My ex-fiance and I were together for nine years. His sister and mom became a part of my heart and family; His sister's kids, I helped raise like they were my own. Our split has become too complicated for them: They don't understand why we don't come visit together and they constantly ask about me, which I know is difficult for him and his new gf. I now live in another state and I rarely see them or talk to them; they are never home when I call. His mom and sister contact me once in a great while, but not often enough. I know that it must be difficult for all of them, being in the middle. It doesn't help that he is still very much a part of my heart. It absolutely shatters me to think of letting them go, but I feel I'm being selfish and illogical in trying to maintain contact with them. I'm considering writing a goodbye letter to their mom, in the hopes she can explain it to them better when they are old enough to understand. Any advise?
2007-03-03 06:08:58 · 5 answers · asked by mzindica 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
They are ages 11, 7 and 4.
2007-03-03 06:23:35 · update #1
I think the letter would be a good idea. Make sure you keep from blaming anyone. They just need to understand how you feel and that you feel it would be best to move in a different direction in your life. They'll be hurt, but don't give them anything to be angry with you. Tell them how you feel about them and how much they meant to you, but that sometimes people can only be in a person's life for a short period of time, and that their time with you made you a better person. Have someone else proofread it to make sure it comes across the way you want. Good luck.
2007-03-03 06:16:25 · answer #1 · answered by S K 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U didn't say how old r the kids we're talking about here?? But anyway, I dn't think u owe anybody an appology. Coz u didn't do sthg wrong.
But for being good & nice with the ppl u loved & lived with for so long, u can talk to his sister or his mother, tell her how much u love them & how much u miss them & the kids. Then ask her gently: "Do they ask about me?" If she said: "yes of course, they do", then ask her nicely to explain to them why u r not around anymore. You may also add: "I wish u can ecuse me for not being able to call so often as I used to, u know, life is full of actions & stuff".. or anything like that.
2007-03-03 06:20:10 · answer #2 · answered by lamo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart~ i'm interior the very comparable difficulty stunning now....it is so stressful for the reason which you like the guy, and you do no longer decide for to be different than for him, yet on the comparable time you're ill and tired of each and all the bickering. I even have come to a factor that I shop a laptop, and that i write to him. I clarify to him my emotions, and basically the place i'm at on issues. He has been open to analyzing it, and attempting to comprehend my perspective. it rather is important which you will sit down and talk with him while issues are kosher. permit him be responsive to which you like him, and you decide on for the courting to artwork, yet issues are no longer working. Ask him how he feels.....permit him see which you're prepared to fulfill him interior the midsection with issues. with any luck he will open up, and comprehend basically what he will lose out on if issues dont replace. do no longer supply up.....Love withstands plenty. Heaven and Hell. have self assurance me, walking away sounds so crisp, however the aftermath of your determination will basically hang-out you. good success sweetie.
2016-09-30 03:51:57 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chances are these children will not remember you by the time they are old enough to understand. Just hope for their well being and let them go.
2007-03-03 06:13:27 · answer #4 · answered by trailsend1992 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just stay in another state they will forget about you soon.
2007-03-03 06:13:02 · answer #5 · answered by Melody 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋