does not having a mother effect a child's growing process?

Question

i have a 2year old daughter and since she was born her mom didn want anything to do with her , that was 2years ago, so now i raise my little girl by myself. i'm only 21 and i'm stil learning bout myself let alone how to be a parent and lately i jus felt that it would be unfair for this lil girl not to know her biological mother.
after many attempts get contact with her mother, i've realised its not gonna happen, so will this effect my daughters growing up process?

Answer 1

I strongly believe that a bad parent is better off staying away until they can sort themselves out. I also believe a child needs someone to love and care for them 100% whether that is their mother, father or grandparent. Unconditional love is what children need and it sounds to me like you're doing a fab job. I have a lot of respect you for not letting your daughter down as her mother has. There may be times in the future when she will need a female perspective on things but this doesn't have to be her mother. I know people who have been screwed up by their mothers. I'm a mother of 3 children so I know how scary it can be when you start thinking of the "what ifs"
Please have faith in yourself and I'm sure your daughter will be just fine. I wish you both a future full of happiness and good times, take care.

Answer 2

Maybe it will affect her growing up but then again, maybe along the way, you will meet someone and remarry.
21 is not so young. It's young to old people. It's old to young people. But it is a pretty reasonable age to do a lot of things. Lot of people marry when they are that age - especially when they got engaged in college.
Your daughter's mom will want to have something to do with her daughter when she gets more of her life on track. Let her come forward using her own timetable. Above all, don't give up custody of your little girl the minute her mom comes on the scene. Your daughter will need to know that her dad loves her and wants her in his life - not part-time, full-time. It will help her to feel secure. Life dealt her a bad hand but she had some luck because you are her dad. Enjoy it.

Answer 3

Well although this is nothing like your situation, my parents divorced and I lived with my dad. I was about 15 when I realized I needed my mother. She lived in a different state and I never really saw her. So little girls do need their mommies, but if you can play the role of both mom and dad and get her trust (when she gets older) you should be okay. Or maybe when she gets older have one of your female family/friends talk to her so she knows she has a female figure in her life. I'm probably not much help, but good luck.

Answer 4

it could, but that all depends on you. my hubby ans his 2 brothers and 1 sister were raised without a mother. she took off when my hubby was 6 and he's the oldest. they definitely have some issues because she was not there. however, they have more issues because of the way their father raised them. i pretty much had kids thinking that she would always be around to raise them and he wouldn;t have to do anything. the man has no fathering skills at all. the kids spent a year and a half in foster care and most are on drugs now. like i said, they do have some issues, like they are not sensitive at all and their only real emotion is anger, but at the same time blame the way he raised them. you'll be fine as long as you try.

Answer 5

Unfortunately, yes, I think it will. Not only does a child really need both parents, a child whose mother didn't want her is under a terrible burden of feeling as if they are, somehow, too flawed to be loved by anyone if their own mother didn't love them.

I don't know the best thing to do here, but I would seek out a professionals' advice. I, also, would find a female relative - a mother? grandmother? aunt? - who loves this little girl and will help to let her know that she is precious, and valued, and, above all, loved.

I wish you well...

Answer 6

First off this answer is coming from a girl who has no father.It shouldn't effect her physically but emotionally it is going to kill her inside. Let her know that she is good enough and that it is her moms loss.you can't really control her heart but you can help it. it will take her years to heal, I'm sorry to tell you this but she won't be completely healed til after she is grown.maybe never.i think about my Daddy everyday and it hurts so bad.She will most likely go through depressed stages. Which will include crying, and it will seem as if she is withdrawn. But leave her be and just be supportive.You can't eliminate these stages no matter how hard you try. If it is obvious that she is REALLY depressed she may need anti-depressants or aermatherapy which are both forms of relaxers and anti-depressants. aeromotherapy is the use of rare smell good things like bath stuff including sandalwood oil, rose water and various other oils added to bath water to help soothe and relax rhe mind. this stuff can be found on ebay for cheap and it is recommended for depressed children as pills may increase depression and thoughts of suicide. Much luck and love.

Answer 7

Since it is a little girl; she should have a mum.

She will be happy with just having you through most of her childhood, but when she is a teenager she may not feel comfortable with discussing "certain topics" with you.

I think that this will be partialy remidied by having her grandmother, or an aunt or some other trusted female adult in her life too.

Answer 8

I a childrens home so, I have no mum or dad and I cope. I have 2 sisters age 4 and 8 and a bro age 11 and im 14.

Answer 9

I'm very sorry to hear about her mum. I know a boy who is in this position, he's 17 with a 4 month old. The mom has passed away. He has a boy though. Best wishes to you. I don't think your daughter will be too affected, she will be proud of you!

Answer 10

well my friends mom left her, her dad, and her siblings when she was little..... she is now 13..... she is doing fine.... she had a tough life but that wasnt all the fault of not having a mother..... as long as u r caring, loving, and understanding... one parent will be enough......