Wife or Girlfriend?

Question

I have been going through a divorce.

My wife and I have been seperated for 3 months and I have rebounded with a friend of mine that I have known for a long time. I think that I am treating the new woman with feelings I have for my wife. Recently, my wife and I have began to become "friends" and there is definately something still there. I have a 3 year old son that we both love and are both there for as a team.

Should I break up with the new girl with hopes of rekindling my relationship with my wife? or am I wishful thinking?

She left me by the way..... Thanks

She left me because we fought a lot.
She also knows that I have had sex with the girlfriend

Answer 1

Ok.. First off.. Do not get back with her just because you guys have a kid. My parents did that and all my brothers and I think that it was worse with them together then apart. You'll make each other miserable and it will be a drain on your kid!
If you truly love her and you're "IN love" with her.. (yes there is a difference) talk with her.
Ask her what her reasons for the separation were. Ask if those feelings are still present. if so tell her that you cannot commit to someone who is just going to give up when things get too hard. You owe your self some respect and wasting time with someone who does not fully commit to you and your relationship is just that, wasting time. Set boudaries for the relationship and set up couples counseling. and never ever involve your kid in the fundamentals of your relationship. always give your kid the easy feeling that you will always have love for his/her mother no matter what happens in your relationship.
If your "friend" and you have seomthing really special. something that would completely discourage you from reconciling your marriage.. then maybe your marriage is truly over.
in the end you need to truly soul search. and figure out what you want from this whole situation and act on that.

Answer 2

You should tell your girfriend what you are thinking to be fair.

It is better to wait after you break up unless there is a serious harm someone committed, before getting into a new relationship. This would prevent any harm coming to the new person. And that is why we should wait until marriage. Marriage is a commitment. Sometimes you just need time away.

What would your wife and you think about going to a counselor to work out your problems and feelings. We often don't really hear what we are saying and what those we love are saying to us. A thrid person can help clear things up.

Peace

Answer 3

Do what your heart tells you you need to talk to your wife and ask her if she wants to continue this relationship and if she says no then maybe filing for a divorce is the only way. But make sure you get to see your son and do not totally leave out of the picture. You need to get into your sons life and eventually explain to him when he is old enough that things between mommy and daddy did not work out and that's why we are not together. but if you and your wife want to get back together that is cool hopefully you both can mutually work things out and solve out your differences If there Is a chance of you and your wife getting back together I would break up with the girl you are seeing and tell her we need to end it now because I am married and that I love my wife

Answer 4

Even if you and your wife don't get back together again, you need to break up with this girl. You are leading her on and all the while, you have feelings for your wife still. Your wife have not forgotten the fact that you love her, and you know that she loves you. So talk to your wife and ask her to talk to you about her feelings and her wants. I bet she would love to be with you, but can't put up with the fighting. Get a minister to help you both or go to marriage counseling.

Answer 5

First take things slow and be flat out and honest about the way you feel and if she is feeling the same way before you make any decisions about the way you might think she feel women are very complicated creatures be true to your self if you want to make things work right let her know how you feel and what you want this time but i would definitly not countine seeing the other girl untill you can put all you emotions aside from that relationship make sure that you are ready to begin dating again with no outside emotional feelings for other people. GOOD LUCk

Answer 6

You need to ask your wife if she thinks in the near future if she thinks theres a chance you can work things out, and tell her about your feelings toward her. It sounds like you have a chance. As far as this other woman is concerned, if she has feelings for you they will still be there until you break things off with her and she wouldn't want a man anyway who still had feelings for his wife.

Answer 7

do not break up with your girlfriend= first off--why did your wife leave you ?? that's important--second is she just being friendly with you and wants to be only friends?? This may be because of your child also--why don't you just come out and ask your wife if she is just being friendly because she wants to remain on good terms or if she is interested in you in a loving way??==that way you will get the true scoop==better hope that she is not just jealous and doesn't want you with anyone else and doesn't want you with her either--some people are like that===good luck

Answer 8

First why did your wife leave you? You definetely need to leave the new girl alone. Whether you and your wife work it or not, the truth is that you aren't ready to move on yet. You need to address your divorce first. If there is a chance for you and your wife then why not work it out. You still love her and I am hoping she still loves you too. don't be so quick to quit! Love is a comlicated melody and once you get the tune and can sing to it, Stay in that choir!

Answer 9

Depends on why you broke up.

Youve invested alot in your wife and family. If you had a good long term investment, why would you throw away all your stock in it for something short term and unsure.

On the other hand, if you think she still wants to leave you it might be too high risk at this moment.

But i think for your childs sake, its always worth the risk. We can always take the hurt better than them when things dont work out.

Answer 10

a marriage is a covenant... u made a committment with this woman, if u have a chance to be with this woman and get ur family back together, I would most deff try.... you should ask ur wife if she still loves you and if there is a chance.. or does she sees u only as a friend... I sure hope for the best to you and ur family....