Im in love with a guy who is in love with me too. But our relationship can't be work out coz he's leaving the country and may not return at all. he says it's better to be friends as he thinks that long distance relationship doesn't work. he has been in one before and it didn't work. It has hurt him a lot . he says that he doesn't want our friendship to break because of this nor does he want to lose me. He doesn't want to have a heartbreak either and nor does he want to hurt me.so we decided to remain friends. . but after a few days, i texted him but he stopped replying in other words he started distancing himself just before he left the country and after we talked about that. finally, he started ignoring me. Why is he doing that? what should i do?
2007-03-04 03:30:13 · 20 answers · asked by fed up 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Should being back to friends be like that? Is it normal that he is ignoring me when he said that it's better to be friends? but when he sees me down or not feeling well, he comes and talk. Apart from that, he totally ignores me. Can somebody explain to me what is this attitude he is adopting and why is he doing that? coz am not sure if what am thinking is right
2007-03-05 20:11:45 · update #1
You answered it yourself..he needs distance..
2007-03-10 09:42:16 · answer #1 · answered by annie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This guy wants to persue his dreams and doesn't want you stopping him. I am sure you have told him that you will "wait" for him until he comes back. All guys do this! They are very strong about putting their dreams first and don't want anyone stopping them.... That is part of their maleness and what makes them attractive. He probably, LIKE he said, doesn't want to have a long distance relationship and is probably treating you this way because he want YOU to move on and persue your own dreams. After all, if neither of you persue any dreams, you won't be going anywhere in a marriage. You are suppose to do all of that beforehand, TRUST me. If you don't, you will always wonder what things would have been like "IF" we had just waited and done all of things we wanted to do beforehand.
He doesn't want to be tied down or having you stop him for any reason. He is on the move. Leave him be. If it is meant to be, he will return, however, I would STRONGLY suggest that you find someone else since this guy is being very selfish at this time. Not to say that he won't grow up, but you are the one that will get hurt in the hopes that you have that he will respond to you.
2007-03-04 03:49:41 · answer #2 · answered by Time4Tivo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let him go!, move on. Day to day make an effort to start looking, thinking and fantasizing about other men that are in the country and available. In a month, you'll slowly start to get over him. It hurts at first, but if you put your mind to it-you can do it. It really works. Don't work that hard to "keep" anyone. Being with someone should be mutual not a struggle.
2007-03-10 09:33:56 · answer #3 · answered by Bambi 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you said that he had a long distance relationship before and that it didn't work and it caused him a lot of pain, and that's why you think he's doing this now.
I'd just confront him and make sure that's why... because if he were putting me into the same category as this other person, that would seriously piss me off.... You should be judged on your own merits.
But if he really does want to break things off.. he needs to be up front with you.
2007-03-11 14:05:58 · answer #4 · answered by larsgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is trying to be nice (in his eyes) by telling you that he doesn't want to be on a l/d relationship when he really just wants to break up. His ignoring you shows that he doesn't want to talk to you. Guys can be confusing, but for the most part, they are easy to figure out. He is being a jerk by not telling you straight out what is going on. Consider yourself lucky that he is moving and find another guy. P.S. Don't believe me? Bring up moving with him so you two can be together. He probably won't like it. If he likes the idea, then he probably does want to be with you. But if he doesn't like it, (which I'm betting he won't) you'll know its all just a game he's playing to "let you down easy". I really think if he loved you, you wouldn't be so confused. You'd know because he would be straight with you.
2007-03-11 08:26:36 · answer #5 · answered by ejc_360 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is trying to break it to you gently that he doesn't want to have any ties when he is moving away....he likes you for a friend, but doesn't want a serious relationship right now.
Guys often don't say specifically what they really mean. He is breaking up with you....does want to be friends...but doesn't want a girl friend/boy friend relationship and is distancing himself to let you know that. He thinks he is treating you alright but he would be kinder to be more specific...he is trying not to hurt you.
He did say he just wanted to be friends. He means just that, so stop calling him and leave it to him when he wants to contact you again. It hurts because you want more than that...but you have to accept that is not what he wants...and he is being realistic with where his life is at right now.
2007-03-09 16:23:01 · answer #6 · answered by samantha 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he really loved u he will not b ignoring u and he will not b telling u 2 becom friends so jus leave him and the reason y he's doing that is becuz he's jus being funny and u dont need that in your life especially if your the woman that doesn't take s*** from no1 okay so jus say no
2007-03-11 11:06:27 · answer #7 · answered by Th3 badd3st 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether his decision is right or wrong, he has his reasons & you should respect that. However it doesn't mean you can't write to him from time to time, showing your concern for his study, work, life, wellbeing, etc. If he still cares for you despite the distance, the friendship will carry on & who knows what the future would bring?
Enduring love is based first of all on true friendship to start with.
2007-03-06 01:52:47 · answer #8 · answered by MoiMoii 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe the reason he is cutting contact is because it would be too painful for
both of you. People change and when he moves he might meet someone else
that is close by him. Make new friends, it's not the end of the world, even if it
feels like it right now. Good luck.
2007-03-10 12:23:40 · answer #9 · answered by Garnet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yup Romney has stated some extremely stupid, annoying issues. I wager youre unwilling to confess Obama, The Messiah, is responsible of the comparable. Hell look at Biden, he's a humiliation. yet that doesn't remember stunning?
2016-09-30 04:42:35 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My b he just thinks that it wont work being so far. And maybe he just doesnt want to hurt u!!! I min face facts he'll be yonks of space away so how will u 2 make it exactly work? I hope that it answered your question and made you realise the real answer!!!
2007-03-08 03:17:13 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋