Don't know if I'll ever enjoy it. My so called friends have deserted me, my family don't really seem to care or acknowledge that I'm pregnant, and my boyfriend claims he loves and misses me, but I hardly ever see him and I don't feel like he's making that much of and effort to see me. He is in school about 2 hours away, but doesn't come visit me on the weekends because he claims he's too busy working. His work is club party promoting. I feel like its a bunch of crap and even if that is his work, couldn't he at least put it off for one weekend considering I haven't seen him but once in almost 2 months, and I'm pregnant? And this is his spring break, and he's not here, claiming he has no money, but he always saying he working to make money, but then when I want to see him there's nothing to show for it. When he does decide to show up it's for like half a day, maybe a few hours, and then he's gone for weeks at a time, and when I complain, I get told the whole world doesn't revolve around me. He's cheated on me before, and is probably still messing around with other girls over there, but I'm not there so I can't say for sure, and everytime I confront him he says he's changed and he know he hurt me before but he aint doing that anymore. If that's the case what about spending time with me? Am I being selfish? I feel like I'm going through this pregnancy by myself everyday because of no kind of support system, and the more depressed I get couldn't be good for the baby. Its getting to the point where I feel like I'm making a huge mistake. I feel like I'm being lied to from him and I can't trust him because this just doesn't make sense to me. I've just about hit rock bottom and I don't know what to do, what to believe, or how to feel. I just think I want out.
2007-03-04 09:50:40 · 8 answers · asked by tmmygrl210 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Try asking your doctor for a counselor or a woman's group for help, if you are part of a church you could also go there for support.
2007-03-04 09:55:20 · answer #1 · answered by kittenbrower 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I think it might be time to leave this guy. He obviously has his priorities mixed up. I know you want him in your and your baby's lives but he needs to re-evaluate his life and decide whether or not he wants to be a part of you and your baby's lives. Second, check with your doctor's office for help. You need a support system and if your family isn't helping, you need to meet people in a similar situation. It's really good that you recognize that you need the help. Check out a WIC clinic. They always have resources that can help. Also online forums are very helpful when you are frustrated and need to vent. Third, remember you are carrying a new life. You are not being selfish asking the father of your baby to visit you while you are carrying his child. You are not being selfish asking for a little help from your family and friend. You should not be going through this alone. If you need someone to talk to, email me at backsyncer_04@yahoo.com Good luck and I pray everything works out for you.
2007-03-04 10:20:52 · answer #2 · answered by Mommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, honey, I am so sorry that you are feeling bad, and that you are going through your pregnancy alone.
You may feel better if you talk to your doctor because he will help with your pre-natal depression.
Your man needs to prove to you now that you and your baby are important to him, and if he can't, then it's time for you both to re-evaluate your relationship...I can't help thinking that if he weren't in the picture at all, you would be a bit happier, because you wouldn't be worrying about what he's getting up to- you wouldn't have to worry if he didn't HAVE to be loyal to you.
Remember that your feelings are being amplified by those wonderful pregnancy hormones though, but there are definitely some issues you need to work through.
Please don't feel like you have to give up, you are going to be a great mommy, and though it seems hard, you are going to get through this and be okay. When it comes to children, us moms can do anything!
Email me if you want to talk :)
2007-03-04 10:15:18 · answer #3 · answered by ♥Pamela♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't give up. Don't. Being pregnant is not easy, especially when you know that you will basically be a single mom, in the end. I am sorry to say, but your instincts are usually right. I would move on, alone (I know, it's easy for me to say), & start to look at your child like a new lease on life. You will love it. I promise. It will be the best thing that ever happened to you. Don't forget to take your boyfriend to court & get child support. Your baby deserves that much. Good Luck. Don't give up.
2007-03-04 10:00:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would get rid of him and go find a new man-he doesnt deserve you. You are not being selfish by any means. He should want to see you 1) because you're his girlfriend 2) because you're the mother of his child. Tell him to f*** off and then sue him for child support when the baby comes. Dont worry about him-he doesnt sound like hes worth worrying about. Just concentrate on yourself and your baby.
2007-03-04 10:00:14 · answer #5 · answered by Amanda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i've been there! but you have to get out of that way of thinking where everyone has to take care of you. one thing i learned is that you have to make that transistion from being taken care of to being the caretaker. YOU are the momma. and if noone wants to be there for you, then to hell with them. you have to think about how YOU are in control of your life and YOU have to be strong for you and that baby. it's you two against the world. if the father is at school, let him get his education. and whatever dreams you have, whether you put them on hold for a bit, dont let them go! don't ever give up YOUR dreams and YOUR plans. that transition from young woman, to mother is tough, but you can do it. now is not the time to be searching for a Hero, YOU have to be the hero. be your own here, be your baby's hero. you can do it! i'm a single mother of four kids. four years ago i had the safety net of my husband, and because of horrible mistakes on both our parts, he left us for another woman. and i swore i was like an abandoned child. looking around for the rescue party. then i decided to see a therapist. and she said, YOU are the rescue party, those four kids depend on YOU. if you are looking around for someone to take care of you then they'll figure out you have no control over you or them. and that can be a scary thing to put a child through. so i became the hero. and i've been surviving just fine, taking care of me and my four kids. dont count out your baby's daddy, but dont put all your hopes and dreams into one man. put them into yourself. if he comes around, then great! but if he doesnt atleast you'll be strong enough to get you and your baby through this world! good luck!
mom of four
2007-03-04 10:04:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
hunni i feel for u i honestly do. go to a club enrole ur self in somthing that make u happi meet new people n make some new friends .. build ur own support group talk to your family let them know how u feel .. slap that bf of urs in the head n tell him its half his kid too so he better pull his finger out ... hope all goes well sweetie pie chin up :)xx
2007-03-04 09:56:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
*huggs* what your feeling is normal i think you should go visit him at school and see whats realy up.and than go to lamaz classes and meet other prg ppl and talk to them it will get u in the mommy mood start buying baby cloths and show them off to the friends and family
2007-03-04 10:02:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋