What do I say to a bully?

Question

This is really long, sorry! I have a point!
I am 16 and I'm not one to take stuff from bullies. But the other day I was at a basketball game (state competion). I'm in the band that plays for it. I have a hard time "fitting in" with the people on the trip because none of them are my friends and they don't bother including people who aren't their friends. They are the only somewhat nice ones on the trip. I went to sit with them and the girl on the end (not as nice as the others) it was the only place to sit, the only people to sit with. This girl starts making a big deal about me sitting there and tells the guys on the end not to make room for me. She keeps saying "why are you sitting here" and "aren't you going to leave" "you're annoying" etc, etc. At first I put up with it because I know it will satisfy her if I leave and then that will be me putting up with her bullying. Then she just keeps griping so I leave. Bad mistake. What do I say to her/do next time or what should I have done?

Answer 1

haven't been there for awhile. I think a mature way to deal with bully is to let them know that you don't appreciate the way they treat you in an assertive but non aggresive way. once you get angry or show any sign of reaction towards what they say or do to you, they know they gain the power of controlling you and your emotions. tell them that it makes them look cheap, stupid, immature, unpopular and stay away from them. it's like when people give you something you don't want, return the 'gift' right back to them. you don't accept it, you don't get affected by it and you don't take it. let them know but be assertive and firm and non aggresive or angry. good luck!

Answer 2

I probably would say something like: "Looks like YOU are the only one with a problem here. So why don't you let me have YOUR seat and you can just go now."

Half the people at the table would applaud you I am sure.

Whatever happens, and it is quite possible nothing more will happen, but if it does, ignore her.

And if that doesn't work, just let her know in as few words as possible she doesn't have any control over you. Dismiss her with as little effort as you can.

She is looking for drama, don't give it to her.

Answer 3

If you're not really gutsy and don't wanna really create great conflict try to say something that can embarrass her "politely" like "Please stop complaining like an old hag.. What's the big deal?(And did you say there were guys?)All right, since you're so desperate to sit with the guys here i'll let you not to worry." Leave the seat with a smile.. Or ask her to stop her nonsense by saying "Excuse me can you please stop that, (you talk like a soggy halibut<--optional) and your drool is all over my face"
Hee hee.. Hope this might be of some use..

Answer 4

Next time look her straight in the eye and ask " Why do you hate yourself so much? You are so beautiful but so totally lacking in confidence that you have to pick on someone to make you feel good. I am so sorry you feel so bad about yourself. I hope you are getting help." She will leave.

You have to do this with sincerity and a lot of compassion.

Answer 5

if ther wasent another seat..i would have said "hey look around do you see a place for me to sit,trust me i dont wana sit with you more than you dont wana with me"..most bullys exp the girl one wont do any thing if you stand up to them put them in ther place and thay shuld shut ther mouth..

Answer 6

tell her your not leaving just cause she dont want you there, tell her if your presence bothers her then she should be the one to get up and leave, stand up to her that will shut her up, she started trouble with you cause her friends were around, if you stand up to her and get mouthy with her her friends will laugh about what you say and it will make her mad and shut her up, tell her your not leaving cause she has issues and she is a few hot dogs short of a picnic , if your presence bothers her then she should go speak to her therapist about it cause you just dont care

Answer 7

say something like "umm excuse me, look who's the one being obnoxious! it's not a big deal i'm sitting with you!" and then sarcastically introduce yourself. good luck with this bully!

Answer 8

you don't have to put up with that. sit by yourself and talk to your real friends on the cell phone or listen to headphones.

Answer 9

Say, " are you playing around, make one false move, and I'll take ya down, get back, get back you don't know me like that."

Answer 10

NEVER allow anyone to bring you down and DON'T make way for bullies.