband finds out about the two of you their will be no turning back it will be final.

Answer 4

Having been married myself for 13 yrs and then divorcing, i say hang in there and work ur marriage. If u cant solve ur present predicatment how do u think u are going to cope with this other guys. Work on ur marriage and get counselling. If all else has been tried and failed then u can move on, not before that. Time out with this boyfriend and figure out ur relationship first. And if u can pray over it - the power of god is incredible.
i truly regret not not working harder at my marriage - cos there was love but he turned violent but still i should have tried harder cos the love u felt the first time with ur husband should remind u what u had felt for each other. dont let 3rd party get in the way of ur marriage. Divorce is never the answer.
all the best.

Answer 5

First of all, in my opinion, emotional affairs are more harmful than physical affairs. You just need to leave, maybe while your husband is at work, and although it may be a horrible way to tell him, call him and tell him you have made a decision to leave him and you want a divorce. And tell him the reason you are telling him on te phone is because you know his history of violence. I am not blaming you for being emotionally involved with someone. Seems like there was a lot to drive you away. But there's always 2 sides to every story! I do commend you for not getting physically involved with the new guy. And to make things easier on you, DON'T get physically involved until your marriage is dissolved. Good luck to you!

Answer 6

You need to work things out with your husband who is to say that this guy doesnt turn out the same way where is the man you married and said you would spend the rest of your life with? do your vows mean anything and if you do get a divorce how can you make a commitment to the new guy with all your heart if you just broke off the vows you made to your husband four years ago. Think back to what made you marry him in the first place

Answer 7

If you are worried that he might get violent, then plan your escape or get a place of your own before you tell him, that way you can just leave and be safe, or maybe move out when he is not around if you fear for your life. You deserve to be happy and be with someone who treats you good. This is coming from someone who stayed in a marriage for 12 years of unhappiness, just because I believed in marriage, I left and I am very happy now and I am with the man who treats me great!!!!

Answer 8

You have to love someone in order for you to stay in the relationship and make it work. If you don't love your husband anymore, than you should tell him the truth.Don't waste his time and your time anymore.Especially, there is a third person involved. If you think you are deserved better than the situation you are in now, than do what make you happy.

Answer 9

Obviously when you had problems with your hubby , you did not talk about it. Now that this happened, and it is YOU who are thinking of divorce becos of another man..I'd say "THINK AGAIN". Do you have children out of this marriage? If yes, they will suffer. If not, maybe it might work. But let me caution you, life may not be a bed of roses even if you divorced your hubby and lived with the man you love.So think carefully. It is your choice.

Answer 10

sweetie men are men wether u love them or not ..they change after sometime.i suggest u work things out first with ur husband,remember the heart can be deceiving.think about the good things u shared, stop seeing this other guy for a week or so n listen to yourself, think beyond your feeling.