Help me help my friend please, she needs it.?

Question

Ok i have a friend ill call "jenn". Jenn is treated like a slave. She was adopted, and her parents are acting like there the ones who are the teenagers. They go out 5-6 days a week, and leave her to take care of her brother and sister until real late, 11-12. She does all the household chores too. Her father verbally abuses her, and her mother doesn't care. I know to anyone reading this it may seem just a common case of parent's and teenagers having differences, but it isn't. It's everyday. Jenn's other friends, who are female, just blow it off and tell her to wait. Other friends don't know to what extent this is occurring, if at all. I want to help her, i talk to her everyday about it and give her comfort, but its time for an actual working action that can at least temporarily relive this, if not make it completely go away. Don't tell me to tell her to go to another adult or teacher, there arnt any that care, and school system's don't work. I seriously need a working effective solution

Answer 1

How old is Jenn? If she is at least 16 she can make that call to leave and live probably in a safe shelter where there are people who will care for her. Sounds so horrible, I know it sounds terrible to say this but maybe she needs to get some social worker to help her? To take her out of there. Will you be willing to speak up on her behalf? They will need someone to back her story up. Should they question her parents and they say she is lying then she will be in a worse situation, so if you decide with her to help her get out of that situation make sure the both of you stand up strong and speak the truth bravely. I am not sure where you are living etc., but I will pray for the both of you that Jenn may find peace and you as well. Thank you for helping her. You are making a difference in her life, letting her know that someone cares is a big deal. Thank you for showing her love.

Answer 2

You are absolutely right!
So many adopted children are being physically and mentally abused to the point of no return. People are simply adopting them to collect the money. I read a story about how a family adopted some children,and basically kept them enclosed in make-shift cages. (But anyway),I fell for "Jenn",and she has become one of these types of victims.
Because she is old enough,she can contact the person/agency who placed her with this family. This person/agency is suppose to make monthly evaluations on her living conditions anyway. If you think she may have been threatened by her adoptive parents,into not saying anything about what's been going on in her home,then she must make a formal complaint immediately to the police. They should be able to contact the agency and perform an investigation. Depending on how old Jenn is (and when she will finish high school),then there's the possibility,that she can leave the home,and Social Services will find her a household of her own. (In the meantime) My prayers will be with her,and you as well. (Love: Squeakers)

Answer 3

Think about it. Can you provide housing for your friend? Are you able to care for your friend (financially) at this point? If you answered no to these questions, then your friend has no other options but to go to an adult. Tell her to bug the school counselor (that is their job) to assist her in this matter. If the school counselor doesn't do his/her job, tell your friend to set up an appointment with the school board members and let them know that she is not getting the assistance she needs in her case which involves abuse. Has she even tried talking to school counselors about this issue? If she haven't spoke with a school counselor then there's no need to assume that they will not help, again that is there job. It's great you talk to her friend and you are there to listen but there's so much you can do because she still have to go back into the home. She also try Dept. of Social Services for assistance.

Answer 4

There is no effective solution that doesn't involve going to a responsible adult. She can not change the actions of her adoptive parents. Notify the local Department of Social Services, social worker or school guidance counselor of the situation. If one person seems to do nothing, then go to another. It is the only way to affect a positive change. If she tries to force them to change on her own, the situation could worsen to include physical abuse.

Answer 5

I commend you on helping your friend. Your friend will need to talk to an adult in the school system ( a guidance counselor). The reasons I say that is, the school needs to be aware of what's going on. If they do not help, tell your friend to go to Dept. of Social Services (child protective services). I know you said "don't say go to another adult" but she has to because you cannot help her at this point. You are there to listen and talk to her (which is great) but once the listening and talking is over, she has to go back into the home where she is being abused.

Answer 6

Hi!

Honestly,there is no effective solution that doesn't involve going to a responsible adult. She can not change the actions of her adoptive parents. Notify the local Department of Social Services, social worker or school guidance counselor of the situation. Or maybe you could wait until she turns 18 and leaves on her own!

Later! I hope this helps!

Answer 7

You should keep talking to her about it but try not to over do it. She shouldn't have to do all of that. You and her should stand up to the parents. I say the verbal abuse shouldn't be happening cuz then whatever her father says she probably takes to heart and she may believe whatever he has said to her. They tell her to "wait" wait for what? Till they see everything for themselves??!!! NO!! She should be glad for having a friend like you. You don't know try and ask another adult that you KNOW will care. Believe me if you both do this now she will feel better for herself and her brother and sister..

whatever you do DON'T GIVE UP ON HER!!!!!

Answer 8

What she needs to do is tell her parents how she feels about doin' everything in the house. She needs to tell them that she wouldat least like to go out every once in awhile. She doesn't need to be couped in the house all the f***in' time. that can cause a person to go insane and sometimes comit suicide. Or she can tell her parents that she won't watch the kids or do anything until she gets to do what she wants to do. Then her father verbally abusing her. Thats where you step in or anyone else who cares. You need to go to the police or something to tell them that one of your friends are getting abuse mentally. They should do something about tit. If they don't then tell her that she needs to get out some how. Go somewhere same.

Answer 9

ok, if things are getting out of control then why doesnt she try and sit down with her parents and tell them how badly behaved they are or you go tell them. if that doesnt work and it gets worse i think she should contact the police, because no one deserves to be treated like that.

Answer 10

get a lawyer at the station and say to her adopted parents see you in court : }