Kay, I have a young daughter I am married to her father we have not been togather for almost 3 years!He doesnt pay anything and he sees her maybe once a month for a few hours!I have just told him that i want a divorce and now he wants joint custody!He also wants me to allow her to go to an Islamic school and threatens me if i dont do it!I dont have a problem with the religion at all!!Want to say that up front!I havent gone to court because the truth is i am afraid! I love have our daughter with me we have done good over the years and I am happy and proud of the little young lady she is becoming I dont want things to get ugly with her father but I dont want her to be bounce from home to home with a father she really doesnt know!Also, he wants to take her home to meet his family in another country i dont want to say what one but is this a good idea or not!I want her to know her family but you know the stories you read!help please!
2007-03-03 06:02:36 · 7 answers · asked by rere 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to get an attorney as soon as possible. If there is no visitation order in place, you can and should refuse to let her visit him. Your lawyer will inform the court of the situation regarding taking her out of the country and will file the needed legal documents to prevent this from happening. He cannot take her without applying for a passport and there can be legal documents filed to prevent him from getting one for her. As far as his being able to get joint custody - I don't think you have anything to worry about. This is rarely done anymore. Judges are very hesitant to order this - especially when the minor child is as young as yours is. Her being female also works against him at this age. The fact that he has paid you no support will not be looked on kindly by the judge. You do need to get an attorney to handle this for you ASAP.
2007-03-03 06:26:33 · answer #1 · answered by arkiemom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may get joint custody but that doesnt automatically mean he would have her 50% of the time. The judge still has to issue "primary physical" and that would most likely stay w you. Lots of fathers have "joint custody" but only see the child every other weekend or something. The judge will take everything into account before making a decision but if you can you should get an attorney and I would make a stink about taking her out of the country because if he does and decided not to return her you will then be dealing w the laws in that country and your custody order here wont mean much.
2007-03-03 07:03:16 · answer #2 · answered by jillmarie2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let's see...he wants her to go to an Islamic school but you don't want to say which country he wants to take her to meet his family in...DUH you couldn't get anymore obvious than if you tried. What YOU want as far as custody goes isn't waht the court is going to be interested in when it comes to the support custody part of your divorce. All the court is going to be concerned with is what is in the best interest of the CHILD, whether YOU like it or not. However you CAN have it stipulated in the custody papers that he is not allowed to take your daughter across state lines (or outside the continental U.S.) without express written permission from you. Joint custody isn't half as bad as adults try to make it out to be. I have older half sisters and their parents (my father their mother) had 50/50 custody of them and they LOVED it. They learned how to cope with going from one home to another, how to get along with people in different areas and how to take what they learned in one family and apply it to the other. Okay so right now she doesn't know her father all that well...in his custody she will get to know him. YOU are the one standing in her way of doing so and every child deserves the right to know BOTH parents whether YOU like it or not...you CHOSE to make a child with this man...he has the right to joint custody of his daughter.
2007-03-03 06:13:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's not a whole lot of courts in this country that will grant custody to a father unless the mother can be proven to be unfit. If that's not the case, don't worry about it. Keep a record of his visitations (date/time/anything in particular that happens negative) and take it to court with you.
Good luck!
2007-03-03 06:12:17 · answer #4 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No do not let him take her to another country. He may leave and not come back with her so he can raise her like he wants. You would have a terrible time getting her back.
2007-03-03 06:08:29 · answer #5 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not a good idea to let him take her out of the country. He could refuse to come back and then it could be almost impossible to get her back.
2007-03-03 06:17:23 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie you need major advice, not what you can get from us on answers. You need a good family law attorney. Get some expert advice because this whole business about taking your daughter to visit another country is scary. I know I wouldn't want to let her go if she were my daughter. Good luck and please let me know how it turns out. Please e-mail me.
2007-03-03 06:12:29 · answer #7 · answered by mjm52 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋