Is being abused by a partner worse than being abused by a parent?

Question

I was just wondering if being abused by a parent isnt considered to be as bad as being abused by someone else, like a spouse. I think that i might be being abused by a parent. The abuse includes pushing, shoving, hitting, yelling, swearing and calling names. The most harm it has caused so far is brusing and subtle bleeding and it doesnt go to that extent very often. Is this ok if it is coming from a parent? It's been going on for a while. I'm confused.

Answer 1

subtle bleeding ??????
this wouldn't have occured after the gang rape would it when you were 23 & away at college by any chance?
Someones being a naughty girl/boy here on Y/A aren't they???

Answer 2

First of all you need to contact someone and get help with stopping the abuse.
To answer you question, any and all abuse is wrong. There is no one type of abuse that is universally considered worse than any other. If you want to know which is worse it depends on several factors. It depends on the mental and emotional state of the abuser and the victim, also the age, sex, and type of abuse. Some people have bad relationships with there parents and so a spouse might be the only one they feel loves them and so for the spouse to abuse them it's devestating. On the othere hand if the victim is a young child, their parents is all they know and trust and so abuse from them would be equally horrible.

Answer 3

I think being abused by anyone is bad. A parent is suppose to be your protector and you feel like you have no choice but to stay. You can tell your teacher or the counselor at your school what is going on. I know you must love your parents and want to protect them but that is not your job. If they are getting so upset and hurting you, they are the ones that are wrong and need help. I am sure that they don't like it when they hurt you. They must really need some professional help themselves. By you telling someone about what is going on, not only are you doing what is best for yourself but for them as well. May God be with you while you during this difficult time in your life.

Answer 4

Laurie,

Abuse of any kind is never good. There is a huge difference between Abuse and discipline. Discipline is a product of loving correction and direction. It is used to bring about changes in attitudes and behaviors that lead our children into dangerous and harmful situations. A slap in the hand, to stop a child from touching a hot burner, for instance. While there are varying degrees of discipline, discipline is a temporary pain, for a long term gain. Abuse, on the other hand, is a manifestation of anger, vented to the abused, by the abuser. It is an act of rage, rather than an act of love. Abuse has short term gain, and, long term pain. The slapped hand of a child will hurt for but a short time, but, a slap across the face can carry pain that will last a lifetime. Discipline is done out of love and concern for our children, but, abuse is done out of anger, and a lack of understanding concerning its long term consequences. The abuse done by a parent, and that of a spouse, can both cause extreme anxiety and emotional distress. In both cases, the abuser is an individual who is responsible for the care and protection of the person they are abusing. No wonder you are confused! The one who is supposed to protect you from harm, is committing a harmful act of betrayal. Abuse can cause misplaced guilt, poor self esteem, insecurity, feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. If you have experienced bruising and bleeding as a result, get professional assistance immediately. Get individual and family counseling, as soon as possible. Remember, the abuser very seldom feels genuine remorse for their actions, and, the abuse often escalates. Seldom does the abuse stop on its own. And, all too often it ends up with permanent injury, and, sometimes death. As a father of seven, I can understand a parents response to their children manifesting itself in anger. But, that anger must never be directed at the child to the degree that it results in physically and emotional abuse. Laurie, contact me if you need more help, and, someone to talk to.

Good luck, and God Bless!

Answer 5

I think that abuse coming from a parent is worse. Children can't just walk away and get out of the situation. You can always leave an abusive lover. Also the psychological effect stemming from parental abuse is far worse because it usually starts early when children are learning trust and self esteem. That is definately abuse. I grew up with that and when I turned 18 and my step dad hit me for the last time, I decided I had enough and I moved out and never looked back. I was abused on a daily basis starting early in childhood. It was physical and mental. I learned that I would never stand for being hit again. An ex boyfriend hit me one time. It was the last I ever spoke to him. I kicked his butt out of my house and he ended up living in someone's garden shed because I had taken care of him for so many years that he was unable to support himself.

Answer 6

Hon, you are being abused in the worst possible way! Your parents are supposed to care for you and show you love. Abuse it not good from any person regaurdless of the relation. get some help. Are there other family memners you can turn to? An Aunt, or Uncle? If not call family services and ask for help. Good luck.

Answer 7

No. A child trusts a parent and REALLY has few options. A person can leave an abusive spouse much easier than a dependent child can leave a parent.

Answer 8

both of them are not good at all. No one should be hurt physically or even mentally. Abuse is not a very healthy relationship with your parents or spouse. You should get some help, because it could get even worse... It is better to act early than to be sorry.

Answer 9

Abuse by anyone is terrible, but the emotional damage can be marginally worse when its by a parent because you can always leave an abusive partner but to be abused by someone who is related to u by blood and who you look up to is worse.

Answer 10

abuse is abuse whether it is physical or verbal, whether it's parents or partner. It's also all illegal. You do not deserve this if you are speaking of yourself. Being called names and feeling worthless lasts a LIFETIME and it is so wrong. Please confide in your doctor, a teacher, a nurse, or tell an adult you trust. If they don't lead you to help try again. This is a pattern that believe it or not you could repeat in your own family one day unless it is stopped. I'm sure you don't want this to continue. It is NOT OK. My heart goes out to you.

Answer 11

It's never okay, from either. I think a partner may be a little worse because you are attached in a different state of mind than with a parent, but you shouldn't stand for either.