Soon, I will be a single parent. I am not married, my boyfreind does not want to be married after 6 years. I am raising my neice because her father was murdered 3 years ago. She is 3. I want to give her the absolute best in life. But I don't think that I can stay with this guy much longer. He doesnt repect me and I can't stand being talked down to.
He is good to the baby. He treats her like gold. Me on the other hand. I deserve better. I must go on my own, but I am scared that I won't be able to make ends meet.
How can I take care of the both of us only making 8 something an hour?
2007-03-04 00:01:21 · 13 answers · asked by Lost_chic 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I will tell you it is VERY hard to do it. But you CAN do it! I did it. I decided when I was married to a complete jerk, that it is better to be alone and happy (even if you struggle) than to be with someone that doesnt make you happy.
You need to plan now though. Where will you live? Do you have friends or family to stay with until you get some money saved? Where will your child go while you work? Do you have anyone that can keep your child while you work instead of paying daycare?
If you have to live in a place on your own, find the best place you can for the cheapest. Try to find a roommate to share rent. Many already have a place and need someone to move in. Lots of single moms out there struggling to make ends meet. Try www.roommate.com and do a search for your area.
Talk to your utility company and see if there is a plan to reduce your utilities based on income. Reduce your expenses...check your email and play in net at the library. Get the cheapest cell you can and use that instead of a landline. Shop thrift stores for clothes and other purchases.
Go to the Angel food ministries site. Once a month, you get a bunch of food for $25. Just do a search for your area and you should be able to find a site.
Good luck! Just know you are making the right decision. You WILL make it, you just need a little help. Take care!
2007-03-04 00:53:29 · answer #1 · answered by an88mikewife 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Our country sucks!
When you think some executives of major corporations received 20 million dollar Christmas bonuses and here you are struggling to make the rent on and live on only $8.00 an hour.
The statistics for Connecticut show you must make $20.00 an hour in order to afford an average safe rental you could actually live in!
You have to be congratulated for your courage and for not allowing yourself to be trapped and miss treated any longer.
All I can suggest is to apply for assistance, food stamps, rent assistance, there are programs out there for good people who are trying to do good that can help a bit.
Ever thought of being a nurse, there are numerous 2 year programs available where you could (if you could figure it out) have an RN degree in 2 years, and they get paid really well.
There are also all kinds of grants available to go back to school and get a degree so you can do better in this all too competitive good ole boy network of jobs. You will not be given the same opportunity as a white male but your opportunities will expand with an education.
We need communal living or something in this country, why not try a roommate you could trust and get along with?
Good Luck to You!
2007-03-04 09:38:07 · answer #2 · answered by Crampy Grampy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know that $8/hour doesn't sound like much at all, especially when it comes to raising a child. But in all honesty, you absolutely CAN make it on that, and take care of all her needs.. The main thing is (at least for a while) is do not spend money on any unnecessary expenses. This means.. no internet, no satellite tv, no movies/cds/games, no unnecessary shopping of any kind. If you do this, and stick to just paying your bills, while buying ONLY what is needed, then you will be able to save some money over time, and get better on your feet.
It can be done, without a doubt. It's all in how you manage your money.
I think it's wonderful that you're raising your niece, especially after such a horrible thing happened to her father. And as far as your boyfriend goes.. if he's not good to you, then in a sense, he's not being good to her. She sees/hears everything that goes on, and it will affect her, no matter how he treats her.
Myu advice to you, in regards to your relationship situation.. is to just let him go, and make it on your own. And then, when the time is right and you meet someone who is worth your time and affection, it will be well worth it.
Take care!
2007-03-04 08:59:51 · answer #3 · answered by arkiegirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you are the kind of person that will make it through the tough times. This guy obviously doesn't love you. Look for someone else to stay with until you can find a better job or maybe another part time job, like a good friend or family member. Visit your church or any church in the area. They are in the business of helping people with good hearts, which is the kind of person you are. You will probably need to cut your expenses and make some more sacrifices, but the rewards will be worth it. God Bless.
What a Wonderful World
2007-03-04 08:26:03 · answer #4 · answered by The Polish Prince 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you for wanting better in a relationship. BUT, good for him for treating the baby good, too. You should qualify for WIC and Food Stamps. I barely made it on less than $8 an hour, but I also had child support to supplement. She was also a teenager who costs more, due to gas money and spending money on the weekends to hang out with friends. If you don't have a family member to watch the baby while you work, check with your local Family Guidance Center. They usually have some sort of assistance to help with child care. Check with the state Human Resource Department as well.
2007-03-04 09:47:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did it with 9.00/hr. It was hard, but I got through it. Of course I couldn't have all the stuff I had before (cell phone, internet, cable) but that wasn't a problem. I wanted to ask you though, doesn't your neice get social security because of her father? If not, you might want to check into that. That could help you finacially take care of her. You can do it!...Think positive!:)
2007-03-04 08:37:53 · answer #6 · answered by jo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My son makes $9 an hour and he still doesn't have enough money. Apply for any assistance you might be qualified for.
You might have to give up a cell phone and cable TV if you have those things. There is life outside of TV.
2007-03-04 08:08:16 · answer #7 · answered by supertop 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of your neice has to be entitled to her father's social security. Second off go and try to get a better job. Third go to church and ask a priest for advice. They have contacts in regards to low income housing. Good luck!
2007-03-04 08:13:00 · answer #8 · answered by Tia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sell your computer, and save on internet costs. No cable or satellite tv, no cell phone, no fancy makeup or stuff for you, cook instead of eating out or fast food, no fancy coffees out, budget shopping with sales and coupons -- there are tons of things you can do, and live okay if you are careful.
2007-03-04 09:36:34 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you thought about starting your own business and then you work when you want to and you can set your own hours as well.
I did it when my kids little and it pays better.
2007-03-04 08:22:42 · answer #10 · answered by Just Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋