2007-03-04 09:59:51 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
there is only one solution that is recommended by both the north american hello kitty council and the reigning bolivian monarch. so here is what you do. first, you call your local pbs station and donate just enough to get yourself a tote bag with a picture of the mclaughling group on it. second, fill your totebag with the extrement of your favourite left handed austranout. third, send the tote bag back to your pbs station, and insist that you want "backsies". by this point your face has developed noticable scaring from all the ligers you have been fighting in your spare time. this is good as ligers are a great source of face scars. now you have essentially returned to square "one" or in "hollywood squares" terms, you can consider yourself to be either whoopie goldberg or tom bergeron. gender is irrelevant, as you will innevitably lose your genitalia from your continued battle with those nuclear subs that have been invading your air space. anyway, during one of your battles you receive a call from tony blankley to chide you for your returning of the mclaughling group tote bag. this is good, you can reason with tony and appeal to his sense of hunger, by offering him the most delicious hoagie known to any canadian immigrant. once you have lured tony into your liger cave, you steal his magic jelly beans which are hidden deep inside his innermost chin. you take those beans to your local hillary clinton for president headquarters and insist that you have found a cure for political apathy. hillary will more than likely be unresponsive, so you will get more attention if you carry around a stick or two of dynamite. now you are ready for the final stage of the plan...operation "run nude through the highway". since you are battle hardened after your breaking of countless "human" laws, you can release your inner tom bergeron and treat passing motorists to your brand of non-threatening humor. one of the motorists will be a young innovative nuclear submarine captain who will remember you and will more than likely seek revenge for your win at the "battle of infinite improbability". but you have the upper hand as he will be unable to look directly at your face, on account of all the scarring. so you get onto his skateboard and ride into the sunset knowing full well that your unsighly palm hair is now your most attractive feature. good luck on your further travails.
2007-03-04 13:40:14 · answer #1 · answered by Circlometry™³ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let's see. So, you want to get the hair off, Jack? Well I have to hand it to you. I am not a palm reader, but a situation like this can get pretty hairy. Have you tried electrolysis? Try putting your hand on an electric fence. If this doesn't work try braiding your palm hair. Make sure you know what you are doing. Don't go off half ******.
2007-03-04 16:24:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jizzaway
2007-03-04 10:03:59 · answer #3 · answered by One Sexy Chic 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Friction. Lots and lots of friction. Oh wait, that's how you GOT the unsightly palm hair. How's your eyesight?
2007-03-04 10:02:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Easy Off BAM cleaner in your Astroglide bottle. Screw MSDS Hazardous labels!!
2007-03-05 12:26:50 · answer #5 · answered by turtle girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two words: Tater Mits.
2007-03-05 11:21:09 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I told you before, quit stroking them palm trees.
2007-03-04 11:47:49 · answer #7 · answered by cola 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Alternate gripping hand schedule.
There's a good boy...And who's the perky boy that needs a good neck rub eh? There we go....Oh yeah...Just like that...That's it....*Repetative rythmic slapping sound*
2007-03-04 10:01:50 · answer #8 · answered by veryitchycrack v 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Try using your feet from now on.
2007-03-04 10:04:57 · answer #9 · answered by KT 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a silver bullet
2007-03-04 10:05:06 · answer #10 · answered by shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋