What is too ealy to talk to your daughter about sex, boys? My daughter is 7. Ask for further discussion.?

Question

My daughter was at a party last night for little kids 7-10. Two other little girls and a little boy were playing together. I have no clue who started the conversation (of course I got 4 different answers) but the boy was talking about his weenie and two of the girls said my daughter and him kissed AND my daughter had inquired about it. After about losing my mind, I had to figure out how to talk to her. I brought her up first and asked her. She said they never kissed they were just in each other face talking. He confirmed but said she asked about the weenie. She said he brought it up and the other kids had different stories. I need to talk to her about boys and sex and peer pressure. BUT is 7 too young? I wasn't thinking about boys at that age, actually until I was in the 9th going to the 10th grade. And she's involved in alot of afterschool activities so can't say she's just sitting around doing nothing.

Answer 1

Well, I guess your question should more so be "How in-depth should our sex talk be?". I think it's fairly obvious that you have to talk to her about something at this point.
7 is not exactly the age I would think that is appropriate, but we live in a society where girls as young as 10 and 11 are getting pregnant! Someone probably should have had the talk with THEM!
I don't think there is a 'magic' age to start discussing sex with your child. You just have to know when the time is right. Sometimes, events out of your control (like her just going to a party) can trigger the need for such conversations. I think you should have a candid discussion about her questions about the boy's "weenie" and go from there. It will be awkward at first, but the more you two can talk about it honestly, she might loosen up a bit and start asking questions. That kinda takes the pressure off of you so you don't have to worry about being too graphic or giving more info than what she wants to hear.
One tip I will give is that this is where many parents use the talk in an unhealthy way. Some parents try to make sex seem scary and dirty. Try not to emotionally scar your child. (I mean, don't make it sound really fun and desireable, though either!). Also, some parents threaten their children..."If you EVER let a boy touch you there...If you EVER kiss a boy..." etc. That stuff sunts their social skills and makes them afraid of men.
Other than that, I do think it's time to speak with her. Good luck! :-)

Answer 2

This question shocked me! As a mother of a seven year old daughter and eight year old son I couldn't believe it! My son says he has a little girlfriend and he has told me that his friends (also 8) are going to ask their "girlfriends" on a date. Not that he is serious or anything but it just goes to show that these little kids are thinking about each other. This is so shocking to me because I was still playing with Barbie Dolls until I was 13-14 yo. I think that when a child starts asking questions, that is the time to talk to them. I wouldn't get to graphic or into to much details. But I would answer any questions that she may have. She is just curious right now and starting to realize that boys and girls are different. I think that YSIC who answered the question already hit the nail on the head. Listen to what she said...lol! Me on the other hand, I am going to go and try to buy a chasity belt somewhere... see ya'!!! :)

Answer 3

Start the conversation Now! But first you need to calm down. Have you interrogated everyone involved? The only kid you have a right to question is your own. Ask Questions. Listen to the answers she gives. Break down what she has said and explain the 'Family position' on that activity. Answer her questions concisely and completely for her maturity level offering only information you think she is ready for. Mostly though, relax. Yes, they know more than we did at that age. Just look at what they learn on TV. Make sure even now that she knows she can tell you anything without you freaking out. Leave that for later when she won't know.

Answer 4

Yes 7 is to young, but only answer the ?'s as they come, answer them honestly. I have a 9 year old that loves, loves, loves boys I go through the same thing on a daily basis. Dont let them fool you they are doing and talking alot more on the playground at school. Thats where they learn it.

Answer 5

if you don't tell her, she WILL find out in school. i knew all of that stuff in fourth grade and my mom was embarassed. save yourself some embarassment and tell her. just don't wait until your daughter is in the teens to say something like you can talk to me about anything. she's only seven right now, but that's sure to make her do the opposite. kids today know A LOT more than parents think. while we may not have as much life experiences as our elders, we are not lacking that kind of knowledge in any way. be a cool dad!

Answer 6

Its never too early kids these days are getting into sex in elementary school. If shes curious about a "weenie" explain to her everything. Or buy her a book.

Answer 7

7 is not too young. i think its a prefect age to start at. i konw some one who was 7 yrs old when she was sexually abused. she didn't know abt sex or anything, her parents never told her, probably cuz they never expected that to happen to her, but it did in a public school. she was seduced over a month's time and she agreed to do it to make the guy happy, but she never wanted to do and never understood the concept of it. her conscience told her it was wrong, but some part of her, i guess the curious nature wanted to know what it felt like in addition to making hte guy happy, so she did it.

ever since then, her parents blame it on her and chastise her for engaging in a horrendous act like that. but me being her friend, she secretly desires what happend to her when she was 7 ysr old. she doesn't want rape, she just wants to do it. its something that she can't get out of her head. like a day can't go by for her without some perverse image entering her head. but then again, she's too afraid to do it again b/c she believes it will mess her life up as she may start thinking abt that encounter on a daily basis.

i advise you start early, b/c you don't want your daughter to learn abt sex thru experience. she may be attracted to it and become a whore (i dont mean to be offensive)

Answer 8

personally I would wait till grade 4 or 5 if you could. But its not good to sugar coat anything. If your daughter is experiencing inquiries about sex, tell her. Its better to be honest with her. When you are done explaining about it I would mention to her how not all of her friends really know about it, and its their parents job to talk to them about it. That way otehr parents dont have the dilemma that you have right now.

Answer 9

YES 7 is too young. try maybe when she is a teen at least.13,14,15.yea.that would be a good time.when she starts high school.