What can i do to get the spark back in my marriage? My wife seems to not want sex any more.?

Answer 1

Wait a little on the marriage counseling. First, plan to work your azz off to pamper and please your wife. If you have kids, get rid of them for at least 2 full days.

On your own, or hire someone, clean your house from top to bottom, Give your wife cash money for a day at the spa if she likes that stuff or for a hair appt. or nails or both. Take her out or have a nice meal that she doesn't cook or clean up after and make some plans for doing something she loves.

Could be a movie or dancing or walking or a campfire or shopping or whatever. End with dessert and wine at home, give her a massage and about ten times the foreplay that you think she wants. Don't tire out, don't stop whispering sweet nothings and don't ask for anything in return.

Take it super slow and just aim to please.

This is your first night alone or the first night she is being treated as a princess. The next morning repeat the attention of the first night/day alone.

Breakfast out, or something you make, an activity she likes, canoeing, art exhibit, etc. "Date" your wife again. Flowers, a gift, back rub, time without demands and reality breathing down her neck.

A bunch of flowers thrust at her on a Wednesday 12 minutes before soccer practice or a love note in her purse are not enough at a time like this. Trust me.

She needs a total refueling time and then regular maintenance.

And you'll get laid more. I promise.

Answer 2

how old is she dose she have health problems has she ever had problems haveing sex is she going threw menopulse or post menopulse has she had a historectomy, or endermetreouses, or signs of ic , you need to talk to her to find out maybe she dont know how to approch you with the problem there is a lot of health issues that can keep woman from wanting sex men dosent take this stuff into concederation alot all they realize is they want sex and there not getting it but talk with her and see what the problem is first check with her health because if you dont and you keep doing everything nice like candle lite dinner and so forth it can make her feel like she dosent deserve you and she is not the wife you need and can drive her away , i know this from experence i have been diagnoise with all three of the things i just listed and it effects wemon in a lot of ways men just dont understand that its not them its the desiese its self causeing the problems hope this helps read up on line some of these things i have posted and see if wife has any of these symphons

Answer 3

Things to do:
*** see if there is emotional damage that doesn't allow her to connect here
** examine you behavior throughout the day- are you setting the mood all day or just ignoring her and then wanting to jump in the sack the minute the lites go out
** remember that for many women, one of the most romantic things may be that you also clean, do laundry, wash dishes, etc. This indicates that you see her work/role as important and validates her.
** spicing it up in the bedroom is all about technique- ignore those folks as they see sex as mere strategy, cool moves, techniques and bluster w/o real love and compassion
** if you need techniques, consider books on Tantric sex, 100 nites of great lovemaking, 52 weeks of great sex, etc.
Good luck!

Answer 4

She maybe stressed out. Not with you, but with bills,and housework. I do not know exactly but she may need vitamins along with exercise. Your wife may need a vacation sometimes a change like a vacation can really make a big difference. Do you think she may think you do not love her? If so send her a flower to her, by suprise. Some women think that men think they are fat,and if you look at other women,magazines. This will not make her feel any better. This is just my thinking. Good Luck!!!!

Answer 5

This is a long shot, but if she's on Depo Provera (birth control shot), that's probably the problem.

If not, then have you tried to talking to her and finding out if something's bothering her? I think that's the way to go. Then follow it up with some of these other suggestions - that makes her feel valued and like you're listening to her, and really want to make her happy.

Answer 6

You need to talk to her and very seriously tell her you want to change whatever is not working right. Be sincere and open. She may not tell you because she thinks you don't care or is embarrassed. If her sex drive just dropped off, it could be a hormonal change or even a drug she is taking that lowered her sex drive. She may need to see a doctor to find out what is wrong.

Answer 7

Dress up in all purple and do your best Prince impersonation....
I'm sorry. Just teasing.
Seriously, Leave love notes for her in the car.
In the bedroom- Give her a feather massage.
Talk to her, Maybe she's stressed and offer help in getting the mental stress off her mind.
Good Luck!!

Answer 8

She could not want sex, because it's the same old song and dance. Try spicing things up in the bedroom. If that doesn't work and she still doesn't want sex, talk to her about it. You may have to resign yourself to the fact of a marriage without sex.

Answer 9

So who has been having the most fun all this time until now? Was it her? Have you ever asked her if it has been good for her? Have you ever asked her what she likes in bed? Have you been helpful and attentive outside of the bedroom? Do you help with household chores? with the kids? Do you listen to her,really listen to what she has to say?

The more no answers you had the smaller your chances of getting her interested again. For pete's sake go get a book and learn something about pleasing a woman,not just haveing sex, not just you getting off but learn something about what REALLY pleases women and it ain't what you probably think.

Answer 10

Start out simple. Sit close to one another, hold hands, talk to her and actually listen. A touch of any kind boosts endorphins. You may also try giving her a relaxing massage.