am i getting paranoid for no reason - think husband may have started an affair?

Question

he's a long distance truck driver and latest clues are as follows:
he carries two mobiles constantly, one is for work,he receives phone calls that he is very secretive about and if i am right there he refuses to answer phone sometimes.
this is a recent development and sometimes these calls are in the late late evening.
generally secretive about what he does every day ----nothing or what do you think is the answer, always has been - not new.
he came home on friday morning after 7 days away and got into bed with me but didn't touch me then we had *** later on during the day i discovered he had shaved pubic hair and i never let on just made a little comment oh you had a shave hon.
when ***was offered at bedtime he refused to as apparently i did not want it when he arrived home? i didn't know, he never let on.
now i'm wondering if i should be worryed because i seriously am!

that was over a year ago when my husband had left me two days before my birthday (for 4 weeks, still actually don't know why he left) and was sorted!
i might lust but i don 't do anything else!
it is just a compliment as he's so hot and i'm not.
and by the way you last two replys have way too much time on your hands if you go throgh answers and compare who writes what, i thoght i had no life....get a job.

Answer 1

Hmmmm that is worrying. Just from my own experience, my husband did the same thing to me as yours did to you - ie going off me sexually and shaving the pubic hair. He did have affairs - several in fact. The fact that your husband's guarding his phone is a bit of a worry too. Look, I'd be asking some serious questions and listening to your gut reaction. 9 times out of 10 your gut reactions are spot on. I'm sorry to be the bearer of potentially bad news, and I really hope for your sake I'm wrong, but it just sounds like too much of a co-incidence to me. If you need to discuss further, email me on [e-mail]. Hope this helps, kind regards Penny xx

Answer 2

i think you may have something to worry about. secret phone calls... can you get to the phone and look at the history somehow? call the number from a payphone? see if or who answers. And the shaven pubic hair? if he never does that i'd say watch out. I think you should really worry about this, bring it up in a non threating way. if he keeps dancing around the situtation and constantly turns you down for sex, get a private investigator. i hope all goes well, i wish you the best and i hope nothing is going on.

Answer 3

Sounds very suspicious. All of the clues point toward cheating. My ex did the whole guarding the phone thing. I found a phone bill then confronted him...he caved and told all.

If you really want to know what the deal is, confront him like you KNOW and he might as well not deny it. Most guys will tell on themselves if they think they are already caught. Just remember you wanted to know, so be prepared for the answer. Good Luck

Answer 4

I like to be optimistic but being a man myself, I know the guarding the cell phone all to well. There's a nine out of ten chance he's having an affair. A friend girl of mine just discovered her truck driving husband has a chic pregnant in South Carolina. She and her husband reside in North Carolina.

Answer 5

Penny A has hit the spot bang on. She's right. All that i was hoping to write is already there. Just one piece of advice... lot of times in life, we make wrong judgements. Plus God is kind to those who are good. So apart from staying on-guard, simply say a prayer everyday. Maybe he's making a mistake. A big bad mistake. I'll pray that all turns out well. you can write to me at [e-mail] Good luck & god bless you.

Answer 6

I loved my second husband so much,that I refused to see the warning signs.He was foreman for a construction crew,and would be gone until late at night.He kept saying that he had to stay on the job until the mess was cleaned up.This combined with the fact that he also shaved his pubic hair made me even more suspicious.i had gone to work and when i got home,i tried to get intimate b/c he was going up to Tallahassee for a week.He refused the intimacy.When he got home,I walked in on him in the bathroom and discovered he had shaved his pubic hair.Know what the excuse was? He said he got tar on his pubic hair and couldn't get it out.Also his mom said she caught him one time while we were separated,cutting his pubic hair.I had a gut feeling that is was cheating and even after 3 years apart,he still will not fess up to cheating.

My thought is that if you feel in your heart and gut he is cheating,then he probably is.

P.S. sounds like you have plenty of reason to expect he is cheating.YOU ARE NOT PARANOID!!!!

Answer 7

when he home and after he goes to bed take the phone and get out of bedroom. If it rings answer it and thy to sound like him. say u have a clod and can hardly talk. Ask how the person is and let them carry on talking so u can see whats up

Answer 8

You do have reason to think he is cheating. My husband used to drive long haul and never acted like that. Ask him when he's going out again and tell him you want to go with him, just to see what he says, if he starts making excuses as to why you shouldn't go, let him know you are suspicious of his behaviour.

Answer 9

Kittykat, look at what you have answered to "Questionman"s question. You said, you are 38 and you have "Lust" for a 27 year old and "we wanta **** so bad" (these are exactly your words). Now, if you want to be into someone else's bed, its ok, if your hubby slips into someone's .. its serious situation !! Isn't this double standard ?

I would say, what goes around, comes around too.

Answer 10

Yes.... Your suspicions are correct.... That's my very honest opinion.
What to do now.....
Go with him on the road if you can and definately confront him with your suspicions. If he's cheating he'll take the defensive, tell you that you're crazy and he may even say that he's not going to deal with you "accussing" him.
All of that is "standard protocol" for a male in this situation. They'll do what they can to avoid having to face their own deceit and responsibility and blame their wife/partner instead.

There is no reason to be secretive with his cell phone or anything for that matter with you. You're his wife and he should think of you as his soul mate and help mate.

I'm sorry about this, truly.... It can rip your heart out (feels like it) but making excuses for him isn't going to make him respect you and it'll defiinately not make it go away.
Be Proactive right now.....