My bf of 5 years, is shia muslim (me hindu) and as soon as he told his parents about us, they forcedv him & arranged him to be married to a muslim girl.
They have been married 4 weeks & has not even touched the girl nor does he speak to her nicely & she is in tears everyday & does not know what she has done wrong.
He only married this girl to make his parents happy but does not love the girl and wants to leave.
He tells me that he will find a way out of this marriage and make it look like the girl did something wrong to cause the marriage breakdown, also tells me to continue with my life, get married etc etc...but says that he will leave and come to me.....what am I to do? I beleive he is telling me the truth.
2007-03-03 14:24:39 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First of all what is wrong with you. Your a woman also how can u see another woman suffer. Tell ur idiot bf to grow up and treat teh woman he married fairly. He does'nt love her doesn't wanta be with her divorce her or find a way out or seek her help outta the marriage. Tell him treating her like **** is putting more bad karma on ur relationship and will make sure u two wont ever be together. Sweetheart ur bf is doing an injustice to her and he wants u to do the same mistake to another man. HE WANTS U to marry and then u cheat on ur ur husband. Marriage is not a joke.........if u dont wanta be apart of it get outta it tell him that tell him to tell his current wife to help him figure a way out instead of treating her and having the girl go through hell BE A GOOD HUMAN BEING an good things will come to u... RIGHT NOW SWEETIE UR THE OTHER WOMAN UR HIS MISTRESS SHE'S NOT. BE smart tell him to be good to his wife be friends with her and to seek her help in gettin goutta the marriage good luck
2007-03-03 14:30:49 · answer #1 · answered by Confused4life 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think he loves you and you should wait for him and not get married in a hurry.
Also ask him to talk to his parents that in today's world being conservative doesn't help.
The world is evolving. It is growing at a faster rate than they could ever be able to fathom.
They have to understand that the world has started to open up.
He should talk to his parents and get a divorce from his wife amicably and in a respective manner, not showing that it has been her fault all this time, because its not her fault at all, she doen't even know what's happening.
Even if his parents don't agree, both of you can marry at your own will because both of you are adults now and are entitled to marry at any age in your adulthood.
Once you get married, then after some time his parents will have to accept your relationship, whether they like it or not.
GOOD LUCK with life!!!
2007-03-03 19:28:01 · answer #2 · answered by kchl_dk007 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very proud of you that before going to do something that you are asking frankly. Here I wants to show you some facts about it. One muslim boy at our nearest doing Paris electricals service loved a Hindu girl fro Sooliapatty a rural area. He said and promised everything to help her and marry her. by the reliable words she believe on it and went away with him. He spent three months with her, after his sexual desire over he left the girl without other about her future. Now nobody wants to marry her. her life is under struggle. This is not the only case. We have 18 evidences. All the case went with vein and pathotic. I am very sorry to say you that they leave after one or two years or after getting one child birth. At puthanatham a working women also cheated by a muslim at the concern itself. But in the final they gave money for her. I am vexatiously telling you the fact that some heartless fellows are there. So I suggest that leave him to live along with a married wife. Don't carry the sin of her. Get turn in your life to go with a better future. Long live.
2007-03-03 15:08:20 · answer #3 · answered by Secretary, Consumer Movement 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What the hell... You guys would be punishing the poor girl just because you couldn't convince your parents for your own marraige. If he really loved you, he could have convinced his parents prior to his marraige. Hoe couldn't. And now he saying that hew would run away from those responsibilities against the girl, blame her for some thing lame, and get rid of her. Is it fair? Are you sure that once he comes to you, he won't go back if his parents pressurize him again?
I believe he is a meek little fellow, who has no idea as to what he wants from life. In his pursuit, he would be disturbing everyone's life - the girl;s, his parents, and off course yours too. Be careful.
All the best...
:-)
2007-03-05 16:58:37 · answer #4 · answered by plato's ghost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
these Muslims still follow a feudalistic pattern where grey hair reins supreme. The younger generation will find it very tough to follow their yearnings unless they get away from their joint family totally by living an independent life.
Your b/f seems to have been caught in the above scenario and finds it difficult to break away from it as is exemplified in his marriage to a girl of his family's choice. Seems he is quite dependent on them, still.
Unless he is able to break away from this dependency of whatever sort, religious, cultural, economic, familial, etc I don,t see how he will succeed in whatever he is telling you--past actions speak more than words.
Besides, now it will involve a complicated parting where a person of your own sex will be at stake. Will you like it?
Whatever hope, love has thrown up should be weighed against this background which appears bleak.
It is time to take things in your own hand for your future rather than emotions ruin you completely.
2007-03-04 02:05:35 · answer #5 · answered by mcmohan40 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You only believed what you want to hear. He did tell you to make a life for yourself. He did married someone other than yourself for his parent sake, so he said. Ummmmmm......I think not. Move on, find someone who will love you as you deserve to be love. Don't waste you time with this one. It's over, whether you want to admit it or not.
2007-03-03 14:33:17 · answer #6 · answered by qasizan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is lieing,he has bee married for 4 weeks and he says he has not not touched the girl,dont belive him,even i would say the same thing,forget the issue .keep your self in the plase of the married girl and think how you will fell if your husband has such a extra maritial affair,if he truely loved you he would have killed him self but must have not married,foolish girl he wants to travel in two boats at a time,and muslims are also allowed to do so by law.so open your eyes and trust your parents.run before it is to late.
2007-03-03 18:00:12 · answer #7 · answered by toploser 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a losing proposition for you. You need to forget about him and move on. He doesn't really love you if he allows his parents to push him into this marriage. Here is a simple answer for you: send a nice gift and then forget him and move on with your life. Find someone who can really love you for who you are.
2016-03-16 03:54:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
watever he is telling can't be true as once u get married he is planning to break 4 persons.
so better understand the situation and find someone else of ur choice and let them also live happily.
2007-03-04 18:18:11 · answer #9 · answered by Kumar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey have you gone mad they are married since 4 weeks it is not possible that he not even touched the girl he is lying to you can you believe that girl never asked him why is he doing this to her yaar wake up this is 21 century that boy is using you dont become his puppet if he loves you then he would not ask you to marry another boy in my view start your life once again i hope you will forget him best of luck for your future
2007-03-03 18:35:29 · answer #10 · answered by cool girl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋